soft heart Posted February 2, 2007 Posted February 2, 2007 We have been together for 3 years, in a long-distance relationship for 2 and a half years. My boyfriend has been recently telling how unhappy he is with the distance and that he needs attention, care and I can't do this from being so far. He has been telling me how upset he is with it and something has to be done as he cannot continue this way. He told me he needs physical contact more often than just once a month. So we both agreed that we will try our best to move closer to each other within the next 6 months. Either he will try to find a job near me, in my country and if he won't be able, I will to go to his country. We both were happy with our decision. He has been having a hard time at work with his boss and because of that he has not been promoted as he had hoped to. He has been telling how upset he is that I cannot be there close enough to him. He has been telling me that he is tired of this and it's upsetting him. He said he has needs that I cannot satisfy since I am not close enough to him. So 2 days ago he told me that he wants be less involved with me and to take a distance. He wants to do this until our situation changes. He said that if I want to continue our relationship, I need to accept this. He said that he still loves me and he cares for me but he does not want to spend his time talking on the phone all the time. I was quite shocked. He said that he needs to take the distance to stand the situation.I asked him if he is intersted in somebody else but he said that there is noone else and he would tell me if there was. However, why would he want to take a distance, now after giving each other the target to be closer? We had our anniversary 2 days ago and he texted me to wish me happy anniversary and signed with love, he then said to me that I should be sure that it does not mean that his feelings for me have changed. He just needs to help himself in order to save us. I asked him if we could talk. He called me after work and I started to question him about it. I said to him that I feel strange about it and I worry. He said that he tried to explain to me how he feels but has the feeling that I don't listen to him or I don't try to understand him. He said next time, he will just be quiet about his feelings then. He said if I cannot respect his feelings, he will go. He said that when he sees all of his friends with their girlfriends being close to them, he gets upset. He said that he is fed up of being the perfect boyfriend when he sees me only once in a while. I asked him again if it means he is with someone else, at this point he got upset and said to me that no there is noone else and that he has so much worry from work and I only add to his worry. He is coming to see me next week but I am feeling so strange and confused? Do you think it means that he has met someone else but does not want to tell me? Why would he want to take a distance and be less involved with me? I managed to stay away from contacting him but I am so worried? Please help.
LucreziaBorgia Posted February 2, 2007 Posted February 2, 2007 Is this the same guy who has been trying to break it off with you since March 2005 when you first posted? I went back and read your posts, and I remember them. He has asked for break after break, asking you to back off and telling you he needs space. Honestly... how much more "space" and "distance" does a guy who only sees you once a month need? I don't know that its a matter of him seeing someone else. It sounds more like he's just tired of taking all of these "breaks" and is ready for the "breakup".
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