Guest Posted February 9, 2007 Posted February 9, 2007 My boyfriend cheated on me some time ago now and I have had a hard time getting over it.Last night we went out to a bar and when I was up buying drinks I turned around and saw what I thought was him flirting with another girl.Then later on another one came up to him,introduced herself to him and seemed quite cosy for a few minutes then left. I was so full of jelousy I said some things to him as I know what a big flirt he is.He ended up walking out and leaving me there with some friends.I got a lift home not long afterwards and he was in bed,we had an arguement,I was going to walk out,he told me if that's what I wanted to do then go.I decided that I should not leave as it was my house too so I climbed into bed. The next thing his arms were around me and he was kissing me so hard telling me how much he loved me and then we had rough but passionate sex!We fell asleep in each others arms and I felt then he truly did love me. How do I overcome this jelousy of mine?I mean,the makeup sex is wonderful but I can't go out with him without feeling jelouse if a girl walks up to him or he speaks to another.
norajane Posted February 13, 2007 Posted February 13, 2007 Since he cheated on you, I think it's perfectly understandable that you get jealous when you see him talking to other girls. Have you tried having a conversation about this when you are both calm and not right after you've seen him talking with someone? Maybe if you can explain why you are so troubled, he can understand it better rather than getting defensive about it. Tell him it takes time rebuild trust, so he has to help you do that by being trustworthy and sometimes bending over backwards (not being so friendly with women in bars), until he's proved that he can be trusted around other women. Since he cheated, he should understand that he needs to make it up to you and be on his best behavior when he's around other women so he doesn't give you any reason to feel upset. At the same time, if you are going to stay with him, you can't let this torture you forever, either. If you can't handle it, then you might have to consider breaking up. How long ago was it that he cheated?
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