LilAngel41211 Posted February 12, 2007 Posted February 12, 2007 There is this guy I work with who is married and I am not sure of some of the things that have happened recently with him. I need some advice. Often when I was near this guy at work I would feel a strong sexual attraction to him. It made me uncomfortable and I would often try to move away from him because he is married and I do not want to give off the wrong impression. I have a very strong sexuality which I know men sense very easily and I did not want him to feel that about me. One day I said to this guy at work, "is there anything you would like me to do?" (I have to ask him for things to do sometimes. I always say it that way.) He said, "you mean as in office work?" And I said "yes." He said "oh, darn it!" and laughed while snapping his fingers in mock frustration. I was surprised because it seemed like he was perhaps hitting on me. The next day was really emberassing because I was not sure if he had been hitting on me and then, two times in a row that day, when we were standing talking about something and I had to look at something close to him I accidentally brushed his hand with mine. I did NOT do it on purpose but later that day when I thought back on it I realized he might have thought I was doing it on purpose. I felt emberassed and hoped he did not think I had done that purposely because I do not want to hit on him. For about 4 days I tried to avoid him. I was polite but stayed away and did not talk to him. He finally said something to me and added "if you are still talking to me, that is." So I realized maybe I had better be more friendly again so I went back to being more friendly. A day or so later I was walking past him and he said "there's the troublemaker." I said, "why am I the troublemaker?" He replied "I don't know. I just wanted to give you a nickname and that's the one I picked." I thought that was strange because I don't think I cause any trouble at work. I work hard and do my job and don't goof around. Everyone says I am a hard worker and that they are pleased with me. The other day I had on high heels that were killing me. He asked why I had to sit and I told him because they hurt. Then he said "they look really good though." My question is this: was he hitting on me? What exactly is going on and how should I handle this? Thanks :-)
Topper Posted February 12, 2007 Posted February 12, 2007 Seems like he thought you may have been dropping hints toward him. If you are as sexual as you say you are Guys do pick up on that. Uncounciously you maybe sending out more hints in jesters, body language and other forms of nonverbal communication. He might be sending signals back just to see if you pick up on them. He may not at this point even be thinking it could lead to something. Deep down inside we all want some validation of our sexuality. Might be he only wants to know that you are attracted to him. he walks away thinking I still got it the little hottie digs me. You seem to be very confident about your sexuality. Knowing you could get this guy in bed has to be a pretty powerful high for you. Not that you would follow through with anything. It is just the Knowing that you could. However it is a dangerous game the two of you are playing. One false move and it could lead to doing something both of you will regret. You might have to find a boyfriend outside the office that can help you curb your sexuality some.
the_total_package Posted February 12, 2007 Posted February 12, 2007 men sense your sexuality, that is kind of ridiculous. A lot of women are very sexual people, to say that you have no control. Yes, you might be attractive, if you are sticking out your breasts, giving big doe eyes and licking your lips when an attractive man walks in, that is your doing, that is not 'something that men just pick up on.' That made me laugh. I am very attractive, I know that some men at work look at me, but they know the boundaries because I am all professional at work, which is what you need to be to. The fact that you are this high off that a married guy at work has the hots for you exhibits your naivete and unprofessionalism at work, just the fact that you are posting on here with that. I think you are over analyzing the situation with the guy, just let it go. Sure he thinks you're attractive, and you're very naieve and narcisstic because you think that every man is just sensing this inner sexuality you have and it's driving them all crazy when they see you. Be professional at work. Your coworkers are coworkers, don't give them signals, and don't claim it's out of your control because of your uncontrollable inner sexuality.
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