bellababygirl Posted February 7, 2007 Posted February 7, 2007 I told him he works to much...he told me I sounded just like his mother. He wasn't mad when he said it, he was kind of laughing... He said she would love me that we are a lot alike. He said his mother is my biggest ALIA! WTF? Is he trying to confuse me? I dont want to remind him of his mother! He did not say it mad at all, he said he loves his mother more than anyone. I have never been refered to as sounding like someones mother. Should I take this as a good thing or a bad thing? Anyone else been told they remind their MM of his mother? God, I hope this doesnt mean he is a mommas boy...????
YoMomma Posted February 7, 2007 Posted February 7, 2007 I told him he works to much...he told me I sounded just like his mother. He wasn't mad when he said it, he was kind of laughing... He said she would love me that we are a lot alike. He said his mother is my biggest ALIA! WTF? Is he trying to confuse me? I dont want to remind him of his mother! He did not say it mad at all, he said he loves his mother more than anyone. I have never been refered to as sounding like someones mother. Should I take this as a good thing or a bad thing? Anyone else been told they remind their MM of his mother? God, I hope this doesnt mean he is a mommas boy...???? ALLY = The state of being allied; the act of allying or uniting; a union or connection of interests between families, states, parties, etc., especially between families by marriage and states by compact, treaty, or league; as, matrimonial alliances; an alliance between church and state; an alliance between France and England. I think he meant that his mother is his greatest ally. After all - I am SURE you haven't met her - or have you????? :rolleyes:
norajane Posted February 7, 2007 Posted February 7, 2007 By talking of his need to work less, you are taking on a caregiver role. That's what mothers do, as I'm sure you know. That's why he's saying you remind him of her, because you are not being the sexy mistress when you talk of him working less, but the concerned mommy worried about her little boy. You have allied yourself with his mother by worrying about his well-being.
Je Ne Regrette Rien Posted February 7, 2007 Posted February 7, 2007 I for one wouldn't take it as a compliment. What else does a mother do? Straighten his tie? Tell him to get a haircut? I'd be pretty upset. I'm sure he doesn't find his mother sexy Bless you, BBG, you're going through the mill at the moment...
ratingsguy Posted February 7, 2007 Posted February 7, 2007 That's a tough call. Even if I feel like saying it, I don't. I learned from my very first girlfriend about 10 years ago, that you NEVER tell a girl that she reminds you of her mother. To this day, I can't explain exactly why you shouldn't do it, other than the fact that most women generally do take offense to that. It's just one of those things... kind of like never getting into a disagreement with a pregnant woman. My married friends will tell me that saying "yes dear" is the way to go.
Author bellababygirl Posted February 8, 2007 Author Posted February 8, 2007 ALLY = The state of being allied; the act of allying or uniting; a union or connection of interests between families, states, parties, etc., especially between families by marriage and states by compact, treaty, or league; as, matrimonial alliances; an alliance between church and state; an alliance between France and England. I think he meant that his mother is his greatest ally. After all - I am SURE you haven't met her - or have you????? :rolleyes: Thanks my spelling is horrible since spell check was invented!
Author bellababygirl Posted February 8, 2007 Author Posted February 8, 2007 That's a tough call. Even if I feel like saying it, I don't. I learned from my very first girlfriend about 10 years ago, that you NEVER tell a girl that she reminds you of her mother. To this day, I can't explain exactly why you shouldn't do it, other than the fact that most women generally do take offense to that. It's just one of those things... kind of like never getting into a disagreement with a pregnant woman. My married friends will tell me that saying "yes dear" is the way to go. The "yes, dear" response works for me!
Author bellababygirl Posted February 8, 2007 Author Posted February 8, 2007 By talking of his need to work less, you are taking on a caregiver role. That's what mothers do, as I'm sure you know. That's why he's saying you remind him of her, because you are not being the sexy mistress when you talk of him working less, but the concerned mommy worried about her little boy. You have allied yourself with his mother by worrying about his well-being. Worrying about his well-being is not a bad thing though. He has worked so much for so long...how much longer does he plan on keeping up at this pace...its not like he's 30 years old and starting his career. He is an accomlished man, wealthy...etc...how much more does he want to accomplish...when is enough ever enough??? I dont mean to take a mothering role, but making me go two weeks without attention (okay, okay, sex) makes me feel neglected and my hormones are running crazy then on top of it when I dont see him I start thinking all kinds of crazy things... He must makes me insane...
norajane Posted February 8, 2007 Posted February 8, 2007 Worrying about his well-being is not a bad thing though. He has worked so much for so long...how much longer does he plan on keeping up at this pace...its not like he's 30 years old and starting his career. He is an accomlished man, wealthy...etc...how much more does he want to accomplish...when is enough ever enough??? I dont mean to take a mothering role, but making me go two weeks without attention (okay, okay, sex) makes me feel neglected and my hormones are running crazy then on top of it when I dont see him I start thinking all kinds of crazy things... He must makes me insane... It's never enough for people who must make millions and billions. If it were, they would have stopped long ago. He's not doing it for the money anymore - he's doing it because it's all he knows, it's who he is. If you have issues with the amount of time he spends with you, you're barking up the wrong tree by focusing on how hard he works and being motherly. Just straight up tell him you want more time and you don't care what he has to do to fit you in. Because he's not going to stop working. Those kinds of men die on the job.
Author bellababygirl Posted February 8, 2007 Author Posted February 8, 2007 It's never enough for people who must make millions and billions. If it were, they would have stopped long ago. He's not doing it for the money anymore - he's doing it because it's all he knows, it's who he is. If you have issues with the amount of time he spends with you, you're barking up the wrong tree by focusing on how hard he works and being motherly. Just straight up tell him you want more time and you don't care what he has to do to fit you in. Because he's not going to stop working. Those kinds of men die on the job. I told him if he really WANTED to spend time with me he would make it happen. I was literally yelling at him this morning. He just kept saying he was sorry, he understands, and when he comes over we will have a long talk and he will make things right. I told him I cant do this...he makes me feel neglected and that he doesnt even miss me...that I feel like he is trying to avoid me. He just assured me he is working, he is not avoiding me...he isnt even in the state...and yes, he does miss me. I was really mad..he just kept being so sweet and nice. How can he do that? How come he is so calm and loving when most guys would be arguing right back at me? He is always like that...
Author bellababygirl Posted February 8, 2007 Author Posted February 8, 2007 It's never enough for people who must make millions and billions. If it were, they would have stopped long ago. He's not doing it for the money anymore - he's doing it because it's all he knows, it's who he is. If you have issues with the amount of time he spends with you, you're barking up the wrong tree by focusing on how hard he works and being motherly. Just straight up tell him you want more time and you don't care what he has to do to fit you in. Because he's not going to stop working. Those kinds of men die on the job. So should I give him an ultimatum? I mean, he knows I am not happy about the time. He said he is going to make it right...well, what is right?
norajane Posted February 8, 2007 Posted February 8, 2007 So should I give him an ultimatum? I mean, he knows I am not happy about the time. He said he is going to make it right...well, what is right? You're never going to get the time you want, ultimatum or not. He will not cut down on his work - that is a given. He has no intention of divorcing - that is also a given. So, basically, you either accept what little time he gives you, or you walk away from him and hope he makes time for your child. You really have no other choice.
Author bellababygirl Posted February 8, 2007 Author Posted February 8, 2007 You're never going to get the time you want, ultimatum or not. He will not cut down on his work - that is a given. He has no intention of divorcing - that is also a given. So, basically, you either accept what little time he gives you, or you walk away from him and hope he makes time for your child. You really have no other choice. He sucks! Why when is it when I try to back away, call him on his previous lies, and ask him direct questions about our son, situation, etc. he is all about being mr. sweetguy??? it pisses me off that he is so freakin sweet to me when I am trying to be mad at him and leave...its like he knows just how far I will let him push me before he has to real me back in... How is he so smooth in knowing what makes me tick??? MM suck!
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