Fortune'sFool Posted February 14, 2007 Posted February 14, 2007 I am having a really bad day... I feel like my MM has completly played with my heart and my head... To make a long story short, my best friends husband and I are friends... nothing more just friends... My best friend doesnt have a problem with her husband calling me and talking to me... but MM sure does.. he is convince that we have something planned.. and that I talk to him on regular basis.. But that is entirely not true.. MM even went so far as to tell him NEVER speak to me again.. Last night her husband called me and MM was over, he called because my best friend's b-day is on valentines day.. He wanted her present to be a surprise and asked me to call her and find out what she wanted. so i did, and called him back to tell him, well before i hung up he asked me how i was and i proceeded to answer.. MM tried to listen in, but i thought that was rude so i pulled the phone away,... he flipped out and started calling me a "ho" and saying "I knew it"... my best friend's husband just hung up at that point. Mean while MM is starting to leave because he is pissed off ...i tell him, "that's right, run home to wifey"... he said... "i'll be back" He came back and said he was sorry, then were starting to make up .. and about 1/2 an hour into it.... he tells me that he can't "do it" because now his mind is all messed up because he is positive there is something go on between us... for the fact that i pulled the phone away.. I tried reassuring him, but was upset because why did he chose at that point to be mr. sensitive? FYI i have NEVER been an unfaithful person, I have not been with anyone else in the 3 years we have been together.. so why would he do this to me? Is he trying to pull some sort of power trip over me? This has really made a mess of my mind and i am very confused and hurt by his actions not to mention his accusations... ..
Salicious Crumb Posted February 14, 2007 Posted February 14, 2007 I am having a really bad day... I feel like my MM has completly played with my heart and my head... he is married and cheating on his wife....does this surprise you?
whichwayisup Posted February 14, 2007 Posted February 14, 2007 Look at it this way - The guy is MARRIED and has a wife. He has no right to be jealous or upset. 3 years is a long time to be the OW - You're missing out in life being his OW. I hope soon you realize that you deserve to be happy with a single man who can love ONLY you and not have to share another woman's husband. Tell him to deal with it. You deal with him being with his wife, he can deal with you being friends with your bestfriends husband. If he can't handle that, BREAK up with him.
YoMomma Posted February 14, 2007 Posted February 14, 2007 I am having a really bad day... I feel like my MM has completly played with my heart and my head... FYI i have NEVER been an unfaithful person, I have not been with anyone else in the 3 years we have been together.. so why would he do this to me? Is he trying to pull some sort of power trip over me? This has really made a mess of my mind and i am very confused and hurt by his actions not to mention his accusations... You have a child with a MM - yet you say you've never been unfaithful? Pluzzzzzzzzzze, this man is playing you for the biggest fool. What right does he have to tell you anything?
Author Fortune'sFool Posted February 15, 2007 Author Posted February 15, 2007 <You have a child with a MM - yet you say you've never been unfaithful?> I dont really understand what you mean by this? MM that i posted about is the father of my daughter... so yes i have not been unfaithful.. HE may be.. but not.. me..
LucreziaBorgia Posted February 15, 2007 Posted February 15, 2007 my best friends husband and I are friends... Did you start your R with your MM under this same pretense? Maybe he is afraid that this friendship is something more along the lines of "potential hookup". After all, you did it with him - in his mind, he may not see any reason why you wouldn't do it with someone else's husband as well.
Island Girl Posted February 15, 2007 Posted February 15, 2007 FYI i have NEVER been an unfaithful person' date=' I have not been with anyone else in the 3 years we have been together.. so why would he do this to me? Is he trying to pull some sort of power trip over me? [/quote'] FYI - You state you have never been unfaithful to him -- as if that is some kind of honorable thing. You do realize he has had someone else - a WIFE - at home the entire time so he gets his cake and gets to eat it too and you are PROUD of taking scraps and crumbs for 3 years?!! You are somehow proud of yourself that you do not want more for yourself? "Look what a sacrifice I make to be with you"?! Is that it? You really need some help on perspective. And you ask WHY he would do this? -- Hmmmmm. That is SO DIFFICULT. Let's think for a minute...could it possibly be because he knows someone else could definitely give you just as much as he can (which is very little), AND that you are having an affair with him and HE'S married - so what is there to stop you? Certainly not a respect for the institution of marriage. He knows you lack self-esteem and has prayed on this fact for years to be able to have you take second and like it. Is it so far fetched that you could make a lateral move and be treated as second best from someone else? These are the reasons he probably feels "threatened". Should you address it with him. I wouldn't. Should you make him feel better about it. I wouldn't. Should you use this opportunity to think about the fact that he has holidays, birthdays, and anniversarys booked with someone else while you are alone? I would. Should you stop and see him in a different light - a hypocritical cake eater who is completely satiated while you go on with needs unfulfilled? I would. Should this cause you look at how selfishly full his life is and the emptiness in yours (that he is completely aware of) and demand more for yourself? I would. But then again - I will not be with someone and make them number one and only unless I am number one AND ONLY.
pjean Posted February 15, 2007 Posted February 15, 2007 Did you start your R with your MM under this same pretense? Maybe he is afraid that this friendship is something more along the lines of "potential hookup". After all, you did it with him - in his mind, he may not see any reason why you wouldn't do it with someone else's husband as well. LB PLEASE CONTACT ME THROUGH PRIVATE MAIL ASAP IT IS URGENT I SPEAK TO YOU!
LucreziaBorgia Posted February 15, 2007 Posted February 15, 2007 Sorry to threadjack, but I have no other way to respond except here on this thread ... LB PLEASE CONTACT ME THROUGH PRIVATE MAIL ASAP IT IS URGENT I SPEAK TO YOU! I'm not sure how to contact you. I checked your profile, and you don't have the PM function yet. Posting your private email address here also would not be a good idea. Not sure how you want to do this.
kymberann Posted February 15, 2007 Posted February 15, 2007 You don't need this! He has no right to dictate who you can and cannot be with. Or be friends with. He is in no position to tell you what you can and cannot do! He has no place to be jealous about any body in your life! He is toying with your mind in order to kep power and control over something he should not have in the first place! Take it back! Best!
puddleofmud Posted February 15, 2007 Posted February 15, 2007 There is a saying that "persons with 'duplictitous natures' are ones who expect duplicity" It may not matter if you are "faithful". "His" behavior is that one is not faithful and that is what he has internalized and come to expect. In short: he is processing YOU from his own crap. Though it isn't at all fair, it may be his reality as opposed to yours.
NoIDidn't Posted February 15, 2007 Posted February 15, 2007 There is a saying that "persons with 'duplictitous natures' are ones who expect duplicity" It may not matter if you are "faithful". "His" behavior is that one is not faithful and that is what he has internalized and come to expect. In short: he is processing YOU from his own crap. Though it isn't at all fair, it may be his reality as opposed to yours. puddle said it differently, but that's exactly what I was thinking. This guy is cheating and figures if you are doing it with him, then you are just like him. KWIM? Your friend, the other married guy who's married to your best friend, looks like competition to him because to him, you have a thing for married men. How old is your daughter?
Author Fortune'sFool Posted February 15, 2007 Author Posted February 15, 2007 Thank you for your input.. It makes me feel much better knowing that I am not the only one that thinks he is full of it.. and that he is way out of line.. <How old is your daughter?> My daughter, Anna, is almost 11 months old... she was born on St Patrick's Day
Recommended Posts