I finally let go of my affair.

[sassy N sassy]

It has been 4 monthhs i have no contact with him in person just few emails everynow in then. My heart could not take it anymore. I wrote him and told him i was letting go of him. that he was free of me. I told him i was hurting. all he could say he know i was hurting, but he didnt have the anwers. and he know where i was coming from. I said after all this time you dont have the answers. it hurt me like hell .

 

he said he would leave me alone. I have been staying strong and staying away. I realize you cant hold on forever no matter how bad it hurts. He does not show me no feelings at all. i just can't figure him out. i tryed and tryed. All i want to do is cry. I want to email him but i got to hang in there. any one out there have any advise. I seen him for 12 you no its not easy just up and walk away. well any way its not easy for me. I dont think he cares about me like i do him. why i say that is because i tell him i love him he used to tell me but he stop. but he was still seeing me. I need advise its killing me tearing me apart. :( :(

[scubafish]

it sounds like you know the answer already.. if he really truly loved you, he would not be hurting you like this.

start some new hobbies or acivities to keep yourself occupied. I have just started trying to work through break up pain, and it helps to just go out of the house, even to walk around mall or something simple.

remind yourself how much he hurt you, and get angry about it, that helps get over it too!!!

[sassy N sassy]

Which is it? Because if you've been emailing "every now and then", then you have been in contact. No contact means NO CONTACT of ANY kind.

 

 

 

I take it from your description of events that the OM is married? Does his W know about the affair? Are you married?

 

 

 

Stop seeking answers from your former affair partner. You won't find them there. Only confusion and destruction.

 

 

 

Don't try 2 figure him out. He's not your problem anymore, and you're not his.

 

 

 

My W had a 12-year affair with a coworker who was also married. It's taken her 5 years so far since I found discovered the affair for her 2 really show signs of truly getting over the OM. It will likely take you years 2 get over your OM as well. And you'll only START the withdrawal process by never having any contact of any kind with the OM ever again.

 

Recovery from infidelity is very hard, but very character-building. I'm sorry you wasted 12 years of your life on someone who could never truly be there for you.

 

best,

-ol' 2long

Thank you for your comment. Yes i.m married he has a live in girfriend they are same as married . my affair with him also 12 years. It just gets hard . MY husband doesn't shows me any antention . that why i had the affair. I just got lonely.

[toostupid2007]

Hi there,

 

I think I know exactly what you are feeling now. Mabe better now? The time will heal you, I can promise. There is no future between you (mosre likely), so just leave it.

 

I have been seeing a MM like you and it has been ridiculouely taken so long to feel this way. I have been thinking of him every single second. Unbelievably took so long to be brave to take my action like this, replying to him as *let us meet up to understand then let it be ended properly, okay?*. In fact, I am going to see him THIS AFTERNOON to finish off. We both now kind of agreed to do so, so it would be okay. I would not want to argue any more. It has been painfully hurting and stressful. It is FAR enough. After all, he is married. It is not worthy at all.

 

It is stupid, I know. I am stupid. But if you are wondering, I would say, leave it. Be back to normal. Move on and find a new life. That is what I am going to do from today!

 

Best,

ts

[sassy N sassy]

Hi there,

 

I think I know exactly what you are feeling now. Mabe better now? The time will heal you, I can promise. There is no future between you (mosre likely), so just leave it.

 

I have been seeing a MM like you and it has been ridiculouely taken so long to feel this way. I have been thinking of him every single second. Unbelievably took so long to be brave to take my action like this, replying to him as *let us meet up to understand then let it be ended properly, okay?*. In fact, I am going to see him THIS AFTERNOON to finish off. We both now kind of agreed to do so, so it would be okay. I would not want to argue any more. It has been painfully hurting and stressful. It is FAR enough. After all, he is married. It is not worthy at all.

 

It is stupid, I know. I am stupid. But if you are wondering, I would say, leave it. Be back to normal. Move on and find a new life. That is what I am going to do from today!

 

Best,

ts

yes it is painful. i'm the one ended the affair. then i got stupid email him back. but the didn.answer back. i guess that is good in away. i miss him so much its been terrible for me. i seen him for 12 years. things got so complicated for us. its going to take years i think to get over this. it seens like life is not the same without him. it gets harded for me everyday. all i do i cry. yes my friend end your affair. if he doesn't want no more then in affair then end it. the pleasure is not worth the pain. my affair has taught me a good lesson. not do it again.