Tiger073 Posted January 3, 2009 Share Posted January 3, 2009 There's this girl that I worked with for 2 years and got to know pretty well. We hung out a lot, saw a lot of movies, went out for drinks, etc. The weird thing is, she's older than I am by about 5-6 years, and while she's well into the working world and has finished grad school, I have just finished college. I really like this girl, or at least I feel there's some real connection there, but at the same time, I'm afraid to make a move or really express how I feel. I sort of get the feeling that she likes me too, but at the same time, I guessing that since she's older she's looking for someone permanent and/or feels awkward about the age difference. I'd have no problem being up for something serious, but I'm afraid that no matter what I say I'll wind up a) making things really awkward and ruining the good friendship b) not being able to convince her that I would be able to keep/cultivate such a relationship I hung out with her on New Year's Eve and it seemed like things were going really well, but she was really drunk and although we had a lot of fun at the party we were at I didn't really feel that it was the right time to make a move. Maybe I screwed up by making that decision, maybe I didn't; I don't know. However, I really do need advice as to how to proceed from here, so anything you guys could offer would be appreciated. Thanks! Link to post Share on other sites
atwitsend Posted January 3, 2009 Share Posted January 3, 2009 Tiger be up front. A. I would write her a letter and read it to her. Word it something like this. We have been good friends for a couple of years now. And I can't tell you how much your friendship means to me. I have been extremely attracted to you for a while now but am worried that our friendship would suffer if we both didn't feel the same. So I wanted to put myself out there and let you know that if your feelings aren't the same as mine. I would want you to tell me up front and I won't pursue the subject any further. You and Your friendship mean the world to me and I would never do anything to jeopardize it. If A is successful. Move on to B B.Tell her that you wanted to make a move but because she drank to much you felt that it would be taking advantage of her. Not to mention if you were going to make a move you would want her knowing exactly what she was doing. Link to post Share on other sites
atwitsend Posted January 3, 2009 Share Posted January 3, 2009 Oh my wife is over 4 years older then me. And we have be married for 29 years. Link to post Share on other sites
neveragain2493 Posted January 3, 2009 Share Posted January 3, 2009 Age is all relative, in my opinion. In high school/college, 5 - 6 years is a huge difference. However, you are out of college, and you are an adult. So it shouldn't matter. I commend you on NOT making a move New Years Eve. That was a respectful move. Look over what you read. Simply tell her how you're feeling, and add that if she wants to stay friends, that will work, too. :] Link to post Share on other sites
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