IslandGirl73 Posted January 26, 2007 Posted January 26, 2007 any males reading this, i need your opinion of what u'd think this all means, coming from the direction of a male, please read my post: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t110720/ ok so from a male's perspective, what could possibly explain this kind of behavior? maybe coming from how a man thinks, i can get a better picture of what to make of OM's actions, any and all comments are welcomed-i'm at a lost, thx!
whichwayisup Posted January 26, 2007 Posted January 26, 2007 J!!! STOP IT!! You're posting the SAME THING AGAIN! You seriously need help, you're OBSESSING about the OM, it's FREAKY behaviour. No wonder he's backing off of you on a real personal level. Yes, you are here for support, but posting the same sort of questions over and over again, isn't helping you, nor any of us who are TRYING our best to get you see things in a different light. It's like we all post reply back to you, then BOOM, another thread has been started by you saying the SAME thing as before!
Author IslandGirl73 Posted January 26, 2007 Author Posted January 26, 2007 whichwayisup, r u a male? if not, i need a male's perception on this....
Author IslandGirl73 Posted January 26, 2007 Author Posted January 26, 2007 ok, and one that have lots of words of wisdome, might i add. please know that i hear everything u're saying, and i'm trying, i really really am. just one thought though, u honestly don't think OM's actions are his way of trying to keep me close but afraid to go any further cuz of my previous actions?
Curmudgeon Posted January 26, 2007 Posted January 26, 2007 whichwayisup, r u a male? if not, i need a male's perception on this.... You also wrote in response to WWIU in your other thread: as for your question, the reason why i haven't answered it is cuz at this point and how i'm feeling, how could u expect another woman on dh's mind would even matter to me-i know its not the right thing to say and i wish like hell i didn't feel this way, but i do. if there was another woman on dh's mind, right now, i don't think i'd be concerned cuz of the plight that i'm in.....i'd probably tell him at that point that we should just seperate till we both figure out if we still want our marriage or not.... My perception is that you should just do it -- separate from your husband that is. He deserves better and you're obviously obsessed with the OM who, clearly, doesn't feel the same way about you and was likely just testing the waters when he approached you at lunch. He was just seeing if he could still get some. Why don't you do the right thing and set your husband free?
Curmudgeon Posted January 26, 2007 Posted January 26, 2007 Did you ever see the movie, "Fatal Attraction?" That's every philandering males' greatest nightmare.
whichwayisup Posted January 26, 2007 Posted January 26, 2007 I understand and hopefully a guy will reply to your thread. But in all honesty, trying to figure out what the OM is thinking, doing isn't going to change the fact you're married...Ego wants to know, I get that, and feelings as well...Just take it day by day... just one thought though, u honestly don't think OM's actions are his way of trying to keep me close but afraid to go any further cuz of my previous actions I think OM knows nothing is going to happen between you two, and most of all, because of that, he has backed off and made himself "less personable" with you. I think he's being nice, handling it quietly and maturely...Not reacting either way, which is actually best. I mean, what if the guy did a 180 on you and showed up at your front door at home? Professing his love to you. Think about it, wouldn't that just scare the crap outta ya? With your daughter and husband home? In all honesty, how would you react? Tell your husband right away and run to the OM, or would it freak you OUT so bad, you'd realize that the crush IS just a crush and it should be left as just that.
Author IslandGirl73 Posted January 26, 2007 Author Posted January 26, 2007 curmudgeon, i hear your point but the fact is I never "gave him some" or was sexually intimate with him. that's why I'm confused over all this cuz its not like i gave him a reason to use me and he then moves on after he got what he wanted...no i never slept with him so why all the mixed signals....thx for your reply
Curmudgeon Posted January 26, 2007 Posted January 26, 2007 For some men getting there is half the fun. The chase is more satisfying than consummation. Perhaps he's one of those.
Author IslandGirl73 Posted January 26, 2007 Author Posted January 26, 2007 For some men getting there is half the fun. The chase is more satisfying than consummation. Perhaps he's one of those. ok, so maybe that explains his actions then, its a cat and mouse game of chase for him. probably one that he didn't bargain on ending up backfiring on him by me falling for him like i did. thanks, curmudgeon, i knew seeing it from a male's perspective would help me to understand his actions....thanks so much!
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