Davis Posted January 22, 2007 Posted January 22, 2007 Today I'm grappling with the thought that my 34 year old ex burned me for no good reason. When we got back from a long New Year's weekend, everything seemed fine. She was acting a little "off" and tried to start some meaningless arguments. Then friday night she went out with the "girls". She got really drunk, kissed with one guy and hooked up with another guy. The 2nd guy is now her "man" according to the email she sent a few days later. In that email she said things like "i never loved you", "he and I have such unbelievable chemistry", "you were really good to me" and "i have no good excuse for the way that I acted". I would never done that to a girlfriend even if I did meet Ms. Right. So why couldn't she just tell me it wasn't working out with us before hand or that we should date other people? Why burn me??
CaliGuy Posted January 23, 2007 Posted January 23, 2007 She's a b*tch!? That's my guess. Normally when women do this, they have checked out of the relationship well before they actually do the deed. My guess is there were some red flags maybe weeks or months ago?
polywog Posted January 23, 2007 Posted January 23, 2007 34 years old??? She sounds 14! It sucks that you have to feel any pain, but I would say she's a mess, and never to open one of her emails again or have Anything to do with her! Let Mr.Chemistry deal with this flaky chick, and just do your best to heal from the sting of her unreasonable punishment. I hate mean people, and she sounds mean.
Author Davis Posted January 23, 2007 Author Posted January 23, 2007 Hey Cal. Not sure. She may have been checking out earlier. You know, relationships kinda go up and down. I think maybe this girl should have been a big red flag. I now know she's an experienced liar and player. She sure "acted" like she was still interested in me. She was even texting me "i love u" before she went out to the bar that night. This is her pattern too. Find a guy, see him for a month while looking for another guy, start dating guy #2 and then guy #1 finds out and goes crazy. What does she care? She always has a guy and another guy chasing her and pining away for her. Hope "Mr. Chemistry" burns her. I know him and he's a player.
DyingHeart Posted January 23, 2007 Posted January 23, 2007 This is her pattern too. Find a guy, see him for a month while looking for another guy, start dating guy #2 and then guy #1 finds out and goes crazy. What does she care? She always has a guy and another guy chasing her and pining away for her. Hope "Mr. Chemistry" burns her. I know him and he's a player. I hate people like that. She sounds really messed up and you deserve better than that. And yes, she'll probably get burned, but your right...what would she care? She's a player, he's a player, let em play each other
shockandawed Posted January 23, 2007 Posted January 23, 2007 Davis, Sorry to hear about your luck, it sucks man..my 40 year old fiance of 3 years broke up with me a week after we got back from a Carribean Cruise in December. Had a ball on the trip..same thing as you, about two days arguing over petty and crazy stuff, I was on some serious eggshells, then doesnt talk to me for a few days, when I finally talk to her a week later, she admits to being in a new relationship. Merry Christmas..... Cali is right, she has probably been checking out long before you knew. Mine was too, while the cruise was amazing, I can now see flags from months ago. You know, it took a month for me to even start realizing what kind of crazy bi((ch she is. All I could think about was the good times. Guess what, I am thinking about the crazy stuff now. They seem similar. Mine is very insecure and afraid of being alone. She sprung from her ex husband to me, saw we werent going to be able to get married for a couple of years and lined up someone else. Her only excuse to me is that this guy doesnt have kid issues. So in her mind, it isn't about who you are in the relationship with, it's strictly the situation. In her case, who can marry her the easiest. She is destined for a lonely life...sucks to be her!!!
polywog Posted January 24, 2007 Posted January 24, 2007 Davi They seem similar. Mine is very insecure and afraid of being alone. She sprung from her ex husband to me, saw we werent going to be able to get married for a couple of years and lined up someone else. Her only excuse to me is that this guy doesnt have kid issues. So in her mind, it isn't about who you are in the relationship with, it's strictly the situation. In her case, who can marry her the easiest. She is destined for a lonely life...sucks to be her!!! Lovers like this are like parasites. They can't be alone and lock onto the next good victim. I speak here as a chick who used to be like this when I was much younger (ashamed to admit it, but hey it's LS true confessions time). Then I got my cute little butt kicked and finally grew up. What blows me away as that the women you guys speak of are Not Young!
Author Davis Posted January 24, 2007 Author Posted January 24, 2007 Hey Poly. Thanks. You're right! And my ex is 34 living like a 22 year old! In fact she actually hangs out with girls that are mostly 22-26 years old. That should have told me something. Apparently my ex cannot be alone. She is the kind of girl that "does not let go of one branch until she has hold of another"! I behaved similarly up to maybe 24 years old. Now I'm in my forties. That was a long time ago. I had a great girfriend back then. I met a blonde hottie and just had to have her. I totally burned my then girlfriend, wouldn't talk to her or give her a response. She didn't know what happened. I burned her bad for no reason except I was a selfish dckhead. The hottie ended up cheating on me and giving me and STD. I should have stayed with the good girl. I should have treated her with more respect and been a better man. That was the end of my cheating, as**hole days and I learned a big lesson. Luckily, I ran into that original girlfriend a few years back. She was happily married with kids. I had the opportunity to tell her that I was really fcked up at that time, that she was a great girlfriend, that I felt guilty for years and years, that I was very sorry for how I treated her, that I had changed and apologized for hurting her like that. That conversation wasn't so much about me, it was about that I had wronged and hurt someone that did nothing to me because I was a young jerk. She loved me and I crushed her. Like I said, I was lucky enough to see her again and that she would listen. Even though it was over 12 years after I dumped her, she was still sweet and seemed happy that I stepped up to the plate and apologized. I hope what they say about karma and that "what comes around goes around" is true. Not to be vindictive, I would love my current ex to have it come back around on her twofold so she knows how it feels.
Woggle Posted January 24, 2007 Posted January 24, 2007 Some women are just emotionally f-cked up in the head. My advice would be to just cut your losses and move on. It has nothing to do with you and everything to do with her. She will probably end up doing the same thing to the new guy.
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