luvncurls Posted February 14, 2007 Posted February 14, 2007 I am at my wits end and have always found help here. My grandmother has had cancer for the past 4 months and is so far advanced that she is dying. She raised me, so needless to say I am an emotional basketcase. I cry all the time and am feeling miserable and vulnerable. My emotions run from anger to sadness and always end up in tears because I am losing one of the most important people in my life.ALSO, the guy that I have dating for 6 months and I broke up. We spoke, I cried alot, he said that he would get back to me because we've been together for 6 months and he can't bring himself to call himself my boyfriend and he isn't very affectionate. He said that he needed a week to think about it and he would get back to me. I just need some words of advice, I desperately am in need of love and understanding and just someone to tell me that things are going to be ok, but I can't get that from him. My friends are wonderful, but it's good to hear from a man who cares about you. However, at this rate, I am losing two people, one who has loved me all of my life and one who I want to love me. Any advice on how to deal is appreciated.
MotherGooze Posted February 14, 2007 Posted February 14, 2007 I'm so sorry to hear this. I'm sure it must be very hard and I wish you all the strenght and support in this difficult period. I know you really want to be with your boyfriend at a difficult time like this, but you can't force him. I suggest relying on your friends for support and focus on your grandmother. Try and be there for her during this hard time. Don't sit around and wait for him. I think it's awful that he just left you in a time like this. Find support friom people who really care for you. I don't think he's a good bf for you. Someone who loves you would never leave you alone at a time like this. Maybe that's not what you want to hear right now, but I'm just being honest. I wish you all the best. Don't worry you won't be alone on this, like you said you're friends support you.
Author luvncurls Posted February 14, 2007 Author Posted February 14, 2007 to his benefit I was the one who broke up with him. he said he didn't want to break up with me until everything with my grandmother was over, but I am not sure that will be any better. At that point I will just be all that more attached to him and in love. He couldn't tell me he felt the same, so I just said that I couldn't anymore. He told me not to worry, that he would get back to me in a week. I feel guilty too, about spending so much time on stupid things when I should be thinking about my grandma.
MotherGooze Posted February 14, 2007 Posted February 14, 2007 It's not your fault. Maybe it's for the best you're on a break right now. She'll understand that you're now having a hard time. I'm very sure she realises that. I think she wouldn't want you to be worried to much. I rememeber that's how it was when my mother in law had cancer. She was like a mother to me. Try and be there for her, but not being too worried. She'll be happy if you'd just be there like you always are. Is she able to talk? Why don't you talk about memories and fun stuff that has happened. I know it'll be painful for you but it'll be good for her. That way you can say goodbye to her and she to you. I know it'll be hard to let her go. I know cause I have felt that pain. BUt at least you can still be there for her now and say goodbye. Keep those found memories in your heart.
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