Cupcake Posted February 19, 2007 Posted February 19, 2007 I work for a travel company. I meet a lot of men. One man in particular, I've spent several months building a repoir with him. All of my co-workers like him and have encouraged me to date him. They claim to see a "chemistry" between he and I. So I decided to give him a chance. He is a nice guy. A few months ago, we exchanged numbers and began calling each other at home. He sometimes ask me why I don't call him more often. He told me I can call him "anytime." We haven't been on a date yet. But we've talked about places we'd like to go together. He never mentioned another woman in his life, except his mother and sisters, for which he assured me I would meet someday. Yesturday, he didn't stop by to see me the way he usually does every week. And he didn't call to tell me where he was. I checked his flight reservations and noticed that his flight had been canceled and rerouted. But I also noticed in his profile that he has a future reservation booked for a trip to Jamaica in July with a woman. Her last name isn't the same as his so I don't think it's a wife. But they will be traveling first class and staying on the island for a week. Whoever she is, his relationship with her must be serious since the reservation was created so far in advance. And it was just made, by him, two weeks ago. So I keep asking myself why is he starting a relationship with me. Why is he wasting my time?
Author Cupcake Posted February 19, 2007 Author Posted February 19, 2007 I met him at work during the Super Bowl. We had a company party. Me and this guy hit it off really well. He wasn't there with anyone. Neither was I. We exchanged numbers and have been in contact. It was really exciting and happy. He's been asking my friends and co-workers about me. They are giddy and have been saying good things about him. It's a bit like high school stuff, except we're all adults. But it's fun and felt good. Today, I met one of his friends and asked about him. That friend was surprised I was interested and told me that the guy has a girlfriend whom he has been dating for a few years. The friend was annoyed to find out that the guy was obviously cheating on his girlfriend. The guy came over to visit me today and I asked about his girlfriend. He admitted it, but said the relationship is not as serious as people think. Now he's disappointed that I no longer want to be involved with him. I am soooo tired of this!!!
Green Posted February 19, 2007 Posted February 19, 2007 Say what the saga continues eh.. oh well u win some u lose some time to move onto D bigger and better things eh
norajane Posted February 19, 2007 Posted February 19, 2007 Because some men are actually still little boys, and want to grab as many toys as they can, only to break them or tire of them, and go seeking new ones. Who knows? Maybe they had no good role models, and never learned a damned thing about loyalty, honor, and common decency. They all wanna be rock stars, rap stars, and sports stars so they can attract chicks and get lots of booty.
Trialbyfire Posted February 19, 2007 Posted February 19, 2007 I hear you about little boys and their desire for more toys. The upside is that you found out before you went any further. Be grateful to whomever was looking out for you. Lucky you and I mean that sincerely.
Island Girl Posted February 19, 2007 Posted February 19, 2007 I hear you about little boys and their desire for more toys. The upside is that you found out before you went any further. Be grateful to whomever was looking out for you. Lucky you and I mean that sincerely. I second that. Thank whoever helped you not get in way too deep before knowing. There are so many guys out there - now you know to move on and find one who is worthy of you.
Star Gazer Posted February 19, 2007 Posted February 19, 2007 We haven't been on a date yet. So I keep asking myself why is he starting a relationship with me. No date = starting a relationship?? Huh?
Can of Pencils Posted February 19, 2007 Posted February 19, 2007 But I also noticed in his profile that he has a future reservation booked for a trip to Jamaica in July with a woman. Her last name isn't the same as his so I don't think it's a wife. But they will be traveling first class and staying on the island for a week. Whoever she is, his relationship with her must be serious since the reservation was created so far in advance. And it was just made, by him, two weeks ago. So I keep asking myself why is he starting a relationship with me. Why is he wasting my time? Have you asked him about it? Did you ask who she was, or did you just make assumptions about him having a relationship with her, and let that be that? Or are you afraid to ask because of the whole, "haven't been on a date" thing? You said you've known him for months, you'd figure ya'll would've been on a date by now if you were interested in each other.
Sand&Water Posted February 19, 2007 Posted February 19, 2007 RE: Why is he wasting my time? I don't think he is wasting your time. You're not dating each other -not yet, anyways. He hasn't asked you for a relationship, intimacy either. He can do whatever he wants. So, does it matter if he's going to go on a trip with a woman. IF you really like him, get to know him a bit more. Ask him out for coffee/date, IF you want. Otherwise, if you don't like his tactics then find someone else. Perhaps if you stop brutally thinking in this fashion, and go with the flow, you may find yourself a keeper -a true man in some regards. Sand&Water
hindsfeet Posted February 19, 2007 Posted February 19, 2007 could be a ton of things. possibly they are dogs. possible that they are not. if i am not in a relationship, i do things with friends of mine a lot. road trips included. could be something, could be nothing. wait it out, but be safe. dont come across as a stalker who checks out someone's schedule all the time. but see if he tells you anything at all. the other guy could be having problems with his girl. obviously if hes at a party by himself, and askin other women about you. no one airs their dirty laundry for others to see. my neighbors were broke up and dating other people for about 3 months before i noticed anything different with them. of course im never home though. but what i mean is no one likes for people to know bad stuff going on so its not talked about a lot. chances are though that they are just being dogs.
LucreziaBorgia Posted February 19, 2007 Posted February 19, 2007 1. That friend was surprised I was interested and told me that the guy has a girlfriend whom he has been dating for a few years. 2. The guy came over to visit me today and I asked about his girlfriend. He admitted it, but said the relationship is not as serious as people think. 3. Now he's disappointed that I no longer want to be involved with him. 1. This should be your reason for x-ing this guy out of your datebook, and not talking to him again. 2. I'm sure his girlfriend would have a different story. You don't date someone for a "few years" and not have it be serious on some level. If he is willing to call his girlfriend in front of you and tell her that he is going to be taking you out on dates, etc. that would be one thing. My guess is that he would rather chew off his own arm than have his girlfriend find out about you. 3. Of course! What guy wouldn't be disappointed about being turned down by someone he is interested in. The problem is, is that he is already involved with someone else. If you want to date this guy, let him know that you are interested but that as long as he has a girlfriend not to contact you in any way, shape or form. That should send a pretty clear message: you will be the 'only woman' and will never settle for being the 'other woman'.
hardknocks Posted February 19, 2007 Posted February 19, 2007 Just for the record.. women do this kind of crap too.
Trialbyfire Posted February 19, 2007 Posted February 19, 2007 Just for the record.. women do this kind of crap too. Very true. I sincerely doubt it's isolated to men only. The difference is that men tend to do the pursuing therefore it's more in the limelight, although this is changing as society evolves.
alphamale Posted February 19, 2007 Posted February 19, 2007 I checked his flight reservations and noticed that his flight had been canceled and rerouted. what airline? JetBlue?
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