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me and her


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here we go.. me and this woman from the start got on very very well.. great even.. would be on the phone for hours.. every night.. was like routine.. 3 to 4 hours at a time.. she was like a female version of me and vice versa.. knew almost everything and our pasts about each other we was very comfy with each other and open.. we had a date.. meal then hers for coffee.. nothing more.. just chat.. it was great... time went by things was said.. she would say things like im to good to be true.. incredibly sweet etc.. id compliment on her too.. she is a amazing woman though.. not come across a woman like her and the way she made me laugh like she did.. and the banter too.. that was a bonus.. couple weeks ago her grandad died.. i support her.. with words on the phone or messages.. to show and let her know im there for her.. she was quiet for a couple of days due to her loss.. which was understandable.. it was valentines week that week.. i did it a day early on a friday has i forgot her house number so i sent flowers and chocolates to her work.. she loved it and said theres many jelous women at her work and it was the best thing anyone has done for her.. i was suprised myself about that.. came valentines day.. i saw her again which i didnt expect atall.. spent the night with her till sunday.. was snuggled and held hands all not has she was cold and some kisses in there too.. even while going to sleep it carried on too.. before all this she has told me what she wants.. in general and that someone and maybe more kids too.. we departed on that sunday.. i hugged her kissed her.. goin home i text her asking where we go from here.. because i didnt know.. she ignored that.. and just asked me how long it took to get home.. we was still fine through out the days messaging each other.. came to monday.. all i had was a message saying morning.. i replied a few times that day and didnt hear nothing back.. my messages wasnt even read.. tuesday i did another method of messaging to her via text and not messaging app.. i had a message cut short... shes not ready for a relationship and shes not there at the moment.. to be i thought in the mind or head has in the moment she aint there.. grandads passing maybe? but being distant and how good we were at the weekend got my mind in over drive.. did i do anything or didnt do anything wrong.. i needed a answer or two.. but when she told me about not ready for a relationship and after when i knew different from her mouth.. its two different answers there alone.. i was all this over the weeks.. she was very keen for sure.. met a few times.. phone calls all the time.. all this time we was close she didnt once be on dating sites.. for least a month.. and now she is and has we speak.. before anyone says.. are u on there.. no im not.. still can see things with out being a member.. just cant talk to no one etc.. weve been talking the last few days.. not much but its summat... i do miss the laughs. banter and how we were.. just dont know what went wrong.. grandads funeral is in a few days time.. maybe wait till thats over things might be different? but im sure she knows what shes doing and if she wanted us the way we were then she would do.. i did her a poem few days ago.. been years since iv done a poem.. but i did one.. even if she will never see it or hear it.. when she goes out with mates work mates i leave her to it.. dont keep messagin her or anything.. still dont now.. little contact is still there which im greatful with that.. just miss the rest.. if we was close once im sure that can happen again? thanks

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Sorry to hear you are going through this, I have been in a similar situation myself in the past and I know how horrible it feels.

 

The best advice I can give you is to cool off. Text her if she texts you but keep it brief. The last thing you want to do is come across as needy because that is enough to turn anyone off. Let her know you are there for her if she wants to talk but don't ask to see her. Act cool and calm (even if you don't feel it) and if she is interested she will come back to you. Good luck.

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sucks dont it.. had long term relationships that aint affected me like she does.. like anyone else would and does.. look at your phone every 5 mins.. worse when you know messages are not read on purpose. messaged each other a fair few times yesterday.. it was nice.. i kept it cool. asked how she was this morning.. she was ok and going gym etc.. i said to enjoy.. no read to it.. recently messaged night.. no read.. but i know shes around.. keeping convos normal no pressure or anything.. before we ever met.. she says on the phone.. if she didnt like me she would say there and then.. but she never told me different either.. but we met since then.. but still no answers to know where i stand.. even for friends i cant get a answer for.. so secretly is she torn what she wants? cause she cant answer.. get no answers then your left to wonder aint ya.. is it all mind games lol.. really just dont know..

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It's very painful Stee, but if you chase her you will lose her forever, believe me. You are probably wondering what you did wrong, but the chances are you have done nothing wrong. She is probably just confused and is still getting over the loss of her grandfather. I know it hurts but you must stay calm and stop texting her. She knows you are interested, let her come after you. Give her space. Keep yourself busy, be unavailable, and if she is interested she will come back to you when she is ready. I hope it works out for you.

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wise words and your right.. i havent done anything your right there.. loved up weekend then after that wanting to know where we stand.. cause valentines weekend was like how couples are.. thats why i wanted to know where we stood.. have a title for us both.. so asking that i think thats whats done it.. but she aint hasnt told me to do one either.. but me thinking she might be looking else where too..

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