How can I mend our friendship?

[Seneya]

We caught feelings for each other but we both don't believe in long distance relationships. So, I decided to move on and told him I'll block him from Facebook and WhatsApp so that I could move on. He seemed quite reluctant but respected my decision. In the end he said, "thanks for letting me know."

Now, that I have unblocked him again I realised he was really hurt with the decision and not to mention I behaved quite selfishly. Now he's not talking to me at all. I apologised but he didn't respond. I want to talk to him but he's mad at me. What should I do to make him forgive me and restore our friendship? And why is he that much hurt?

[Jacob_Duluoz]

In short you can't. In the future, realize that blocking or de-friending someone like that means that you have no wish to have further communication with them. He was reluctant to go that far, but you did so without much consideration for his decision, he didn't respect your decision, he was forced to accept it. Be an adult and accept the consequence here, which that he no long wishes to be your friend because you treated him like he was disposable. In the future, my advice is to practice open communication and don't treat this like it's some theoretical exercise to be believed in rather than human emotion. You could quite literally show up at his doorstep half undressed and ready to go an he still wouldn't want you because there's no trust, lesson learned?

[Seneya]

In short you can't. In the future, realize that blocking or de-friending someone like that means that you have no wish to have further communication with them. He was reluctant to go that far, but you did so without much consideration for his decision, he didn't respect your decision, he was forced to accept it. Be an adult and accept the consequence here, which that he no long wishes to be your friend because you treated him like he was disposable. In the future, my advice is to practice open communication and don't treat this like it's some theoretical exercise to be believed in rather than human emotion. You could quite literally show up at his doorstep half undressed and ready to go an he still wouldn't want you because there's no trust, lesson learned?

 

Yeah lesson learned the harsh way!

But the thing was, I told him to block me at first but he didn't want to, instead he told me to block him and also asked to add him up again once I feel fine. It was never a goodbye forever from my side, I needed some time away from him. The question is when he told me to block him and when he asked to add him up again why is he being so hurt now? He knew I wouldn't leave him forever. Thanks for answering. I just hope he forgives me one day.

Edited May 3, 2017 by Seneya

[basil67]

General rule of thumb is that after you've had a relationship with someone, the couple can't go back to being friends. The friendship horse has bolted - he has become part of your past.

 

The whole blocking thing probably had little to do with him being absent now.

[Jacob_Duluoz]

Yeah lesson learned the harsh way!

But the thing was, I told him to block me at first but he didn't want to, instead he told me to block him and also asked to add him up again once I feel fine. It was never a goodbye forever from my side, I needed some time away from him. The question is when he told me to block him and when he asked to add him up again why is he being so hurt now? He knew I wouldn't leave him forever. Thanks for answering. I just hope he forgives me one day.

 

By the time it got to that point it was over already, but really what do you expect? Without more context it's hard to give advice. You're just going to have to accept he doesn't want any contact.