ArminVanBuren Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 Is cold approach the only way? Are there any guys here who can meet women outside of their social circle/day to day life/work? Link to post Share on other sites
jcrew11 Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 try craigslist Link to post Share on other sites
Author ArminVanBuren Posted September 18, 2013 Author Share Posted September 18, 2013 try craigslist Online dating is I think by far the hardest one as a man. Odds are unbelievably stacked against you Link to post Share on other sites
crederer Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 When doing social things. Bar, hobby clubs, sports teams, or whatever else you do where other people are around. OLD is tough for guys, friends is a good route, why is this not an option for you? Link to post Share on other sites
Author ArminVanBuren Posted September 18, 2013 Author Share Posted September 18, 2013 When doing social things. Bar, hobby clubs, sports teams, or whatever else you do where other people are around. The only sport I really love playing is football, one that is 100% male dominated Bars are horrible as every girl is there with a 100 of her friends OLD is tough for guys, friends is a good route, why is this not an option for you? I've made dozens of friends over the years and none of them seemed to know any cute single girls Link to post Share on other sites
crederer Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 Girls at the bar with a bunch of their friends can certainly work to your favour if you play your cards right. Get her friends to like you as well and they'll be on your side helping you out. One time I was socializing with a few women and after a while, when they kind of broke off into smaller groups, I went up to one and said "hey, i think you and your friends are all very beautiful. Are any of them single?" And she literally was like "Omg, yes, come here" grabbed my hand, took me over to one of her friends and she was the best wing man ever. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author ArminVanBuren Posted September 18, 2013 Author Share Posted September 18, 2013 Girls at the bar with a bunch of their friends can certainly work to your favour if you play your cards right. Get her friends to like you as well and they'll be on your side helping you out. One time I was socializing with a few women and after a while, when they kind of broke off into smaller groups, I went up to one and said "hey, i think you and your friends are all very beautiful. Are any of them single?" And she literally was like "Omg, yes, come here" grabbed my hand, took me over to one of her friends and she was the best wing man ever. wow that's pretty amazing I always imagined talking to the friends as going horribly - you're just another perv trying to hit on her friend at a bar Link to post Share on other sites
crederer Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 Well if you present yourself as a perv, you'll be perceived as one. If you present yourself as a genuine good guy, you'll be perceived as one. Just don't get all sexual about it, be light and fun and complimentary (not in a pervy way) and it works man. I've done it a few times. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
StanMusial Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 Bars are horrible as every girl is there with a 100 of her friends How is that "horrible"? That's 99 more girls for you to talk to. Link to post Share on other sites
truth_seeker Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 Girls at the bar with a bunch of their friends can certainly work to your favour if you play your cards right. Get her friends to like you as well and they'll be on your side helping you out. One time I was socializing with a few women and after a while, when they kind of broke off into smaller groups, I went up to one and said "hey, i think you and your friends are all very beautiful. Are any of them single?" And she literally was like "Omg, yes, come here" grabbed my hand, took me over to one of her friends and she was the best wing man ever. Yes! So right! If the friends like you, your odds increase of getting the girl! Link to post Share on other sites
waiting4u Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 Well if you present yourself as a perv, you'll be perceived as one. If you present yourself as a genuine good guy, you'll be perceived as one. Just don't get all sexual about it, be light and fun and complimentary (not in a pervy way) and it works man. I've done it a few times. This. Do you have a corner pub - like a bar you go to regularly - twice a week or something? That can be a less intimidating situation because you feel comfortable there. And if you don't see a lot of girls there, then change places. Link to post Share on other sites
hppr Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 Well if you present yourself as a perv, you'll be perceived as one. If you present yourself as a genuine good guy, you'll be perceived as one. That's not exactly true. If you are unattractive then they are not going to like you no matter what comes out of your mouth. So if the OP is polite, nice, friendly, funny and they are running like hell...that is why. The good news is that you can fix this, the bad news is that it might take a lot of work... Link to post Share on other sites
hppr Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 Also sounds like you could use an attitude adjustment. Bars, Online, they can work pretty well you just have to adapt yourself to that environment. I've done it, takes work (a lot of which is counter-intuitive) but it is not impossible. Link to post Share on other sites
Bito Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 Do the Armin jesus pose... Link to post Share on other sites
PogoStick Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 The only sport I really love playing is football, one that is 100% male dominated You can either be stubborn and only play football or you can get into something new. 1. Personally I think volleyball is one of the best as girls are often better than the men. 2. Adult kickball 3. Biking groups are popular. They often do pub crawls, ride a few miles and stop at a bar, repeat a few times. Exercise, get drunk, and spend hours together with plenty of time to talk. 4. Hiking and skiing groups, same thing as #3 minus the alcohol. 5. Volunteer. Save some puppies or something. 3 girls for every guy. Link to post Share on other sites
jcrew11 Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 Yoga class, Organic grocery stores, Church, at the Mall Link to post Share on other sites
StanMusial Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 Pogo makes a good point, as a struggling guy you need to have better odds and ratios. I have mentione before several times, go to half price wine night at some trendy little bar somewhere. Just don't underwhelm the patrons with your extreme gayness. Link to post Share on other sites
Babolat Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 Is cold approach the only way? Are there any guys here who can meet women outside of their social circle/day to day life/work? Make friends with women, then you will meet their female friends. never thought of that until it happened with me...wa la! Just do the things YOU like to do, get out, go to events, festivals, whatever YOUR thing is...and you will meet like people, men and woman. Build your social circle. To the OLD comments; I have found OLD to actually be "easy". To me, it's just another forum, place if you will, to meet folks. No different than the above or a bar. Be yourself and you will attract like women. Don't be so critical about it. Last night, I logged into my profile, within 5 minutes 4 woman messaged me. I am not bragging at all..just saying, it's what you make of it. Link to post Share on other sites
Babolat Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 Yoga class, Organic grocery stores, Church, at the Mall I forgot about Yoga. I started doing yoga a few months ago for ME, never thought about meeting a woman there. The Ratio has to be 20:1 woman to men....easy peasy, right? And, I go with a female friend so my guess is I do not look like I am looking. Link to post Share on other sites
piggyoink Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 try the apps 'minus' and 'wechat' Link to post Share on other sites
jacksonvillae Posted September 19, 2013 Share Posted September 19, 2013 It is now well established that online dating sites are a regular part of meeting people with like interests. Find a dating site that appeals to you and create a profile. You can either look through the women already on the site according to mutual interests or you can wait for women to find you Link to post Share on other sites
El Brujo Posted September 19, 2013 Share Posted September 19, 2013 Meetups, meetups, and meetups. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted September 19, 2013 Share Posted September 19, 2013 Is cold approach the only way? Yep, IME, for myself anyway, cold approach is the only way. Are there any guys here who can meet women outside of their social circle/day to day life/work? Most of the women I meet are as a result of my traveling. Everyone in my social circle and general daily life/work is married, LTR'ed or young enough to be my daughter or granddaughter, so off-limits. Wish I had a magic formula but IME there is none. Enjoy life. That's a pretty good reward for living. Link to post Share on other sites
GravityMan Posted September 19, 2013 Share Posted September 19, 2013 Get out of the house regularly, do group based activities and gatherings that interest you, and expand your social network...both men and women. If they think you are a decent person then eventually they may introduce you to their friends or invite you to private parties or get-togethers, which may have single women. I think some women are more likely to give you a shot if there's a mutual friend or friend-of-friend in the picture, or if you've built up some rapport in a shared class or club. You're already pre-vetted or she's had some time to gauge you. IOW, it's usually safer from her point of view. Link to post Share on other sites
Bubberfly Posted September 21, 2013 Share Posted September 21, 2013 I met a few of my boyfriends at the oddest of places. One was in a night class at college. One was at the grocery store we both frequented. One was at the library I liked to go to. My fiancée I'm with now asked me out at a dog park, both our pooches played together. There's always places to meet the ladies, and even if you don't end up dating, make friends Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts