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I have been debating with myself for several weeks on if should tell him how I feel


Georgia2014

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I met this guy on a dating site 2 years ago. We are just friends we only text. I know he's not dating anyone right now. I have been debating with myself all month on if I should tell him how I feel. That I see him as more than a friend. We used to hang out a lot a year ago but we no longer hang out we only text. He is usually quick about answering my texts.

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TheyCallMeOx
I am afraid of rejection.

 

How would you rather feel:

 

1. afraid of rejection, but go through your life not knowing the truth of how he feels? Or what if you choose to not pursue him, out of your fear, and find out a couple weeks from now that he's in a relationship?

 

2. worst case, you're rejected by the dude. However, you know the truth and you're able to move on without, down the road, regretting that you tried?

 

Don't be afraid of the truth because the truth is all that we have. You may not even be rejected. What if the dude likes you back and you and him end up getting married? You may end up, 30 years down the road, being like "damn...I almost didn't message this guy." Either way, rejected or not, you're going to be okay. I'd rather live with the fact that I wasn't someone's type than not knowing whether I had a chance or not.

 

But that's just me.

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How would you rather feel:

 

1. afraid of rejection, but go through your life not knowing the truth of how he feels? Or what if you choose to not pursue him, out of your fear, and find out a couple weeks from now that he's in a relationship?

 

2. worst case, you're rejected by the dude. However, you know the truth and you're able to move on without, down the road, regretting that you tried?

 

Don't be afraid of the truth because the truth is all that we have. You may not even be rejected. What if the dude likes you back and you and him end up getting married? You may end up, 30 years down the road, being like "damn...I almost didn't message this guy." Either way, rejected or not, you're going to be okay. I'd rather live with the fact that I wasn't someone's type than not knowing whether I had a chance or not.

 

But that's just me.

 

You have made a very good point. You are also right.

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You have made a very good point. You are also right.

 

I just sent him a text and told him how I feel about him. Now I am waiting to hear back. I am on pins and needles waiting to hear from him.

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How would you rather feel:

 

1. afraid of rejection, but go through your life not knowing the truth of how he feels? Or what if you choose to not pursue him, out of your fear, and find out a couple weeks from now that he's in a relationship?

 

2. worst case, you're rejected by the dude. However, you know the truth and you're able to move on without, down the road, regretting that you tried?

 

Don't be afraid of the truth because the truth is all that we have. You may not even be rejected. What if the dude likes you back and you and him end up getting married? You may end up, 30 years down the road, being like "damn...I almost didn't message this guy." Either way, rejected or not, you're going to be okay. I'd rather live with the fact that I wasn't someone's type than not knowing whether I had a chance or not.

 

But that's just me.

 

When I told him how I felt I then said I hope this won't ruin our friendship if he doesn't feel the same. He didn't really say either way how he felt he just said that's ok I understand.

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Sorry it didn't turn out better.

 

Thank you. :)

 

At least now I do know and not keep wondering what if.

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TheyCallMeOx
Thank you. :)

 

At least now I do know and not keep wondering what if.

 

Sometimes you win some, and sometimes you lose some. I'm proud of you for taking a risk. I know it's not easy to pursue people and deal with rejection but the important thing you have to take out of this is the fact that now you know what you need to do: move on to other dudes. It's important to note that just because someone may not be interested in you doesn't mean you have nothing to offer. There are dudes out there who would date the f*ck out of you, but you gotta go through the bad to get to the good. :)

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Sometimes you win some, and sometimes you lose some. I'm proud of you for taking a risk. I know it's not easy to pursue people and deal with rejection but the important thing you have to take out of this is the fact that now you know what you need to do: move on to other dudes. It's important to note that just because someone may not be interested in you doesn't mean you have nothing to offer. There are dudes out there who would date the f*ck out of you, but you gotta go through the bad to get to the good. :)

 

Thank you so much that made me feel better. I do appreciate your encouraging & kind words. It was because of your advice I told him and I feel proud for having the courage to tell him. We are still friends though. We still text.

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