kbah Posted January 31, 2007 Posted January 31, 2007 This past weekend my boyfriend and I were attacked on campus. I don't feel like going into too much detail, but it was completely uninstigated and unnecessary. I was attacked my three girls and he was attacked my two guys. He ended up having to go to the hospital and I have bruises and a sprained ankle from them grabbing at me so viciously. This happened Saturday night and since then, I have noticed myself becoming considerably less attracted to my boyfriend. We've been together for 2 years and our relationship is growing really strong. I have already been dealing with A LOT of mental stress and other issues outside the realtionship which affected is inside the relationship as well. After being attacked, these issues seem less important to me, but I feel distanced from my boyfriend. I feel like I care about him so much, but I don't feel "in love." I am pretty sure this HAS to be something psychological from the affects of being attacked....many I am scared he could have died? Maybe I am depressed? Please share your thoughts. I could really use the advice.
bab Posted January 31, 2007 Posted January 31, 2007 The only advice I can give is to go see a therapist. They will help you sort out your feelings over the attack and help you move on. Then you can find out what it is going on with you and your bf.
Limerent Posted January 31, 2007 Posted January 31, 2007 Could it possibly be because subconsciously, you expected him to be your protector, and you feel as if he let you down, even though in this situation you were both outnumbered? The mind has a funny way of processing things, and instinct has alot to do with it as well. Do you think instinctually, you are pushing him away because he failed to protect you?
Author kbah Posted January 31, 2007 Author Posted January 31, 2007 That's a good question. and possible as well. I am currently in therapy and undergoing some heavy-duty personal work. I am quite aware of myself and usually can kinda pinpoint my feelings by at least guessing the meaning behind them most the time. I do have serious problems getting really close to people. I always fear they will abandon me. Within the last month I have really attached to him more and opened up in a way I have never before with him. Perhaps, I became attached and then saw that he could be taken away by someone else. (whether he was injured or died....) I plan on discussing this with my counselor, but I just wanted other insight.
ShoeGirl Posted February 2, 2007 Posted February 2, 2007 Sorry to hear about your attack, I am a college student and there have been several attacks on/near my campus recently that scare the crap out of me. I'm glad you and your bf got away with out serious injuries! I agree with, Limerent, about you possibly thinking of him as your protector, at least that was my initial thought. If I were you I would bring this up with your therapist as soon as you can. It also may help, if your bf knows you are seeing a therapist, to talk to him about it... as long as you think that he will support you.
Green Posted February 2, 2007 Posted February 2, 2007 First of all please go into more detail about the fight I think it may have the answer of why you feel this way even though u dont want to go into the detail I say theres something there. Ive been in situations where ...
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