RocketMan2 Posted February 13, 2007 Posted February 13, 2007 Hey all Some good news for once, I can tell that in this past week I've been feeling a little bit better Nowhere near healed yet tho. I know what my next objective is though, I need to prepare myself for contact with her. Its going to happen one way or another, and in my current mindset I'd have a breakdown and be back to 6 weeks ago So, how do I prepare myself? Im not prepared to let all this hard work goto waste because she decides she hasnt moaned at me for a while, or I see her in the street or something. I don't know if im feeling better because im over it, or because ive just blocked it out... I think its the latter, which scares me because im still not in control :s Any advice guys? Thanks Rocket
shockandawed Posted February 13, 2007 Posted February 13, 2007 Rocket, I think you are preparing yourself for that. I wouldn't worry about how you will act. It may be quite a while off. I think each day that passes, you are getting closer to being able to handle it. If it happens today, it will be hard, if it happens in two months, you may not care at all. Just keep focusing on yourself and healing. I think you might be surprised how well you could handle it down the road.
Author RocketMan2 Posted February 13, 2007 Author Posted February 13, 2007 Nah, its gonna be soon, i can feel it lol. Had my first appt. with the counsellor last night, it went well! Didnt really do much apart from retell the story ive told so many times, but she seemed very interested and caring Woo, we're both 'established' members Rocket
shockandawed Posted February 13, 2007 Posted February 13, 2007 Woo, we're both 'established' members Rocket Not sure what that means? Maybe it means we need to get over ourselves, lol!!! How did that nurse thing work out?
jefeco99 Posted February 13, 2007 Posted February 13, 2007 Try to stay on this emotional high that you are on. I remember countless times were I woke up thinking "today is the day". But then I get a phone call or I find something of hers and I relapse. The best thing to do when you see her again is to let her know how well your life is without her. For two reasons, 1) She will see that you don't need her and it makes her wonder why, and 2) Because its true.
guin_girl Posted February 13, 2007 Posted February 13, 2007 RM2... your title cracked me up!! I'm glad to hear that you are feeling a little better. I know about the contact preparation. I have an event that I am attending at the end of the month and I know for a fact he will be there. I have to figure out how I want it to play out. Fortunately (or unfortunately), I will be with a group of friends, who are also his friends, and I need to be the bigger person and not be a chicken$h*t like he was. But then again, I have a feeling he will steer clear of us, because he is a chicken$h*t .
polywog Posted February 13, 2007 Posted February 13, 2007 I laffed at the title of this thread, too:lmao: Keep the contact minimal, be cheerful but distant even if you have to fake it, and don't ask her Anything about her life. DO NOT approach her first, let her be the first to speak. Be cagey if/when she asks you any questions, make her wonder what you're doing and feel like an a**hole for dumping you. Pull out your cellphone and check messages, even if you have to pretend, and say "excuse me I have to meet someone, I'm late, bye". Then stroll off while she stands there wondering what she's missing. :bunny: Then be sure to post to tell us how it went.
notmakingsense Posted February 13, 2007 Posted February 13, 2007 I assume you are talking about a face 2 face run in, or a call you didn't let go to voice-mail? You will only be "prepared" when you don't care about her much any more. Until then, the advice I have read most often and followed myself is to simply act friendly, but very busy, as in: Her: "Hi, how are you?" You: "Good, yourself?" Her: "Great, I've been, blah, blah, blah, blah...." You: "That's nice. Hey, I'd love to stay and chat, but I have to get going" (glance at watch) "Take care!" (looks busy and gets the heck out of there) Don't give her any personal information and don't ask for any about her! This is very important! You don't want to know what she's up to -- there is too much to read in to. In other words: The less said, the better. Seeing her will screw with your head for a while, but you will notice that you will get over it more quickly. Best advice is to continue avoiding contact.
CaliGuy Posted February 13, 2007 Posted February 13, 2007 Hey all Some good news for once, I can tell that in this past week I've been feeling a little bit better Nowhere near healed yet tho. I know what my next objective is though, I need to prepare myself for contact with her. Its going to happen one way or another, and in my current mindset I'd have a breakdown and be back to 6 weeks ago So, how do I prepare myself? Im not prepared to let all this hard work goto waste because she decides she hasnt moaned at me for a while, or I see her in the street or something. I don't know if im feeling better because im over it, or because ive just blocked it out... I think its the latter, which scares me because im still not in control :s Any advice guys? Thanks Rocket "The greatest problems in my life never came to fruition." - Mark Twain Stop worrying about things in your life that haven't happened.
SurferGirlTx Posted February 14, 2007 Posted February 14, 2007 Why are you wasting time preparing yourself for contact? In a way don't you mean you're hoping to have contact with her? Re-train your focus on preparing for your future WITHOUT her!
Author RocketMan2 Posted February 15, 2007 Author Posted February 15, 2007 http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?p=1088660 Rocket
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