olimits7 Posted February 22, 2007 Posted February 22, 2007 Hello, I was just wondering what people think is too many sexual partners for a man or women to have by the time they get married? I’ll post the range I think is an average before it’s too many; just my opinion: Men: 2-9 Women: 2-5 I was also just wondering what are some of the reasons why some people have such high number of sexual partners? Is it just because they like having sex, or does it go deeper than that. For example, self-esteem issues, issues growing up, etc…just wondering. Thank you, olimits7
tanbark813 Posted February 22, 2007 Posted February 22, 2007 I draw the line at one million. I was also just wondering what are some of the reasons why some people have such high number of sexual partners? Some of us are just f**kable.
Mythical Posted February 22, 2007 Posted February 22, 2007 Hello, I was just wondering what people think is too many sexual partners for a man or women to have by the time they get married? I’ll post the range I think is an average before it’s too many; just my opinion: Men: 2-9 Women: 2-5 I was also just wondering what are some of the reasons why some people have such high number of sexual partners? Is it just because they like having sex, or does it go deeper than that. For example, self-esteem issues, issues growing up, etc…just wondering. Thank you, olimits7 That's a pretty small average..but thats good Mime is way higher than that something I am definetly not proud of and im sure ppl could have higher numbers for various reasons There was a post similar to this if you want to see everyone's average even though I don't think ppl were too honest
Lauriebell82 Posted February 22, 2007 Posted February 22, 2007 i think it just depends on the person. some people meet the love of their life when they are 10 and only have one partner..others have like 20. guys who have been with more than like 8 girls is kind of a turn off for me. i think they may be either a player, or worse have some kind of STD or something. girls are a different story..some girls (like me) just dont sleep with any guy. they are more selective therefore have been with less people. girls who are little skanky hoes have been with more because they have one night stands. usually they just get swept up in the whole, "wow this guy really is into me thing". ur right probably a sign of low self-worth and low self-esteem. i dont think its about liking sex, i like sex, yet i've been with a very low number of men. i just dont sleep with every dude i meet. its safer and i can differentiate between the ones who actually care about me, and the ones who dont.
Star Gazer Posted February 22, 2007 Posted February 22, 2007 Number of partners before marriage? Well, 2-5 would be awfully low if you waited until you were 40 to get married. It's all relative. Some people are in back-to-back long-term relationships, others aren't. Some "wait," others hop right in. It depends on far too many factors which are inherently based on very personal decisions...
Krytellan Posted February 22, 2007 Posted February 22, 2007 Men: 2-9 Women: 2-5 Hmm... interesting... men are allowed more hmm? Why is that, because women are used up quicker than men? Shame on you... I have lived a relatively *cough* innocent life, and those numbers make me look like a sexual deviant. "Too many partners" is relative to your partner, but you should count on having a partner that has been with 8-15 people by the time you marry... just to be in the right frame of mind.
justagirlforever Posted February 22, 2007 Posted February 22, 2007 Hello, Women: 2-5 Well I'm screwed then! Because I'm way over the limit
LucreziaBorgia Posted February 22, 2007 Posted February 22, 2007 1. I was just wondering what people think is too many sexual partners for a man or women to have by the time they get married? 2. I was also just wondering what are some of the reasons why some people have such high number of sexual partners? Is it just because they like having sex, or does it go deeper than that. 1. I guess the question behind the question is: Are you asking for your own personal reasons, or are you asking about how many your partner will find acceptable? I think that people tend to have higher numbers than they divulge to their STBSpouses. No one wants to be seen as "slutty" or "easy" to the person they are getting ready to be married to, even if they don't see themselves as slutty or easy. 2. For some its about simply liking sex, and taking a hedonistic pleasure in many partners. For others, its a matter of being raised by parents who don't impose morality and punishment for sex. For some, its a self esteem issue - a need to feel accepted, or a need to feel powerful through sexual conquest. For some, its a simple matter of opportunity - serial monogamy, with many relationships. For others, its a job (prostitutes and porn stars). It all depends on the person, really. Just because a person has a large 'number' doesn't necessarily mean what you think. People tend to map their own experiences onto others in an attempt to explain things for themselves, so you'll have as many different reactions to a person's hypersexuality as the person has had sexual partners.
Crazy Eddie Posted February 22, 2007 Posted February 22, 2007 Hello, I was just wondering what people think is too many sexual partners for a man or women to have by the time they get married? As far as I can tell, more than two or three partners will tend to get in each other's way. Oh, you meant total, not all at once. I don't really see a reason for a hard-and-fast limit there. Circumstances differ so much. One person can luck into a long-term relationship, while another must turn to a varying assortment of casual partners before finding someone worth settling down with. I'd be much more interested in (a) STD status and (b) general behavior and disposition. If they're dependable, affectionate, trustworthy, and completely lacking in communicable diseases, I wouldn't let any number of past sexual partners be a dealbreaker. Now if she had a "wild and crazy" past, and had a stick up her ass while she was with me, I'd be pissed.
GoldPenny Posted February 22, 2007 Posted February 22, 2007 I'm a bit surprised at the OP's low-ish average guesses, but it is refreshing, I was almost expecting some more massive numbers like 15-20 or something. I wouldn't say there is any for me, not just because he/she could've been a successful porn star (and a very clean one at that) but as long as they're thoroughly screened with a clear STD/I/V background. OH, wait, this is coming from someone who's not into marriage and committed relationships.
Star Gazer Posted February 22, 2007 Posted February 22, 2007 I have lived a relatively *cough* innocent life, and those numbers make me look like a sexual deviant. Me too!!!!!!
Art_Critic Posted February 22, 2007 Posted February 22, 2007 massive numbers like 15-20 or something. .. 15-20 is massive ??
confucious Posted February 22, 2007 Posted February 22, 2007 I personally don't care - I mean, literally! I would rather NOT know how many they've slept with - it has no bearing on the relationship. I make it clear, when that kind of talk begins, that I am not interested in they're past sexual history (apart from anecdotes, etc.) and that I won't talk about mine as, bluntly, it's none of thier business (this is NOT the wording I use...heheh). If I slept with 14 girls when I was 15 and 22 between 16 and 20, and now I am 28 and have slept with 2 since - does this number of 38 have any bearing on my life...on who I am? And yes - the numbers are purely fictional - I had the most wonderful, beautiful, kind and sincere GF during my teen years - she still is all those things, though we talk rarely.
IpAncA Posted February 22, 2007 Posted February 22, 2007 I think it's going to depend on what each person considers a lot. Don't think it would be fair to base the relationship off of the numbers though.
Pyro Posted February 22, 2007 Posted February 22, 2007 I think it's going to depend on what each person considers a lot. Don't think it would be fair to base the relationship off of the numbers though. Agreed, but I wouldn't doubt that many will base a relationship off the number, which is part of the reason why no one ever wants to discuss their pasts with anyone, which I think shouldn't be talked about to begin with.
IpAncA Posted February 22, 2007 Posted February 22, 2007 Agreed, but I wouldn't doubt that many will base a relationship off the number, which is part of the reason why no one ever wants to discuss their pasts with anyone, which I think shouldn't be talked about to begin with. No it's generally not something I talk about. Best to leave the past alone.
Pyro Posted February 22, 2007 Posted February 22, 2007 No it's generally not something I talk about. Best to leave the past alone. A few skeletons in the closet I take it? Thats alright, you can share with us. Don't be shy.
GoldPenny Posted February 22, 2007 Posted February 22, 2007 .. 15-20 is massive ?? I'm thinking if they marry young, like early-mid twenties, and if it's still not massive to you, great.
IpAncA Posted February 23, 2007 Posted February 23, 2007 A few skeletons in the closet I take it? Thats alright, you can share with us. Don't be shy. A few? How many you think I've been with?
Pyro Posted February 23, 2007 Posted February 23, 2007 A few? How many you think I've been with? I wasn't just limiting it to number of sexual partners.
Trialbyfire Posted February 23, 2007 Posted February 23, 2007 Hello, I was just wondering what people think is too many sexual partners for a man or women to have by the time they get married? olimits7 I think this depends on the individual. If they're happy having a large number of partners, it's their life. STDs are a real concern, even if you use condoms. This and disposition would be my concern for hooking up with someone who's had many partners. I've dated a lot but have only had two partners in my life, including my marriage. You can do the math about how many I had previous to marriage.
jusified Posted February 23, 2007 Posted February 23, 2007 I'm 21 and I think its up to individuals. I mean for me personally i rather have as low as possible but it doesn't mean I think the other girls are Sl*tty, well if it was really high lol. If i had to put a number on it then i agree with the original poster.
Pretty Fly Posted February 23, 2007 Posted February 23, 2007 guys who have been with more than like 8 girls is kind of a turn off for me. i think they may be either a player, or worse have some kind of STD or something. !!!!! I'm 28, my number is higher than 8, but on average is just above about 1 partner per year since I lost my virginity. Hardly a player statistic!!!
IpAncA Posted February 23, 2007 Posted February 23, 2007 I wasn't just limiting it to number of sexual partners. Well then....yes I do.
ash519 Posted February 23, 2007 Posted February 23, 2007 It really is all relative...See, i am almost 25 years old and I have been with 18 people. I know, a lot...but I am in my first long term relationship (almost 2 years and counting). I have a few friends, my age and younger who have been with 14+ people and since they were 15 have pretty much been in long term relationships except for a few months here and there. Whats my point...well, i have had a lot of free time on my hands and have dated around a lot and sometimes things went a bit too far. I do regret a few but it's all on my past now. I have never had a STD and have been getting screened every year. My bf is almost 29, he has been with 30 people. I know, that sounds bad too, but he has had years of singleness as well, along with long term. He has been having sex for over 10 years, and me for 8. I guess to me, number doesnt really matter. I would date anyone who has had less than lets say...50 partners, but to be honest with you, I dont really want to know. Only reason I know my bf's is because he told me when we were friends, he still doesnt know my actual number...I just said less than 20.
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