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Forced to see ex after 9 months NC


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Posted

I could really use some advice if anyone has ever been in this situation. My ex broke my heart last year (proved to be dishonest, manipulative, etc) and it has been NC ever since, instigated by me. We have a mutual friend and he knows I want nothing to do with him.

 

We're in the same profession, and I teach at a local college. I just found out that he has joined the faculty, and will be teaching a class on the same night as me, directly across the hall. There's no way that I won't run into him.

 

He did a lot of emotional damage, and even the thought of him still gives me a sick feeling in my stomach. Even though I know I shouldn't be, I'm terrified of this situation. I normally love teaching and now I'm dreading having to go there every week.

 

Does anyone have any advice for how to handle myself in this situation? I don't want him to get the best of me and get me down, but right now that's definitely what is happening. Thanks

Posted
I could really use some advice if anyone has ever been in this situation. My ex broke my heart last year (proved to be dishonest, manipulative, etc) and it has been NC ever since, instigated by me. We have a mutual friend and he knows I want nothing to do with him.

 

We're in the same profession, and I teach at a local college. I just found out that he has joined the faculty, and will be teaching a class on the same night as me, directly across the hall. There's no way that I won't run into him.

 

He did a lot of emotional damage, and even the thought of him still gives me a sick feeling in my stomach. Even though I know I shouldn't be, I'm terrified of this situation. I normally love teaching and now I'm dreading having to go there every week.

 

Does anyone have any advice for how to handle myself in this situation? I don't want him to get the best of me and get me down, but right now that's definitely what is happening. Thanks

 

You are going to have to get use to seeing him since he joined the faculty, so its best to get it out of the way immediately. He is the one who screwed up, not you. Why should you let hium get the best of you? I know that you stronger than that. This guy is a POS and he doesn't deserve to have any negative effect on you at all. I know that its easier said than done, but you are going to have to face him often if he is working with you, so get r done.

Posted

RE:

 

I normally love teaching and now I'm dreading having to go there every week.

 

That is understandable. In all honesty, there is not much to fear. Yes, he did some damage and caused you to go off an emotional tailspin -but it is your time now to shine.

 

You should be confident, healthy, determined and open to do what you love in life using your past experiences as a base ground for further personal improvement and development. So that one day, you'd be ready for that special someone.

 

I hope, you understand that you're much better off without him. Don't worry too much about it. Relax.

 

Do yourself a favor: Stay positive and vibrant.

 

Good Luck,

Sand&Water

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Posted

Thanks for the feedback. Does that mean that when I pass him in the hallway I should say hello to him the way I would to any other teacher, or just ignore him? I don't think he deserves a hello from me, but I also want to take the high road.

Posted

If you ignore him you will show him that you still care..

 

Treat him with indifference..

Don't go out of your way to say Hi but if you cross paths just say Hi and keep on moving.. no chit chat..

 

Maybe he has gone bald in the 9 months and you will get to giggle to yourself when you see him..

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