Guest Posted February 21, 2007 Posted February 21, 2007 How is it that this guy is to blame for any of this MARRIED WOMAN'S feelings? Initially they both wanted it, the happenings was a beginning of the affair. This lady was smitten - He said he wanted out - But he didn't. He gave all the signs he did, he played with her feelings for his own ego boost! How cruel is that? Because of these actions, this lady's feelings grew deeper. These people act like this - You make sure you give vibes - Then let them down - Then turn the vibes on again. Totally spiralling the emotions of the other for their own self satisfaction. It's a warped game! I've been there and seen what happens - I saw the game this man played, and when I twigged, he could not look me in the face! He ceased waving, smiling, calls, e-mails, talking.... That's guilt! Had I not, he would still be continueing with his game - He got caught out! I did not bombard this man, I reported him - Result? I got a letter telling me to not go anywhere near him as he's very professional. I had all the proof there, but they didn't want it. I will stand my ground with this lady, and I will stand by who the wrong one was in this issue. I don't justify this lady being married and doing it, make that clear.
lover's rock Posted February 21, 2007 Posted February 21, 2007 Okay I took the time to read this whole thread so I think that I deserve a chance to respond. Yes, she's married, we know this. We could all say she shouldn't have done it. We could say that the guy wised up. But I really don't think the problem is that she was married. I think the problem was that she came on too strong. Let this be a lesson to you.
Impudent Oyster Posted February 22, 2007 Posted February 22, 2007 What's so hard to understand? He's a 27 year old guy who went out on a date (ONE DATE) with an older, married mother then came to his senses and realized that he didn't want to get involved in that mess. I'm sure you scared him, because your actions sound scarey to me. Seriously, you're making it sound like the romance of the century when it was nothing and yes, you ARE embarassing yourself and frankly, you sound unhinged. You are a flirtation for him and nothing more, snap out of it and act like the wife, mother and adult you are before he gets you fired for harassment.
MoonGirl Posted February 22, 2007 Posted February 22, 2007 I agree - you came on WAY too strong. Try reading, "Why Men Love B*tches." It is a superb, hilarious read and ALL true! You were laying yourself down like a psycho doormat for this guy. Any woman who would do that would certainly loose a man's respect and admiration.
herenow Posted February 22, 2007 Posted February 22, 2007 [quote=Guest;1097142 This lady was smitten - He said he wanted out - But he didn't. I will stand my ground with this lady, and I will stand by who the wrong one was in this issue. Not that this matters anymore because she has been fired from her job, but it is very clear to me that he did want out. Anyone who goes to management and risks their own job to get someone to leave them alone, wants out. The question is: Out of what? There was no relationship. This guy made a big mistake letting such a stalker into his life. He may have paid for that mistake with his job, but he knew it was a mistake the very next day. I'm sure he didn't want anymore scenes at work and tried to handle it by being nice. She is the one who continued to pursue him to the point that he couldn't take it anymore. It was worth risking his own job to get rid of her. Seems like he was being truthful and I see nothing wrong with that.
lovernotafighter Posted February 22, 2007 Posted February 22, 2007 I agree - you came on WAY too strong. Try reading, "Why Men Love B*tches." It is a superb, hilarious read and ALL true! You were laying yourself down like a psycho doormat for this guy. Any woman who would do that would certainly loose a man's respect and admiration. this book is awesome!!! jacquesette you went way way wAy off the deep end on this. even if you weren't married your behavior was like a stalker. when you come to your senses you owe that guy a apology.
MinstrelGirl Posted February 22, 2007 Posted February 22, 2007 Here I am as a member I don't think she should have got fired for being lead on. She plainly put it to this guy if you want me to back off I will, but he gave signals and remarks to make her come to him more. They spent the night in his apartment, ok as friends....When the lady explained how it made her feel, did he stop her there and then? No, he continued to agree with everything she said. From her point of view, he was sharing similar feeling. At the point he wanted out, he should have plainly said...Instead of later, smiling, yes it was special, meet me in your lunch hour...Nothing! It was inevitable she was going to think there was more. When a guy did this to me - He called me and said, 'I think your really nice, meet me in my lunch hour,' so me like a twit did...He then told his boss I was harrassing him, I got penalised. Erm, did I instigate the meeting? Harrassing is being intrusive on someone when it causes harm to that someone, not when they both want it. Not the case in this story, he wanted it. His thinking changed because of the strength of her emotion, the only way to cease it was to get her out by doing something cruel, because he knew he had gone too far. Succeeded! Darn coward! Just saying it has a been there done that member
YoMomma Posted February 23, 2007 Posted February 23, 2007 To the OP, just a suggestion if you work for a large company they usually offer free couseling via Employee Health Services.
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