silveris250 Posted January 27, 2007 Posted January 27, 2007 I'll try to make this as brief as I can. I've been in a relationship with g/f for 9 month months going on 10. A couple nights ago, we had a big argument about past relationships (actually it was me initating this). It got to the point where she said, "it's over." Now, we've both been in relationships where we have been hurt (she was in one for 4 yrs and for me 3 yrs). Now, the thing was..I contacted her a couple days later, and she told me that this relationships is to hard to handle, I'm too "high maintainence" and that I expect to much. Now let me back track to tell you guys, that this girl has never had a guy treat her like a REAL gentleman, so she comes off very cold, upfront, no emotions what so ever, but I had the patients to really open her up, which is awesome. So, she's telling me this with no signs of emotion..but she still wants to be, "friends," and talk everyday. Now, I'm getting the feeling like, "what the hell, I'm confused." So we talk, and then she tells me she misses me..I then ask," so what are we?" It then comes out that she says, she didnt' know what to feel because she doesn't know how to handle this type of situation, and her past relationships really,"messed" her up, and feels that I'm giving her false hope, she'd rather not deal with the situation. She wants to take things slow, and doesn't want to feel like shes in a "long committed relationship, because of false hope?" She says that It wasn't,"me" thats thinkin this, but her, and its always in her mind. So i really dont knwo how to approach this. How can I show her that I really care about her and want to be in the long-run with her???
unconventionality Posted January 27, 2007 Posted January 27, 2007 I think she needs a bit of space to reassess things. It'd be good if you continued to be there for her as a friend and if she can sort things out so that she knows where your relationship is... She sounds like she needs help. I've been in some damaging relationships too. And they can really suck. It's great that you've been there and that you've been a true gentleman.
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