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Which is worse? Physical pain or emotional pain?


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Or to put it better which kind of pain can you tolerate more? Physical pain or emotional pain? If you come to a crossroads in life and you know that you only have 2 paths to choose and both paths are going to cause some level of pain but in different forms then it becomes a matter of picking your poison.

 

Take for example with me. I have a choice to make in regards to relationships for the rest of my life however long I live. I can either choose to decline opportunities for romantic or sexual relationships and feel lonely sometimes and maybe a little sad in spite of the fact that I am doing it to myself and can't expect sympathy from anyone. But the benefits of choosing that path is that I won't have to worry about the stresses that come from a relationship. I won't have to worry about being taken to divorce court and dumping most of my paycheck to my ex wife while I struggle from month to month to get enough food and other physical needs met.

 

At least while I am single I have more financial freedom and with that comes more opportunities to be as physically comfortable as possible. Can I tolerate emotional pain more than physical pain? I would have to say at this point in my life yes. I'm going through enough physical pain with illness and cancer treatments. At least I have some help in managing physical pain and discomfort related to cancer. Right now the physical pain is mild and being managed quite well with over the counter pain relievers. I won't take any more or less meds than what my body needs.

 

But financial difficulties and physical pain are interconnected. If you have a choice would you rather be financially secure and free of all physical pain knowing that you will still have to endure emotional pain? I mean when I get sad I think to myself well at least I can still walk and have all 5 senses. I don't want to take the physical freedoms for granted.

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Interesting question.

 

I can't answer which is considered "worse" for each individual, but, if both were considered as separate entities I would take physical pain over emotional pain.

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leavesonautumn

I can tolerate physical pain over emotional. It's hard to compare the two but based on what I've been through (and honestly, just being a woman :p), my tolerance for pain is quite high.

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I'd take a physical beating over an emotional one any day...broken bones heal a lot more quickly and a lot more easily.

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I've come to learn the hard way that my mind is stronger than my body.

 

I will take the emotional pain.

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Yeah, same here.

 

A few years ago, I went through a D and a loved one's death at the same time and, yeah, it was pretty painful emotionally, but paled in comparison to some physical pain of that same era which had me on the floor looking for religion I hadn't embraced in decades. I recalled my father and his pain when dying of liver cancer and what he spoke of at that time suddenly made perfect sense.

 

If I had a choice, and we rarely do in life in such matters, I'll take the emotional pain.

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Personally, I can take physical pain because of the possibility that it can heal over time perhaps leaving only scars. On the other hand, emotional pain takes longer to heal with a possibility to come back to life at anytime. Also, it takes a toll on the health as well.

 

 

I am still here after all this time. I don't think I could have been around a health forum.

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Without jinxing myself; I'll go the emotional pain route as well.

 

I'm too much of a hypochondriac for physical pain. Wait...that kinda ties into emotional pain too - all the stressing? Dammit, never mind, I'll take physical.

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I wonder if you have two questions here...cuz, I'm not sure if you're equating physical/emotional pain with taking one path or another when it comes to flying solo or having a RL with someone.

 

First, if you're talking about relationships? Well, that is complex cuz it depends what kind of RL you are seeking.

 

If the question is marriage v. singlehood. Well, there's pros and cons. Yeah, in a marriage you might loose not only financially, but emotionally and/or physically. I mean, I'm tired of the stories I hear of people who are "trapped" cuz divorce is too expensive, child custody issues, and/or the spouse stops having sex and/or tending to the marriage and/or kids.

 

I grew up seeing how easy it is for my dad to tell my mom that he doesn't 'owe any of us anything'. That stuff sticks in your head (emotional). I'm sorry, but I don't see how therapy is gonna shake that out of my head. He was also physically abusive, but those words are what did more damage. So, for me, emotional and financial damage is worst than physical if you ask me.

 

Also, the quality of the "males" out there doesn't make me any more confident to let down my guard and trust some guy with my money and heart.

 

In anything you decide to do - there's give and take. Some people need marriage cuz it gives them purpose. They have to get a job and be responsible. Also, loving others is great too.

 

As a single woman w/o kids. I try to fill that emotional satisfaction that some people get from marriage by filling my life with "purpose". I help my family members, I volunteer, I stay active.

 

I like being single. I can come and go when I want. Buy what I want. Get up late if I want. I don't have to worry about anyone else cuz I rely on me.

 

Now, the downside of me not wanting kids and/or marriage, and being independent has left me with trying to keep someone around for more than a few years and/or months. Again, with everything there is give and take.

 

If you want companionship without the responsibilities and/or fears of financial/emotional/physical pain of marriage - I think you shouldn't have a problem in finding women who will provide you companionship w/o marriage. Now, some may wanna shack up with you and/or try to sneak in a pregnancy - but still I think the way women go about dating now a days favors men more than women.

 

If you play your cards right, I bet you can even find one like Lady2163 described in a thread - who would go to her bf's dorm each day, cook, clean, sex him and leave. Now, that chick did do that with the ultimate intent for him to marry her, but eh, that sorta is the downside of most women - at some point they are gonna want that marriage and/or kids. Well, again, if you play your cards right you can probably give them some silly "promise ring" and extend it as long as you can. If they bail, there's more chicks out there.

 

I know this sounds cold, but I've heard of so many stories of women taken men for a ride - especially after they get the ring. Then, the courts working against men, I see where a man would not want to risk his money, time, and/or heart in marriage now a days.

 

Now, with you having cancer. I can't tell you what to do, but if I had cancer I would not try to start a family. I wouldn't be good knowing I brought children into this world and I wouldn't be there to seem them grow and/or have grandchildren. I mean, if I found out I had a terminal illness AFTER I had kids, I would do every thing I can to live for them - but, to bring them into this world WHEN I KNOW I have a terminal illness, is IMO, taking a parent away from them in the long run.

 

Also with the cancer, would a woman be wanting to take on the role of a wife when she knows at some point you will be leaving her and/or the kids you may have? I've heard some men call into that podcaster I listen to cuz they were ambivalent about telling women they date that they had an illness - but I think you owe it to that person to decide what kind of RL they would want to have with you - knowing you may not be around for the long haul.

 

And finally, with the cancer. If you spend your final years sheltering yourself from life, experiences, etc. well, that's your prerogative. But, from what you posted about your crush, seems like she's at an age/point in her life where she's not looking for kids and she's handling her own business. Maybe if you chat her up, you may find out that she would be ok with having a "companionship" with you w/o all the marriage, kids, white picket fence. Now, wouldn't you want to spend your last days enjoying yourself physically (sex) and emotionally (romance), then hiding in loneliness?

 

If you don't put yourself out there and meet/speak to people - you may never find out someone/something that can possibly meet your physical/emotional desires w/o all the headache that comes from relationships (especially relationships now a days).

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As far as the cancer thing goes yeah I have a moral responsibility to divulge that information to those women once they demonstrate an interest in getting closer to me. I don't want that on my conscience that I didn't at least give them fair warning that I could kick the bucket at any time.

 

And with doing a long engagement thing to stall a woman off if she starts hinting or talking about marriage? Yeah some guys will do that or come up with excuses like "I'll marry you once I get my business going". It sounds very responsible for a guy to want to have his ducks in a row before marrying but in practice often times that's just an excuse to stall her off indefinitely. I have a friend who brags to me about stalling off his girlfriend. She wants to get married and he told me that he will just keep finding ways to stall and string her along until she gets fed up and leave.

 

Well he can do whatever he wants. He is his own person but I have my own conscience to answer to if I did that. Maybe in my 20s I wouldn't think anything of it to string a woman along who wanted a family but now at age 34 I am surprised how strongly my conscience comes after me for things like that.

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Emotional pain.

 

I've had a life threatening illness, followed by numerous ops, but all the while it was happening to me, I knew I was strong enough physically to overcome it..I did thankfully.

 

Emotional, I'm alluding to depression, my black dog..something i deal with on a daily basis, it's excruciating in so many ways and I don't know if I'll ever be well mentally again.

 

So definitely physical pain over psychological pain.

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emotional pain.. as I've gotten older it's easier as the scars tend to build quicker..

A heart.. the only thing left is a beating lump of scar tissue :laugh:

 

I also can work with emotional pain, if my knee blows out I can't make a living...

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Reading further responses, it did occur that, as the mind and body are one, emotional pain, which is essentially a chemical process, also impacts the body chemically and can produce both physical pain as well as deteriorate the body physically, depending on the type and amount of chemicals being produced and released. So, is heartache or a heart attack worse? Depends. They could be one and the same.

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MercuryMorrison1

For me personally...Emotional.

 

I've broken two bones in my life and even had to walk over a mile on a broken leg once, but that was no comparison to some of the emotional hell I've experienced.

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todreaminblue

I have never had a broken bone in my life.....come really close though.......quite a few beatings..even as child couldnt stone me a broken bone..........ill take the physical pain.....my heart is more fragile than my body...i can go away from physical pain ...somewhere deep and untouchable....my heart is often on my sleeve...so ..yeah physical pain doesnt get my heart....i once said the rhyme sticks and stones .......but the names hurt more.......the rhyme has it backwards..............deb

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I like physical pain, because I know my body can take it and heal itself to hopefully stronger than before and within my control.

 

Emotional pain is much more complex when it comes to what some people can experience, and can take much longer and more thorough ways to heal. It also usually takes longer-- some people I've known carry vendettas and grudges that poisons their mind.

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It depends.

 

Are we talking about chronic physical pain? My back and neck constantly hurt and I can neither sit nor stand for more than five minutes without having to shift? I can't sleep at night because my tailbone and hips and back and neck are all throbbing? All I can do is take meds that put me in a drool-inducing haze?

 

I'd likely take the zombie-fog of emotional pain over that. Emotional pain I can compartmentalize and dull with exercise and focus.

 

But if we're talking the pain of a loved one's death versus me breaking my arm? Physical all day.

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skydiveaddict
Or to put it better which kind of pain can you tolerate more? Physical pain or emotional pain?

 

Emotional pain is much much worse

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I suspect people will answer according to the extent they have felt pain so far in their life. I've known emotional pain that hurt like hell but have used the mind to overcome. I've also done the same with physical pain in regards to working with broken bones, torn muscles, slipped discs. There is, however, a world of physical pain out there that's beyond imagination. I'll take emotional pain over experiencing anything like that again.

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Lernaean_Hydra

I can tolerate emotional pain way more. I used to suffer from really horrible complex migraines with "auras" and blackouts and my entire head would feel like someone was either squeezing my skull in a vice or drilling an icepick through my brain. Even the strongest prescription meds - including morphine - failed.

 

Alternatively, I've also dealt with crippling anxiety and depression (still deal with it to this day) to the point where I'd wake up out of my sleep in the middle of a panic attack for no apparent reason. Very scary stuff.

 

Still uh, yeeeaah, I'll take the emotional pain over physical any day.

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for me, noting worst than emotional pain. i can endure physical pain, but inside torture, it's killing me. Like what the old saying says, "Physical is nothing when it comes to verbal offense."

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Eternal Sunshine

I have become a pro at dealing with emotional pain and I would take it over physical any time, no question.

 

I had some serious health problems in the past that took me out of life (unable to work or even go out with friends, forget dating) for a while.

 

With emotional pain, I can always cope and stay functional.

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Physical pain is worse. If you think some heartache over anything is worse than physical pain, you just haven't really actually had physical pain.

 

Even people that think they are having so much emotional pain that they just absolutely must kill themselves to make the pain go away, try to do so in a way that does not cause much physical pain.

 

You ever see someone burn to death slowly? Trust me, your heartache over not getting the mate you wanted does not compare.

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