unkeptsecret23 Posted February 22, 2007 Posted February 22, 2007 I have been with my new boyfriend for a little over a month. We have already gotten really close. I have stayed every night at his house for the past 2 or 3 weeks. But he recently has bought a new house and has been in the process of paperwork, moving, packing, settling in etc. I have offered help but he said that I distract him and he needs to focus. he says that he will call me when he gets a chance and that I shouldnt expect to stay the night for awhile b/c he has a lot to get done still. I am absolutely smitten by him, we have already said that we love each other and although he continues to say it, I feel like I am being shunned away. I have gotten so close to him the past month and now having to take a step down kind of hurts me. I dont know what to do with the time I have now. I know he's stressed and things will probably be ok once he's settled back in. But how do I reassure myself. Another factor on top of all this is that we are 10 years apart. We REALLY seem to click perfectly until this situation. He moved in yesterday but is still in the process of getting everything out of the old house and getting everything in place in the new house. HAS ANYONE EVER GONE THROUGH THIS TYPE OF THING?! I know he needs time but how do I give it to him without wanting to be with him so bad?!
Guest Posted March 9, 2007 Posted March 9, 2007 I think in my opinion you shouldn't be so attached to him, as he will probably see it as co-dependency or neediness. A healthy relationship means setting boundaries, and besides sometimes such intense emotions can drive the person away... but then I'm no expert.
Lauriebell82 Posted March 9, 2007 Posted March 9, 2007 he may feel overwhelmed with how fast the relationship is moving. spending the night that much together when u first get intoa relationship is great, but often guys get freaked out that they have this bigtime relationship and need some space. so give it to him. honestly i know its hard to take a step back like that, but ur gonna have to if u dont want to drive him away. give him space and let him chase u a little bit. dont seem too available, keep urself busy. have other things in ur life besides ur bf. guys dont like when women are too reliant, because they feel trapped. so hang back and tell him u understand that u cant stay over. give him room to breath and he'll come back believe me.
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