Walk Posted January 24, 2007 Posted January 24, 2007 Quck question... You're a guy, you're lifting weights at home. Your gf comes into the room you're working out in completely naked, and sits down in a chair nearby. Not unfriendly or anything, just not getting in the way of the work out. Would you: A.) Think that was cool. Finish your work out, take a shower and maybe have sex with your gf. B.) Think it was weird, finish your work-out and pretend it didn't happen. C.) Get upset about it. Yell at gf for it. Then take off for a drive to "clear your head".
norajane Posted January 24, 2007 Posted January 24, 2007 Is this like my sports vs. sex thread? If I were the guy, I'd be taking the shower WITH my naked gf. And I'm sure the naked visuals would help make the workout faster.
princessa Posted January 24, 2007 Posted January 24, 2007 If I were the naked girl I'd suggest he used me as the weight
Limerent Posted January 24, 2007 Posted January 24, 2007 C.) Get upset about it. Yell at gf for it. Then take off for a drive to "clear your head". I take it that is what option he decided to take... Perhaps he felt uncomfortable being seen so raw, and vulnerable. It could be that he has that type of mentality that is embarrased to be seen fixing a problem and would rather be seen after the problem is corrected.... "no of course I havent been working out, this is just naturally how I look" I tend to think that he might have felt a bit vulnerable and as if nothing is ever private, and just a little invaded. You are fully clothed and sitting down, above him, not sweating, and not in a weak moment. He is fully naked, below you, sweating, and in a weak moment of trying to tone up on his imperfections. It seems a bit vulnerable. But it isnt an excuse to lash out at you. He probably felt startled and embarrassed.
norajane Posted January 24, 2007 Posted January 24, 2007 You are fully clothed and sitting down, above him, not sweating, and not in a weak moment. He is fully naked, below you, sweating, and in a weak moment of trying to tone up on his imperfections. It seems a bit vulnerable. Oh, I thought the girl was naked!
Unbeleivable Posted January 24, 2007 Posted January 24, 2007 I'd probably pick D) Stop workout and attend to naked girlfriend. Finish workout later.
Limerent Posted January 24, 2007 Posted January 24, 2007 Oh, I thought the girl was naked! Opps, she was!!! NEVERMIND... Instead, here is my advice: He felt like you would use any ploy necessary for distracting him, and it pissed him off. As if you were trying to invade on his personal time and space. Not unfriendly or anything, just not getting in the way of the work out. Thats just it. Your naked. Your in there. You are getting in the way. He probably felt as if you were trying to manipulate his time too much.
PussInHeels Posted January 24, 2007 Posted January 24, 2007 I don't like being interrupted in my workout, but if it's for sex, I can take a break... And while an interrupted work-out annoys me, I don't see how a naked person just sitting there and watching is a big deal. If your guy chose C, perhaps he's too obsessive about his workouts. Or maybe he was just cranky.
blind_otter Posted January 24, 2007 Posted January 24, 2007 Oh, I thought the girl was naked! It was worded oddly, but that's what I thought as well.
Salicious Crumb Posted January 24, 2007 Posted January 24, 2007 Quck question... You're a guy, you're lifting weights at home. Your gf comes into the room you're working out in completely naked, and sits down in a chair nearby. Not unfriendly or anything, just not getting in the way of the work out. Would you: A.) Think that was cool. Finish your work out, take a shower and maybe have sex with your gf. B.) Think it was weird, finish your work-out and pretend it didn't happen. C.) Get upset about it. Yell at gf for it. Then take off for a drive to "clear your head". Definitely A!
Limerent Posted January 24, 2007 Posted January 24, 2007 I'd probably pick D) Stop workout and attend to naked girlfriend. Finish workout later. yes, but this is the real world, complete with real world feelings and emotions. Not everyone is ready to go at the sight of a naked body. He had other things on his mind, and possibly felt forced to have to react to her nakedness and therefore it made him angry because it interrupted his private time, and he might have possibly viewed it as a manipulative tactic to steer him off of his intended course and he processed it as such at the time.
Author Walk Posted January 24, 2007 Author Posted January 24, 2007 So how come my bf got upset, and then took off for a drive? I don't get it. He said I was being controlling. That he was doing something he wanted to do as an individual and I was trying to stop him and make him focus on me... I just sat in the chair nearby. I sit there fully clothed on other times, and he doesn't consider that a control issue. yet naked it becomes a self-serving, selfish endeavor. To be honest with you... I had no intention of pulling him away from his workout. He doesn't work out that long. I was just waiting til he was done, and had a chance to hop in the shower afterward. Then he got snotty about it while I was sitting there, so I left and put clothes on and then started doing laundry after that. He finished his workout, and starts "talking" about how he doesn't understand why I would do that, and I should've asked him first, and what was I thinking.... <rant> some days I really hate my life. I gained weight. I feel f'ing obese. I think I look hideous. I'm self-concious as all get out about my body, yet I forced myself to pretend I wasn't because the bf said it shouldn't bother me. I have some kind of spot in my vision that blocks half my right eye and just spent nearly $500 for "specialists" to tell me they don't know what it is. I missed 4 of the 6 classes I have the last two days for people to take my money and can't even fix my problem. And now.... I try to do something I think he would enjoy, and I get pissed on for it. awesome... grr.. </rant>
PussInHeels Posted January 24, 2007 Posted January 24, 2007 Maybe it's me, but I just don't see how it's that crucial. If it was so annoying to him, he could just say calmly, "What you're doing is distracting me, just please give some time alone to finish." It's kind of a silly thing to have a hissy fit over I think... Are you sure there isn't some underlying reason why he would be frustrated or upset? This may have just been an opportunity to express his anger towards you.
Author Walk Posted January 24, 2007 Author Posted January 24, 2007 yes, but this is the real world, complete with real world feelings and emotions. Not everyone is ready to go at the sight of a naked body. He had other things on his mind, and possibly felt forced to have to react to her nakedness and therefore it made him angry because it interrupted his private time, and he might have possibly viewed it as a manipulative tactic to steer him off of his intended course and he processed it as such at the time. This was the problem. Think you pretty much nailed it. I wouldn't have even thought to go in there naked, except we had been sitting on the couch talking about sex and I said I wanted a shower first. So we head up stairs, he started working out while I jumped in the shower. I come out, sit down naked in the chair nearby, faced kind of away from him, and turned on my laptop... like... "I'm here.. but I'm keeping myself busy" kind of thing. Then he got upset.
CaliGuy Posted January 24, 2007 Posted January 24, 2007 Ummm, what's the reason for working out naked?
Art_Critic Posted January 24, 2007 Posted January 24, 2007 It wouldn't be A,B, or C for me.. It would be D... Screw the workout and have sex with the GF ..
Limerent Posted January 24, 2007 Posted January 24, 2007 I don't get it either. He said I was being controlling. That he was doing something he wanted to do as an individual and I was trying to stop him and make him focus on me... As I pointed out before, I think he saw that as you being manipulative. yet naked it becomes a self-serving, selfish endeavor. Sadly yes, I could see how he thought this as well, especially if neither of you are in the habit of shedding clothes unless its for sex or to take a shower. To be honest with you... I had no intention of pulling him away from his workout. I am sure that you didnt, but your nakedness subconciously made it look as if you did. so I left and put clothes on and then started doing laundry after that. He finished his workout, and starts "talking" about how he doesn't understand why I would do that, and I should've asked him first, and what was I thinking.... He was embarrassed for you, and embarrassed for his reaction towards you as well. He was trying to reason with you, because he knew that in that moment he knew you felt like a reproachful dog. some days I really hate my life. I gained weight. I feel f'ing obese. I think I look hideous. I'm self-concious as all get out about my body Of course that was reason you went in there naked in the first place, to boost your self esteem...Think about it...if you invade his time with your nakedness, and he takes you up on it, a part of you will have felt that much better, because you were alluring enough to stop his private time and focus it on you, thus boosting your self esteem. I commend you for trying to spice things up, but are you sure that it is not coming from a little bit of a selfish place? To boost your self esteem, perhaps?
LuminousZ Posted January 24, 2007 Posted January 24, 2007 There is a time and a place for everything..., AS a guy who likes being in shape / working out as well as naked women (My gf specifically).., that would certainly frustrate me.., as I'm trying to get something done in a healthy positive way - in comes distraction like kryptonite to superman - how is a guy suposed to concentrate on the task at hand in a situation like that?? A typical workout takes about 90 minutes - couldn't you schedule your nakedness for around the 89 minute mark??? While I appreciate the gesture..., I choose answer B.
Unbeleivable Posted January 24, 2007 Posted January 24, 2007 yes, but this is the real world, complete with real world feelings and emotions. Not everyone is ready to go at the sight of a naked body. He had other things on his mind, and possibly felt forced to have to react to her nakedness and therefore it made him angry because it interrupted his private time, and he might have possibly viewed it as a manipulative tactic to steer him off of his intended course and he processed it as such at the time. Well the question was simply if you were a guy and your girlfriend comes in naked while you are working out, what would you do? I said what I would do. Your response is valid, but assumes many things not stated in the question. Theres nothing that isn't "real world" about stopping a workout to attend to someone you supposedly love.
PussInHeels Posted January 24, 2007 Posted January 24, 2007 If you were talking about having sex very recently beforehand, I'm not sure I would consider it selfish. Maybe bad timing, but from the conversation you had you should have been made aware beforehand whether or not he was up for sex....
Author Walk Posted January 24, 2007 Author Posted January 24, 2007 There is a time and a place for everything..., would certainly frustrate me.., as I'm trying to get something done in a healthy positive way A typical workout takes about 90 minutes - couldn't you schedule your nakedness for around the 89 minute mark??? 90 minutes? Ha. We're talking 15 tops, and he started working out when I jumped in the shower... takes me 20 minutes in the shower.. After I left him alone.. he worked out for maybe 5 more minutes, and that was approximately how long he normally works out. He didn't cut it short for me. plus.. he's unemployed right now. He's on a break between jobs I guess you could say. I have classes and group meetings the rest of the day. From 1 to 9 tonight. Then I'm hitting the sack after that... if he wanted sex today... now was the only time. He'd rather work out.
PussInHeels Posted January 24, 2007 Posted January 24, 2007 If my husband bugged me to feed the cats while I was working out instead of doing it himself, I would probably yell at him. But if he showed up in the room naked waiting for me to finish, it wouldn't bother me. I know everyone's different, but I don't see how you can view such an action as purely malignant. And after all, the free weights and treadmill aren't going anywhere. Intimacy with a loved one is not always a sure thing. I know it sucks to compromise personal time for someone else, but all I'm saying is weigh your priorities.
Art_Critic Posted January 24, 2007 Posted January 24, 2007 Theres nothing that isn't "real world" about stopping a workout to attend to someone you supposedly love. What world do you live in ?? A workout is just exercise.. it isn't like he was training for the olympics.. I think her BF knew what she wanted and he didn't want it.. so he acted like an ass to make her the bad guy..
Author Walk Posted January 24, 2007 Author Posted January 24, 2007 If my husband bugged me to feed the cats while I was working out instead of doing it himself, I would probably yell at him. But if he showed up in the room naked waiting for me to finish, it wouldn't bother me. I know everyone's different, but I don't see how you can view such an action as purely malignant. And after all, the free weights and treadmill aren't going anywhere. Intimacy with a loved one is not always a sure thing. I know it sucks to compromise personal time for someone else, but all I'm saying is weigh your priorities. What's bugging me the most is that I feel like I comprimise MY time for him all the time. I don't get pissed about it. Unless I have a big project that's due right that moment and I HAVE to have it done in order to pass a class.. then anythign else can be worked around. Yet, his time is his time and I'm being controlling and manipulative if I "invade" it. I don't see it that way. I have coffee with my parents every friday, and the last three fridays' in a row I've had to cut it short, or entirely miss it in order to either lend him a hand, appease his ego, or run an errand he needed done. I sit in front of him naked while he's working out, and I'm the bad guy all of a sudden? I don't view a partner needing something as an "invasion". Not to mention, I was leaving in a couple hours anyway... He'd have the entire rest of the day to himself to do exactly as he pleased, or where he pleased. Entire REST OF THE DAY.
PussInHeels Posted January 24, 2007 Posted January 24, 2007 What's bugging me the most is that I feel like I comprimise MY time for him all the time. I don't get pissed about it. Unless I have a big project that's due right that moment and I HAVE to have it done in order to pass a class.. then anythign else can be worked around. Yet, his time is his time and I'm being controlling and manipulative if I "invade" it. I don't see it that way. I have coffee with my parents every friday, and the last three fridays' in a row I've had to cut it short, or entirely miss it in order to either lend him a hand, appease his ego, or run an errand he needed done. I sit in front of him naked while he's working out, and I'm the bad guy all of a sudden? I don't view a partner needing something as an "invasion". Not to mention, I was leaving in a couple hours anyway... He'd have the entire rest of the day to himself to do exactly as he pleased, or where he pleased. Entire REST OF THE DAY. Don't mean to judge but he's the one who sounds self-absorbed. If someone is important to you, you can work to match your schedules. Maybe you can't do anything about work or school, but you can at least not choose time you're supposed to spend together to work out.
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