EnigmasMuse Posted February 21, 2007 Posted February 21, 2007 Which do you do? A friend or family memeber does something or says something to hurt you or make you mad. Lets say its not intentional, but you take it that way, what do you do? A. Ask the person exactly what it was they meant by what they did or said. Because you want to make sure you're not assuming or blowing something out of proportion that you shouldn't. Its only right that they get a chance to explain. B. You do not give them a chance to explain, you just lay into them without hearing their side, because you have decided you are correct in your thinking on the matter. C. You let it go, and don't say anything at all, and pretend all is well, even though you are hurt or mad. D. You completley drop them from your life, because you feel your feelings are validated just by how YOU feel, even without finding out for sure what the other person meant. I would choose A. I'm the type of person who feels, that if I'm not clear on something and even if I thought I were, I would ask the other person exactly what they meant by what they had done or said. I know we all have been guilty of assuming before, but I try not to do that if I can help. I would rather know for certain of how something is than to just act like I know or am correct when I might be way off base. It would be a real shame to be mad or hurt over something and not really know for sure why. Before someone asks, no I'm not wondering for a particular reason, I'm just asking because since I have not been here that long, I just wanted to kind of get to know others and see how one might handle different things.
Ripples Posted February 21, 2007 Posted February 21, 2007 A. with the addition of explaining that what they'd said or done had hurt me. Ok, that's what I'd like to do. What I'd actually do would depend on specifically what had been said/done, who was involved and if I had PMT or not.
Author EnigmasMuse Posted February 21, 2007 Author Posted February 21, 2007 What I'd actually do would depend on specifically what had been said/done, who was involved and if I had PMT or not. Thats true too.
JackJack Posted February 21, 2007 Posted February 21, 2007 I would say A for me. Why go around in life in a huff over something you do not completley know for sure? I think communicating is the best way to be.
ash519 Posted February 21, 2007 Posted February 21, 2007 Well, i would love to say A...and it is what i try to do, but I do a whole lot of C too...i drop things. One time one of my best friends was very upset her ex was seeing someone new...well, she described this girl as follows "She's wicked skinny and has no body, no offense." No offense??? Why would you say that. Are you saying i am skinny and have no body, I do. I am thin, always have been but i have a cute butt and well, i am small breasted but still!!! Who says that. That's like me saying "Yeah, this girl got really chunky in the middle and had bad teeth, no offense." BUT in the end i dropped it, my reply when she said it was " I have no reason to take offense to that." My brother says some really inconsiderate things too and i just turn around, call a friend and bitch about it. I am going to change that. I, from now on, will speak up, give them a chance to explain, and if there explanation suck I will tell them what i think! Good plan, i have enough stress and holding that in doesnt help much. I definately tell my bf what i think. hmm...good thread
Star Gazer Posted February 21, 2007 Posted February 21, 2007 None-of-the-above. "What the he!! is that supposed to mean?" - that's generally what would (and does) come out of my mouth.
Art_Critic Posted February 21, 2007 Posted February 21, 2007 A of course.. But sometimes A will lead to a combo of A then B and then of course as with one of my sisters and her husband ( over settling an estate ) A lead to B then C back to B and then to D... in short order..
PandorasBox Posted February 21, 2007 Posted February 21, 2007 I pick A also. Although I have done C before, only for it to come back and bite me in the ass later, because I should have said something earlier on. I try to address problems as they arise if I can. I know some people who do D, and it was something I never could understand. The only thing I know of is, they do not want to know or further learn what or why the way something was/is.
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