98lbwuss Posted January 25, 2007 Posted January 25, 2007 We had a stupid argument that I could have avoided (i know i am blaming myself here, maybe i shouldn't, maybe i should) It is way to complex to type it all out. We talked about making it work and getting some counseling. I had to leave because she needed to go to work. She went to the bathroom, came back and said "i need you to have your stuff out by the weekend" it hit me like a ton of bricks. I have been through this before and I know what I'm supposd to do. I have done the NC thing and it worked. But when my GF and I broke up I totally lost it. I showed up in tears the next day with flowers. Then I emailed her a long letter. Next I sent her a huge thing of flowers to her at work. I have had NC since. I did however go get my things out her house this week. (I have the code and was asked to do so when we last spoke). Day 11 since break up. Day 9 of NC Have I lost all shreds of hope? Did I blow any chance we might have had? I did all the wrong things. Now I'm doing what I think is the right thing by NC? I had to go talk to a therapist because I am just not dealing with this. We had been together for 4.5 years. One year ago, almost to the day, we broke up for about a month. I did the NC and she called me out of the blue and I went over to her house and we talked. I explained to her that I couldn't be who she needed to be. She kept asking me "why didn't you call? you always call, why?" She begged me and said we deserved to try again and that we had invested so much that we needed to see it through. I love her so I agreed. During that month or so I had done the only truly adult thing I had probably ever done in my life, let her go so she could truly be happy. I had moved on. I still loved her very much. I loved her enough to want her to be happy and acually meant it, not just some cliche people say. But now I feel like I have been cheated almost. We gave it another go because she had asked and now I kind of almost feel like I deserve that same shot that I gave her. I am so freaking confused.
norajane Posted January 25, 2007 Posted January 25, 2007 If she broke up with you after having a stupid argument and after discussing going to counseling, it sounds like she may have already been unsure of your relationship and decided it just wasn't worth it to continue. Continue with NC. The point is not to get her back - you tried for the last year and you've ended up in the same place as last time. This time, accept that it is over. I know it's painful and confusing, but take your power back and remind yourself that things weren't all peachy before this argument - certainly they weren't if you were considering counseling. If she doesn't want to work on things, then she's not worthy of your time. Good luck to you.
Recommended Posts