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Married man, married woman


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Posted

I know someone who works in my development where I live, he is married and I am married. We have been building some kind of friendship for the past few years. We have never gone out in any way always in my house which is the type of job he does, works for maintenance. He is the boss.

 

I recently was very ill and he really showed so much caring it really touched me. He seems like he was touched as well by my kindness. He seems so into the realtionship and claims I should call him anytime I want to talk or if I need something. It seems odd for a married man to be so insistant on this calling thing and he claims we are friends and he is great with that. The word friendship is knew, howerver, I am confused by this. Why would a married man who works so hard be interested in a friendship with a married (older) woman ( I feel I am attractive). I have since gotten through my illness and am ready to resume life. I always compliment him and I mean what I say, I buy him gifts to say thanks and I am always so happy to see him.

 

Where can this go?Thanks, please feel free to help. I am the one obsessed, he wants friendship which he seems to run after. If I don't call he shows up.

Posted

What is your interest in him? Where does your husband fit into all this?

 

If you and this guy can be the kind of friends that get together along with your husband and his wife, then be friends. If this is a personal friendship where you wouldn't want to introduce him to your husband, or he wouldn't introduce you to his wife, then you know you're crossing the line into trouble.

 

Don't make trouble where it doesn't exist. If you want to see what kind of trouble can happen, read the Infidelity forum or the Other Man/Other Woman forum, and see the heartbreak that always, always, always comes out of inappropriate friendships and affairs.

Posted

I personally believe that when you are married there is no such thing as "my friends" and "your friends". Just as you commingle everything else there should be not be a friend who is only a friend to one member of the marriage. If this is a special guy, as you have mentioned, then you should want to share this person with your spouse and should want to get to know his spouse as well. You are right to be suspicious of why he is so interested in you. The best thing you can do is turn your one on one relationship into one that involves both of your spouses. Hopefully, something wonderful will come from it.

Posted
Where can this go?

 

I dunno....purgatory?

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