magichands Posted January 21, 2007 Posted January 21, 2007 They can decide on their own now?? When did that evolutionary trait start being displayed? Of course they can't decide on their own. They need emotional support from the clitoris.
whichwayisup Posted January 21, 2007 Posted January 21, 2007 Well I have never slept with a woman on the rebound.. I like men. And that will never change, rebound or not. That's probably because most people don't realize they're gay until later in life and DO have sexual experience with the opposite sex - then they realize they ARE gay, but started off bi until they realized who they were. I have afew gay friends, male and female, so I know abit about this stuff. You're STRAIGHT, bottomline and that is why you don't sleep with the same sex after a break up.
magichands Posted January 21, 2007 Posted January 21, 2007 I've experienced the rebound effect and at no time did it even cross my mind to sleep with a guy. I still say that David Beckham would make you think twice.
magichands Posted January 21, 2007 Posted January 21, 2007 I have afew gay friends, male and female, so I know abit about this stuff. They could be repressed bis. Or in denial of the fact that they're repressed bis.
sb129 Posted January 21, 2007 Posted January 21, 2007 You're STRAIGHT, bottomline and that is why you don't sleep with the same sex after a break up. I sure am. Aren't alot of straight people a little curious though? I would be lying if I said the thought hadn't crossed my mind. But my gaydar is sending out straight signals. I was out last night and my two straight female friends were chatted up by lesbians... they didn't even look at me. I still say that David Beckham would make you think twice. Ew. MH do you fancy David Beckham?
Author useless Posted January 21, 2007 Author Posted January 21, 2007 Remember though, her actions are not about you. She chose to deal with the breakup by screwing a guy. It won't change the fact she's a lesbian and not into men that way. Feelings wise, maybe ALL the feelings are there for you and that is why she didn't allow something physical to happen between the two of you. She doesn't want to lose the friendship. remember though, when she did this we were estranged and completely out of touch. and also she only suspected how I felt since I never really told her. Now, can you handle "just" a friendship? If you can you're gonna have to detach yourself emotionally, enough that you don't "feel" those deep intimate feelings for her. It's real hard and painful to be just friends with someone you're inlove with. Nothing makes sense and you hurt alot. That is where you are now... Exactly. And man does this suck. I was able to detach like that until she dropped the news about her sleeping with a guy. Now it's like the wall I had built around the feelings, which was built on the foundation that she could never sleep with men, has come crashing down since the foundation is no longer there. I don't know that I can deal with it. It's been 3 weeks since she told me and some days it's easier than others but those other days...it's rough. Put all your thoughts down on paper, read it and see how you feel after getting it all out. Take a few days to make sure it makes sense and reads well, then tell her you two need an afternoon to be alone, so you can give her the letter to read, and talk things out. That's what I'm gonna have to do. I hate to make it all so melodramatic and ceremonial though by pulling the old "we have to talk" thing... I realize I'm gonna have to do it sometime though. In the meantime, I do have a date tonight. I tried going on another date 2 weeks ago but it was so soon after she told me about the guy that I couldn't get it out of my mind and pretty much screwed up the date. Hopefully tonight will be better.
whichwayisup Posted January 21, 2007 Posted January 21, 2007 Yeah but most bi's don't say the members of the opposite sex make them sick!
Author useless Posted January 21, 2007 Author Posted January 21, 2007 You're STRAIGHT, bottomline and that is why you don't sleep with the same sex after a break up. so wouldn't it follow then that if you're gay, bottom line is you won't sleep with the opposite sex after a break up?
whichwayisup Posted January 21, 2007 Posted January 21, 2007 I sure am. Aren't alot of straight people a little curious though? I would be lying if I said the thought hadn't crossed my mind. But my gaydar is sending out straight signals. I was out last night and my two straight female friends were chatted up by lesbians... they didn't even look at me. Sure, we're all bi-curious and I think women would probably try a lesbian experience alot more than a man would consider sucking some other guys cock! lol.
magichands Posted January 21, 2007 Posted January 21, 2007 Ew. MH do you fancy David Beckham? It's hopeless whilst Posh is in the picture.
Author useless Posted January 21, 2007 Author Posted January 21, 2007 Yeah but most bi's don't say the members of the opposite sex make them sick! and "real" lesbians who really are repulsed by men won't give guys blow jobs either, rebound or no rebound. lol
sb129 Posted January 21, 2007 Posted January 21, 2007 Useless, I don't think you should be dating until you sort all this out for once and for all. Its not fair on the person you are going on a date with, esp since the other lady is occupying your thoughts 24-7. I thinks its great that you are doing other things, but can't you do them with friends?
whichwayisup Posted January 21, 2007 Posted January 21, 2007 so wouldn't it follow then that if you're gay, bottom line is you won't sleep with the opposite sex after a break up? I don't think it's carved in STONE what someone would or wouldn't do. trying to figure out WHY she screwed a guy when she's lesbian is just crazy. People DO things that don't make sense daily... Her life, her choice.
sb129 Posted January 21, 2007 Posted January 21, 2007 and "real" lesbians who really are repulsed by men won't give guys blow jobs either, rebound or no rebound. lol There are straight women who won't give guys blowjobs either. More fool them.
whichwayisup Posted January 21, 2007 Posted January 21, 2007 I disagree, I think him going out on dates (which aren't serious anyway) to just distract himself and have fun is a good idea. and "real" lesbians who really are repulsed by men won't give guys blow jobs either, rebound or no rebound. lol Yes, but after a bad breakup, people DO things they normally wouldn't do. Maybe she needed to just feel intimacy and have sex. I don't know. But sitting her trying to figure it out, is kind of pointless as we don't know her and what is going on inside her head.
sb129 Posted January 21, 2007 Posted January 21, 2007 It's hopeless whilst Posh is in the picture. Ah shes a twiglet. You could kill her with a flick of your trunk.
Author useless Posted January 21, 2007 Author Posted January 21, 2007 Useless, I don't think you should be dating until you sort all this out for once and for all. Its not fair on the person you are going on a date with, esp since the other lady is occupying your thoughts 24-7. I thinks its great that you are doing other things, but can't you do them with friends? good point but I'm in a new city and have no friends here other than the girl this thread is about. If I wasn't going on this date, I'd just sit in my room and mope all day and night and that won't do me any good either. Oh, not to mention, tonight is The L Word on tv and since the only TV we have is in my room, I'm forced to watch it with herevery freakin Sunday night...so...hopefully I'll be out late enough so I can miss it. lol...that's all I need right now...being forced to watch a show entirely about lesbians while she's sitting right next to me. That is really, really really, not what I need right now.
whichwayisup Posted January 21, 2007 Posted January 21, 2007 There are straight women who won't give guys blowjobs either. More fool them. True. Sad, but true......
Author useless Posted January 21, 2007 Author Posted January 21, 2007 There are straight women who won't give guys blowjobs either. More fool them. right..but my point is that she apparently gave this guy several blowjobs.... I can't see how a real lesbian would do something like that.
whichwayisup Posted January 21, 2007 Posted January 21, 2007 lol...that's all I need right now...being forced to watch a show entirely about lesbians while she's sitting right next to me. That is really, really really, not what I need right now. LOL Ironic that in the show one of the main characters who is obviously LESBIAN is involved and screwing a man...sorry, just throwing in some humour. I do watch that show, it's stupid but entertaining at the sametime.
whichwayisup Posted January 21, 2007 Posted January 21, 2007 can't see how a real lesbian would do something like that. Do yourself a favour, stop wondering. It will drive you nuts more and more if you try to figure out the "why's" of her choices. Maybe she needed something different, a distraction, something which didn't remind her of pussy. Who knows!
sb129 Posted January 21, 2007 Posted January 21, 2007 I disagree, I think him going out on dates (which aren't serious anyway) to just distract himself and have fun is a good idea. . Oh ok. The dating game is a bit different in the US to here I think. I wouldn't want to go on a date with a guy who was still hung up on another woman, but if the date isn't serious, fair enough.
Author useless Posted January 21, 2007 Author Posted January 21, 2007 I don't think it's carved in STONE what someone would or wouldn't do. trying to figure out WHY she screwed a guy when she's lesbian is just crazy. People DO things that don't make sense daily... Her life, her choice. I know....it's just not easy...the natural questions that came to my mind right after she told me were "how...why...what the f*ck...it was supposed to be me...is she really not a lesbian like she claims...???" etc..etc...
sb129 Posted January 21, 2007 Posted January 21, 2007 Useless, does she know you are going on dates? What is her reaction to that?
whichwayisup Posted January 21, 2007 Posted January 21, 2007 Oh ok. The dating game is a bit different in the US to here I think. I wouldn't want to go on a date with a guy who was still hung up on another woman, but if the date isn't serious, fair enough. Yeah, I'm in Canada so I know how the dating game goes...lol Not in an igloo though... He can still go out and have fun. Many people who date can date without having it go serious. He needs the ego boost, experience and fun. As long as he doesn't have sex with someone on the first date, why shouldn't he date casually? Be upfront and say he's not into a serious relationship...
Recommended Posts