Someguy333 Posted May 22, 2016 Share Posted May 22, 2016 My very close friend has recently been acting very uninterested in what I have to say/talk about. A lot of the time when she starts talking about something we both share interest in, we can talk about it at great length. Even when she's passionate about something that I don t really know much about, I'll still listen and discuss it with her if I have anything of value to say, simply because she has good input on things and I'm happy for her when she is happy. However, it seems that when I have some sort of important news to share, or something that makes me feel happy to talk about, she doesn't seem to pay much attention to it at all. I understand that having an anxiety disorder does make that seem to be the case, when in reality it may not be. But at the same time, it makes our relationship seem a bit one-sided at times, when it feels like she doesn't care about what I have to say most times. I want to talk to her about it, because I want to understand what she's going through so I can be there for her. At the same time, however, I don't want to make her more anxious by bringing it up and potentially making her more self-conscious about it. Thoughts on what I should do/say? Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted May 22, 2016 Share Posted May 22, 2016 The person I know best with anxiety disorder frankly doesn't really give a crap about most people at all and thinks the rest of the world is wrong and he is superior. I'm sure not everyone is alike, at least I hope not. If I were you I'd say "Hey, are you even listening?" With this guy, he seems very narcissistic besides the anxiety. Maybe she has that component as well and truly doesn't care to talk about it if it's not also her passion. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted May 23, 2016 Share Posted May 23, 2016 The person I know best with anxiety disorder frankly doesn't really give a crap about most people at all and thinks the rest of the world is wrong and he is superior. I'm sure not everyone is alike, at least I hope not. If I were you I'd say "Hey, are you even listening?" With this guy, he seems very narcissistic besides the anxiety. Maybe she has that component as well and truly doesn't care to talk about it if it's not also her passion. Far from it. That person just sounds like a selfish inconsiderate person. I have an anxiety disorder. I am a people pleaser putting others first before my own needs, won't talk about my stuff and would rather help others. Having an anxiety disorder isn't an excuse to not be there for someone else or hear about their day, accomplishments etc. Someguy it just seems your friend is either having her own issues and can't deal at all with you or anybody else, can't focus etc or she's selfish. Is she getting help for her anxiety? CBT and/or medication? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Someguy333 Posted May 23, 2016 Author Share Posted May 23, 2016 I have considered the possibility that she is just being selfish, it's just odd because there will be some times where she will actively listen to things relating to me, and some times when she won't. It doesn't happen too often, but it's just sort of odd. I'm actually not sure if she's taking therapy but I was asking her today about how her recent doctor's appointment went, and apparently she's taking new medication, and the change has been making her feel tired and off. Hopefully that info helps. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted May 23, 2016 Share Posted May 23, 2016 Is this girl just a friend or potential girlfriend? Just curious as to how emotionally invested you are in her and how much she is invested into you. I say be honest and sympathize with her about her anxiety, be supportive and compassionate, let her know that you expect the same in return from her. If she happens to be having a rough anxiety day maybe don't rely on her for support until she's feeling better. One thing about anxiety is it does mess with your head at times. (But still not an excuse to not listen to someone. I mean if she can't handle stuff at times, she needs to be honest and speak up, tell you how she is feeling and what she can/can't handle). At least she's getting help for her anxiety. How many years have you two been friends? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted May 23, 2016 Share Posted May 23, 2016 I don't think it's anxiety disorder. I think she's just disinterested in people other than herself. Seems to be an increasingly common ailment these days 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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