pricillia Posted January 23, 2007 Posted January 23, 2007 I think my time is Today. The day that my heart will get broken or is actually breaking. Damm, Damm these f*****g feelings. Little signs are starting to add up... you know. Anyway I won't get into them know but I just feel like screeming again, but I can not do anything because I am at work, and I usually just hold it in anyway. I know that I sound a little needy here but I am not in the least but he has not called me today at all, and I think that he is pulling away and that is that. So where do I go from here, nowhere that's where. Who knows, because I certanly don't
puddleofmud Posted January 23, 2007 Posted January 23, 2007 Are you OK? Don't what has happened but am thinking of you, fondly, and sending much heart-felt good energy for your well-being to you! BIG HUG to you sweetheart!
GreenEyedLady Posted January 23, 2007 Posted January 23, 2007 So where do I go from here, nowhere that's where. Who knows, because I certanly don't P: First of all, are you sure you're not overreacting? Take a deep breath and calm down...I think you may be reading too much into this... As for where do go now? You can go FORWARD girl! You were someone before you met him and you'll be someone if it ends...He is not the reason you live, YOU are! The future is a great thing girl! Don't ever stay because you are afraid to be alone, stay because you love him...Fear can be a powerful thing, but empowerment is even stronger...
Author pricillia Posted January 23, 2007 Author Posted January 23, 2007 P: First of all, are you sure you're not overreacting? Take a deep breath and calm down...I think you may be reading too much into this... As for where do go now? You can go FORWARD girl! You were someone before you met him and you'll be someone if it ends...He is not the reason you live, YOU are! The future is a great thing girl! Don't ever stay because you are afraid to be alone, stay because you love him...Fear can be a powerful thing, but empowerment is even stronger... Maybe I am over reacting, but I left him too many messages telling him that he should call me and tell me what is going on! It is just that as I have said that he is slowly pulling away, or at least it seems. After the day that he told me he was In love with me, after that it seems as if he has been just pulling away, I know it is not my imagination at all. It is bothering me becuase of the situation that I am in with him, I can only call him by cell, I have his e-mail address, not sure he even usues the computer and I can not call him at home. That is why I am flipping out. What is he going to tell me that he lost his cell, that he was sleeping, that he was not feeling well... You can't just not communicate with someone.. without them getting worried. I am just angry about this whole thing... thinking what if this and what if that. I saw him on Sat and it was good. and he called twice on sunday, with no call today... he never misses a day, and athough I was not mean on my messages I know he will take it as I had an attitude.. but what the heck do I have to be sweet all the time? I just simply stated how I felt. What is he in thinking mode? I don't want to wait anylonger for him to think is that selfish, sometimes I feel like I am alone anyway... And I am not afraid to be alone... I have spent so much time alone I could write a book about it... but I don't want to do that any more.
GreenEyedLady Posted January 23, 2007 Posted January 23, 2007 Maybe I am over reacting, but I left him too many messages telling him that he should call me and tell me what is going on! It is just that as I have said that he is slowly pulling away, or at least it seems. After the day that he told me he was In love with me, after that it seems as if he has been just pulling away, I know it is not my imagination at all. It is bothering me becuase of the situation that I am in with him, I can only call him by cell, I have his e-mail address, not sure he even usues the computer and I can not call him at home. That is why I am flipping out. What is he going to tell me that he lost his cell, that he was sleeping, that he was not feeling well... You can't just not communicate with someone.. without them getting worried. I am just angry about this whole thing... thinking what if this and what if that. I saw him on Sat and it was good. and he called twice on sunday, with no call today... he never misses a day, and athough I was not mean on my messages I know he will take it as I had an attitude.. but what the heck do I have to be sweet all the time? I just simply stated how I felt. What is he in thinking mode? I don't want to wait anylonger for him to think is that selfish, sometimes I feel like I am alone anyway... And I am not afraid to be alone... I have spent so much time alone I could write a book about it... but I don't want to do that any more. P: He is MARRIED...he is in SELFISH mode...he will call you when he is able to or gets around to it...the day's not over yet...one day you'll get sick of it and end it...
whichwayisup Posted January 23, 2007 Posted January 23, 2007 After the day that he told me he was In love with me, after that it seems as if he has been just pulling away, I know it is not my imagination at all. Rationally? Cuz he's married, he knows he shouldn't be saying this to you... #1 reason why he's backed off. You're spending alot of time worrying and wasting energy here. I understand that you don't know what is going on, but take a step back, let him call you. Try to keep busy. I know try being the operative word, but still...Try.
Author pricillia Posted January 23, 2007 Author Posted January 23, 2007 Yes he is married... always on my mind always... well this is it... I am not picking up the phone if he calls which I do not think he will. Why should I why..
Porn_Guy Posted January 23, 2007 Posted January 23, 2007 WWIU...you just love the OM/OW forum don't you?
Author pricillia Posted January 23, 2007 Author Posted January 23, 2007 WWIU...you just love the OM/OW forum don't you? Porn Guy... what happened to you, you look a little burnt... leave WWIU alone...
Marielle Posted January 23, 2007 Posted January 23, 2007 Priscilla: I ll talk for myself, but i hope it helps you: I ve cut all ties with him, it's been more than a week. I suffer? yes, I miss him? a bit, I feel empty ? a lot! But all this awful feelings are nothing compare to what I felt during the rollercoaster of the affair: Anxiety: (Where is he, with her?) Depresion: WIll he ever leae her and keep his promise? It was like a horror movie with amazing moments. The most awful part was when we where together, after making love and cuddling...seing him slowly pulling appart giving me those noisy cheek kisses "time to leave kisses" "Alright kisses" while looking for his pants...5-10 min later: he's through the door and all I see is his back...leaving, going to sleep at his house...and me naked and vulnerable in my bed while I hear the wwwrrooooommmm of his jeep speeding like crazy at 2 am. I WILL NEVER RETURN TO THAT!!!! IT hurts like hell. The anxiety you are living now I lived it for 2 years and it is devastating. I m sure by now he called you, or will soon.....but is this a life? Be honest with yourself...is this what you want?
frannie Posted January 23, 2007 Posted January 23, 2007 Porn Guy... what happened to you, you look a little burnt... leave WWIU alone... ........................ lol
frannie Posted January 23, 2007 Posted January 23, 2007 he never misses a day, and athough I was not mean on my messages I know he will take it as I had an attitude.. but what the heck do I have to be sweet all the time? I just simply stated how I felt. Well good for you. And no, you don't have to be sweet all the time. Pricillia it's hard enough being an OW anyway without having to keep a lid on everything you're feeling and thinking. But the natural result of that is that he might have trouble handling what he's creating here... and it's understandable that he might pull away. Give him time and see what he comes back with (assuming he does)... but don't be afraid to be honest about how this feels for you. If you can't be honest about that, then what's the point in being involved with him at all..? This is your life, right..?
Author pricillia Posted January 23, 2007 Author Posted January 23, 2007 Thanks Frannie... I called him last night after he told me he has not called me because I did not return one call on Sunday and that is why he is mad. I left him a message telling him that he knows exactly what he is doing and that he could be mad at me today as well.
frannie Posted January 23, 2007 Posted January 23, 2007 Thanks Frannie... I called him last night after he told me he has not called me because I did not return one call on Sunday and that is why he is mad. Yikes. Did you tell him he's being a big baby..? *slopes off*... sorry...
Je Ne Regrette Rien Posted January 23, 2007 Posted January 23, 2007 ...I second that frannie. Priscilla, do you think he may be trying to cause an argument to deflect his behaviour onto you?
Author pricillia Posted January 23, 2007 Author Posted January 23, 2007 ...I second that frannie. Priscilla, do you think he may be trying to cause an argument to deflect his behaviour onto you? Yes but why?
Je Ne Regrette Rien Posted January 23, 2007 Posted January 23, 2007 Yes but why? Could be a number of reasons: 1) He couldn't make contact and does not want to give you the truthful reason why therefore he makes your NC the issue 2) He needed some time to think/panicked after saying the L word, had a day of thinking then thought he would re-contact but didnt want to say he'd panicked 3) Any reason in the world really, as long as you're the one to blame and he's the one who comes smelling of roses.
Author pricillia Posted January 23, 2007 Author Posted January 23, 2007 Yes but roses have thorns... I who knows if I will decide to go back into the Garden
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