DuRaS27 Posted January 20, 2007 Posted January 20, 2007 Here it is: "Just a Warning DO NOT get too involved with her. For your own health, stay as far away from her as possible. No, I am not threatening you, but I'm warning you that she's not good for anyone. You probably won't read this whole thing, and you probably won't believe it no matter what, but I've got to give you some sort of warning. She is a cheater and a really good liar. Want to know how good of a liar she is? I've only once caught her in a lie. She tells half-truths, so when you realize something she said was false, she can weasel her way out and convince you that she DID tell you the truth, that you weren't listening. or maybe that she thought she told you something you didn't quite hear. Once a cheater, always a cheater. Here are the situations where she cheated on people: 1. Brendan, her first serious boyfriend. She cheated on him with PJ. Both PJ and Brendan say that she had sex with PJ. Their myspaces are available here: http://www.myspace.com/<removed> http://www.myspace.com/<removed> Her story is that PJ attempted to rape her. Funny how she's still friends with him and still allows him to go to her house despite the attempted rape. It's likely that neither PJ nor Brendan will want to get involved, but you can always try messaging them. I'm sure it won't hurt--well it might. 2. Me, her second and longest lasting serious boyfriend. She went to a party with her friend Evan (who she still hangs out with) and "loves". Her story was that he attempted to rape her. He IMed me a few months after her and I broke up to come clean with this: (R384gja450 is me, PaPache is Evan and he still uses that AIM name if you wish to confirm any of this[note that it has been changed for loveshack]) (21:46:15) PaPache: well you know what (21:46:35) R384gja450: what? (21:46:35) PaPache: if you'll hear it i want to tell you my side of the story....of two things (21:46:44) R384gja450: sure (21:46:56) PaPache: k (21:47:03) PaPache: the one night at my brothers house (21:47:24) PaPache: i was hammered (21:47:39) PaPache: she comes has one beer (21:47:46) PaPache: i go upstairs she follows (21:47:54) PaPache: im crying for her to come lay next to me (21:48:31) R384gja450: go on (21:48:47) PaPache: so she does and start trying to make out with her shes resisting but not resisting (21:48:52) PaPache: a (21:48:56) PaPache: no no evan stop (21:49:06) PaPache: but not doing anything to stop me really other then turning her head (21:49:16) R384gja450: uh huh (21:50:11) PaPache: and i dont remember all of it but i remember eventually im like trying like hell to get it up and insert and she just keeps saying your gonna hate me your gonna hate me (21:50:34) PaPache: i hear someone coming up the stairs and i snap too, and realized what i was doing (21:50:42) R384gja450: she had her pants off? (21:51:00) PaPache: 99% sure maybe not off but down (21:51:23) PaPache: then in the morning i played dumb told her i ddin't remember any of it It took her a day to tell me that he'd attempted to rape her. She will definitely tell you that Evan hates me, and maybe he does, but at this point he and I had made peace. I later confronted her about this conversation and she got upset, made me feel like the bad guy, and hung up on me. Remember that this conversation occured a few months after her and I broke up. She was dating a new guy, a guy that she'd started dating less than a week after me, and she was making ME feel like the bad guy. 3. Kevin Crosdale. This was a less serious boyfriend she had. She claimed to me that he was not a boyfriend. You see, her and I had this deal that she wasn't supposed to have a boyfriend until she got back to school. So in essence, the fact that he was her boyfriend was almost like cheating on me. But that's beside the point. Right after school started her and I were supposed to get back together, that had been the plan since the day we broke up, but we didn't. Eventually I got upset, called her a whore, and told her I never wanted to see her again. Kevin came to visit her one weekend. The day after, she called me 14 times, slipped a note under my dorm room door (which I will scan into my computer to show you), and sent me an email. The next day, I decided to break silence with her and I talked to her in the hallway before one of her classes. We hugged and agreed to meet for lunch. We met, went back to my room, started making out, and we had sex. So precisely two days after Kevin visited her, spent hundreds of dollars, she came to my room and cheated on him. Not even once did she ever say anything about how badly she felt for Kevin--however you can see in her note that she was afraid of what people would think when they found out she'd broken his heart too. She didn't even care about him, only the way she looked. At that moment she loved me, but didn't care about me. There's plenty more bad stories to tell about her. For example, the first night I met her, she had a boyfriend named Chris (who she started dating when Brendan and her broke up). At the same time, she was dating a guy named Mark. I remember being really interested in her that night, but being discouraged at the site of her making out with Mark. Later that night, he decided he was more interested in other guys than he was in her. At that moment, her heart was broken. I convinced her that she would feel better if we went out in the forest and looked at the fireflies. We went there, made out, and I fingerbanged her. Later that week she cut it off with Chris and Mark. Don't tell yourself that Chris wasn't serious--he cried when she broke up with him. Mark was just gay and didn't care. I'm sure if you're anything like me you won't like this analogy, but I guess what I'm trying to do here is give you a carfax on her. You deserve to know what's wrong with her and her past. I wish someone had done this for me, though I doubt it would have mattered. Even then I would have stayed with her thinking, "I'm just doing it for the sex". That's what I did when her and I started dating again and she cheated on Kevin with me. I knew that eventually she was going to break my heart again, but I was just doing it for the sex. I can tell you that it hurt just as much when she ended it with me for the last time, and found a new guy the day after. I'm sure you think I'm doing this for myself. Yes, I am--absolutely I am. I want to see that bitch get what she deserves. I honestly loved her and believed her when she told me she wanted to get married. She told those same things to Brendan--and then told me she never had any intentions of marrying him. I'm sure she's told you the same thing about me. She is a deceitful bitch that only cares about herself. She's about as far from altruistic as you can get. Calling her a decent person is like calling a priest that molests little boys a god Christian. She WILL cheat on you this spring. Every weekend she goes out and gets drunk at college. Brendan will tell you that she does not care about guys' feelings. She thinks she can just **** around with our feelings and it's nothing. You're 26 years old, and I'm sure you know what it's like to be cheated on. It's the worst ****ing feeling in the world when you find out your trust has been so betrayed. She is a master at making herself look innocent and lying. Here's an example: When her and I first broke up we weren't supposed to have a boyfriend or girlfriend. A week later, I noticed this guy who she was dating (Kevin)--his myspace said, "in a relationship". I asked her, "why does this say, "in a relationship"?" She replied without flinching, "well there's these fat girls that he can't stand--he wants them to stop bothering him so he changed his myspace." A little over a month ago, Kevin changed his profile to "single". I asked her why he'd done this simultaneously at the same time she told him it was over and she said, "well because HE thought we were in a relationship". So I said, "but you told me before that it was because of the fat girls." Finally she came out with the truth, "well I didn't want you to know what was really going on." She was lying to me, and she was good at it. Think she's lost this ability? Whenever I start thinking that she isn't really a cheater (or liar), and would never have cheated on me, and wouldn't cheat on anyone else, I go back to this story: This summer my family and I took a vacation out to Maine. We drove in three cars, my Toyota, my father's BMW, and my brother in law's Ford. When we stopped for gas once, my father said, "you guys were going too fast!" We were going about 78--however he told us that we were going 83. So once we got back on the road we drove about the same speed limit and he called us on the cell phone. "How fast are you going?" he asked. "78, I said." "No way, you're going 83! Your speedometers must be wrong." He made a similar call to my brother in law. When we got to Maine we all discussed the issue. He decided that it must be that BOTH of our cars are five miles per hour off. His precious BMW, his precious girl, couldn't have been lying to him. You're college educated so you MUST know how this relates to you. And if you don't (and you should probably kll yourself due to stupidity if you don't) then here's a translation: My dad loves his BMW. Nothing could EVER be wrong with his BMW. So when we told him it was 5 MPH off, he didn't believe it. More than likely, you won't read my message, and if you do, you won't take it to heart. I know myself that I wouldn't take it to heart. But at least I will send this message and the day that she finally gets bored with you, you'll realize that I Was right. Maybe one day, together, we can help someone else avoid this whore. Do I honestly care about you? Isn't this some attempt at undermining a relationship and hurting her? Absolutely NOT. I care for someone in your position. My advice: Get away as fast as possible. That cute co-worker makes a pass at you? Well, you know what to do. This girl will suck you in and make you think that you're her world. You're not, she doesn't even care about you. Why do I care? Because it happened to me, and it's hard not to sympathize with someone in the same situation." Honestly, I have no concern over her abilities as a female. I don't think she could make my existance any more miserable than it is. The way I see it, this note won't break up their relationship. However, it might create mistrust, which could lead to a breakup. That would make me very happy.
Grrlish Posted January 20, 2007 Posted January 20, 2007 DuRaS27: Write all of these letters you possibly can. Do not send them. Burn them. Delete them. Save them. Whatever. This will only create all kinds of bad karma for YOU, and contribute to the existing over-abundance of drama crap in the Universe. And You will look just like the psycho jealous ex. This letter makes you look obsessed. Let it go. Sh*tty things happen in life and sometimes they happen to us. Move along and find a wonderful gal to replace the cheater. What goes around, comes around. To her, and to you. Find more pleasant thing with which to occupy your time, mind and heart.
westernxer Posted January 20, 2007 Posted January 20, 2007 "Just a Warning... If I can't have her, no one will.
Guest Posted January 20, 2007 Posted January 20, 2007 Just let it go, don't worry about him/her, and find a nice, honest cute girl to spend some time with.
jusified Posted January 20, 2007 Posted January 20, 2007 Leave the new guy alone, his innoncent. Even if he isn't, he will discover who she is soon enough. If his an arse then all will balance out in the end. Go on with your life and find someone better and new. Then the ex will be nothing but a memory.
Star Gazer Posted January 20, 2007 Posted January 20, 2007 Ohhhh mmmyyyyy looorrrddddieeeee. Someone needs help.
silentcharon Posted January 20, 2007 Posted January 20, 2007 Yes. Why do you care? The guy will get the crappy end of the stick sooner or later, and it'll be entirely up to him to bail or not. Just be thankful he took her off your hands.
Author DuRaS27 Posted January 20, 2007 Author Posted January 20, 2007 It seems as though everyone is assuming I'm doing this because I hate this guy: No I do not at all! I hate HER. I want her to suffer. She really likes this guy, so I want HER to suffer. This isn't a case of "if I can't have her no one will" this is a case of "she's a horrible person and I want her to be punished". The simple truth is this: I know that her and I are definitely not meant for each other. That doesn't excuse her behavior during the course of our relationship, however. I never treated her as badly as to cheat on her, lie to her, or any of the above. I'll admit that I wasn't by any means the best boyfriend. But I wasn't a bad boyfriend whereas she was the worst kind of girlfriend you could possibly ask for. I'm honestly glad our break up happened and it makes me happy that such a piece of trash will no longer have me in her life. The only thing I miss at all is the sex, and even that I remember was pretty horrible because she wasn't good in bed. Was I good in bed? Not really, but I had no experience whereas she had a ton. At least I had an excuse.
sb129 Posted January 20, 2007 Posted January 20, 2007 Yes. Why do you care? The guy will get the crappy end of the stick sooner or later, and it'll be entirely up to him to bail or not. Just be thankful he took her off your hands. I totally agree. Its none of your business now. And it is NOT up to you to "show" your ex's new man how "bad" she is. There is no way he will believe you... You sound really bitter and twisted. Why focus on them so much? Focus on YOU. You are the better person, walk away and let yourself move on. It seems as though everyone is assuming I'm doing this because I hate this guy: No I do not at all! I hate HER. I want her to suffer. She really likes this guy, so I want HER to suffer. This isn't a case of "if I can't have her no one will" this is a case of "she's a horrible person and I want her to be punished". The simple truth is this: I know that her and I are definitely not meant for each other. That doesn't excuse her behavior during the course of our relationship, however. I never treated her as badly as to cheat on her, lie to her, or any of the above. I'll admit that I wasn't by any means the best boyfriend. But I wasn't a bad boyfriend whereas she was the worst kind of girlfriend you could possibly ask for. I'm honestly glad our break up happened and it makes me happy that such a piece of trash will no longer have me in her life. The only thing I miss at all is the sex, and even that I remember was pretty horrible because she wasn't good in bed. Was I good in bed? Not really, but I had no experience whereas she had a ton. At least I had an excuse. Mate, if you send those letters, he will show her, and she will assume you aren't over her. Rather than making her suffer, that will probably give her a perverse sense of satisfaction. Is that what you want? When I broke up with an ex, he sent my mum an email warning her of what a terrible person I was.... it made him sound like he was deranged (he was!!) and my mum was horrified... but it didn't put her off me!! She is still my mum, and we haven't split up.. If you ignore her, get on with your life, and become a happy person, that will bug her more in the long run.
RocketMan2 Posted January 20, 2007 Posted January 20, 2007 Imagine you started going out with some new girl, youre completely infatuated with her. Then you get that letter from her ex. Id probably call the cops. I wouldn't contact him at all, but if you REALLY feel compelled to, i wouldnt write it anything like that. As youve said, you want to hurt her, and youre trying to use this new guy to do it. Hows he gonna feel that youre trying to split them up? If you want to warn him, as a man to man friendly thing, then you should appeal to him on his level. That letter does not. That letter sounds bitter and angry (which im sure is how you feel). Dont add to the drama, it will only prolong and worsen your hurt. Write as many letters as you want. but then burn them.
Porn_Guy Posted January 20, 2007 Posted January 20, 2007 Ohhhh mmmyyyyy looorrrddddieeeee. Someone needs help. you're tell me SG!!
Road Rage Posted January 20, 2007 Posted January 20, 2007 DuRaS27, All you are doing is speculating that the past equals the future. This new guy of hers may bring out a different side of her and inspire maturity in her. One day she may feel compelled to apolgize for the way she may have treated you. One man`s trash is another man`s treasure. Let her go in peace and try to forgive any wrong she may have done you.
daphne Posted January 20, 2007 Posted January 20, 2007 Dura, I don't think your intentions are particularly pure. You don't care about the guy. You just want to hurt your ex. It sounds like she's nuts, but honestly your letter makes you look psycho. Don't send it. If he was a friend of yours you could tell him and your intentions would be good but you're not doing it out of altruism. I know you feel like sounding the bell that your ex is horrible relationship material after what you've been through, but it's best for you and your mental health to just move on and hope he stays with her for a long time. She's out of your hair now and can't hurt you anymore. Stay away from teh both of them.
lorr Posted January 20, 2007 Posted January 20, 2007 Your putting way too much energy and time into something that doesn't concern you anymore. As the saying goes "Let sleeping dogs lie"
Davis Posted January 20, 2007 Posted January 20, 2007 Duras, I am in the exact same situation as you and I'm 42 years old. It happened about two weeks ago. I found out she was with another guy and she didn't know that I knew. My friend Chrissy told me that my ex deserved NOTHING. No calls, no emails, no communication because she's a total piece of sht. So I decided that I did not want a woman that was going to be out partying AND screwing around with other guys. I could never trust her and she would never change. I quit calling her. My silence was the message. She emailed me a few days later with her dear john email. What a crock of sht. You have to tell yourself that YOU made the choice, that YOU were not willing to put up with her behavior and you wouldn't be treated like that anymore. The ONLY thing you can do is retain your dignity and your self respect. You can only do that by never communicating with her again. DO NOT send any letters. You will be chasing her (which she will enjoy). Do you want that? You will look like a fool and a psycho. DO not contact her. DO not respond if she contacts you. If she calls, hang up. YOU are DONE with her. She is such a piece of sht, she does not even deserve any response from you. Move forward bud. I know you may not believe this, but this will open a door for you for a much better girl.
MOMMIE Posted January 20, 2007 Posted January 20, 2007 DuRa, i hate it for you...I really do, but it sounds like you still feel something for her....please don't send the letter because it sounds crazy...just let her go...she sounds terrible.....I know it hurts, but you've got to "let it burn
lone56wolf Posted January 20, 2007 Posted January 20, 2007 She's not going to suffer. If she's that type, she'll just move on to the next guy - and you're going to end up looking like the vindictive ex. Sure, the fellah she's with is going to get hurt. He's going to hurt a lot more if he does like most of us do and ignores the letter, hears her opinion of you - then finds out it was truth. Wolf
RecordProducer Posted January 20, 2007 Posted January 20, 2007 If all that is true, DO send it. He won't believe you, but when he recognizes something in her behavior, he will think about your letter.
Author DuRaS27 Posted January 21, 2007 Author Posted January 21, 2007 It's funny how two of you have called me Dura... I'm Duras! It's a character on Star Trek. Yep, I'm probably never getting laid again. Anyway, thanks for all the responses. Honestly, I have written many, many similar letters to her, her boyfriends, the guys she's dated, and so far I haven't sent any. Usually I either delete them or forget about them. Yesterday I was drunk and piss off, so I was really thinking of doing it, but I didn't.
sb129 Posted January 21, 2007 Posted January 21, 2007 Thats good. Writing the letters can be really therapeutic- don't stop doing that... Just don't send them.
MOMMIE Posted January 21, 2007 Posted January 21, 2007 Duras....sorry about the name thing....never really cared for star trek so it didn't ring a bell or anything....surely you don't mean that's the reason you won't be getting sex...?????.... :lmao: ..anyway, glad you didn't send the letter;
al8765 Posted January 21, 2007 Posted January 21, 2007 I think it is a good idea to write the letters but don't send them. Lately I've just been talking to my dog about everything. Anyways, I know you said she doesn't deserve anyone but maybe she'll find someone just like her. Its funny how things come around.
Rooster_DAR Posted January 21, 2007 Posted January 21, 2007 If I can't have her, no one will. .........:laugh::laugh::laugh:
whichwayisup Posted January 21, 2007 Posted January 21, 2007 Lately I've just been talking to my dog about everything. Now that is funny! You just made me laugh out loud for real!! Dur, whatever you do, DO NOT send ANY letters or emails. You will regret it. It's one thing to wish hateful sheeyot on someone, mess up their life, but it's another to act upon it. I'm sure you don't ever want someone from your past messing and getting involved in your life, putting off people, right? So, as much as you want her to hurt, the best revenge is to live well. Forget her, it doesn't matter anymore!! Say it with me, IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER.
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