UGHdating Posted February 22, 2007 Posted February 22, 2007 FYI - this is more of a vent - My heart is broken and I need to let it out. ITs offical the Player, played me a fool. All of you were all so kind to give me advice and warned me to stay away but I stupidly and ultimately went for it. Of course when I finally told him the real deal, he of course rejected me by saying he's not looking for a realationship. Well that made the descion easier to end it. RIGHT? And I told him that. HOWEVER what sucked about the whole thing right after I told him we couldnt date anymore but just be friends; actually this was the day after this - I found out the entire time that when we were so called dating - he was really playing me for a fool, and also dating a friend / coworker of mine. He didn't know we were friends...and one weekend when she came over to visit me, the whole story came out and everything made sense how he was acting towards me and why he acted on certain things and vice versa for him. UGH it was a mess - she was all crying in my apartment about the situation and i was heated and just wanted to do some major damage to him for playing both of us like fools, so I of course called him to ask him "WHAT THE BEEP!" And he kept saying to me on the phone, everything I told you was true, everything. I told you I didn't want a relationship - (Okay what kind of lame excuse is that!)....the next day however I felt sick to my stomach about the whole thing. The good thing about this is that it brought my cowoker and I closer together. Luckily for her though she had just started to date him in DEC and have not slept with him. I unfortuntely have been dating him since Sept and have slept with him - stupid move on my part. athough I couldnt help but feel jealous when she was telling me the stories about him and her. And when he and found out about the whole thing, well he had called her first. And textd her like crazy...as for me..well he only called me once - which I had given him the cold shoulder. IT definitely seemd that he like her more - not that really matters. it just hurts. AND damn it hurts alot. I guess I was in denial about how much I really like him, because when all the drama came out, I was really hurt, My heart really ached. And of course I still have to work with him. And of course its easier for My coworker to distance her from him as she works on another floor, I unfortantely work on the same floor and My office is right next door to him. This is why you dont poop where you eat. UGH. And dispite all this I Still freakin long for him, or at least his attention. And because we are in the same dept we are in the same meetings and stuff and its sooo freakin awkward. I just wish I can get this feeling to go away, I wish I can stop longing after him and stop this akwardness. *SIGH* My heart hurts and damn it sucks. Thanks for letting me vent.
Trialbyfire Posted February 22, 2007 Posted February 22, 2007 I'm sorry that things ended up this way. I swear that players are emotionally crippled, where they have zero empathy, with only selfish concern for their own pleasure.
Walk Posted February 22, 2007 Posted February 22, 2007 I don't know if this is any consolation or not.... But I've realized over the years that "players" usually feel pretty damn guilty about their actions. Or at least, know what they did was not right. I bet he'll do his damndest to avoid you from now on. He'll nearly shun you. But don't take it personally. he hates himself, not you. You did nothing wrong. The only person he's really running from is himself. So if every time you get in sight of him, he bolts, that's why. It's not you. He isn't mature enough to have a relationship with any one. Most the players I know, were the type that felt deep down inside that they were worthless. They'd use everything they could to keep that distance, to protect their heart. Like having a "back up girl" so if one left, they always had another to bolster their non-existent self-esteem with. You're a good person. This guy just hides his pathetic immature self from others really well. It'll hurt for a while, but you must have gotten something good from the experience? Even for just a little while? You lived life, and that's a very noble thing. Don't use this as an excuse to hide from life (or relationships) in the future. You know that you're someone special, and that people do like and love you. This guy isn't capable of what you needed, but there are others out there who would die for a chance to be with someone like you. Keep reminding yourself of that. And when you see this guy again. Square your shoulders, keep your head up, give him eye contact and watch him scurry away.
Recommended Posts