WHAT is going on here??!

[Guest]

Ok. I met this guy through work, we knew each other for a few months and had (what I thought to be) a mild flirtation/interest in each other. After I lightly suggested that we hang out sometime, he asked me out and we had a date. After that, things skyrocketed and for the last 2 weeks we've spent maybe 6 or 7 days together (after work or sometimes even the whole day on the weekend). He is 32, Im 24.

Things were going great and even though I knew things were going fast I liked it so I didnt mind. Let me add however that I have a HORRIBLE time reading his body language. He will look the other direction when talking to me sometime, and he has this sense of humor where he is constantly joking but looks serious (so he says) and its hard for me to tell how to take him. He also seemed to talk about how scared he was over things happening so fast, which I didnt understand...I almost wanted to say 'chill out!'

Well as of the other night, we had a conversation and differences in religious beliefs came up. I am the same religion as him, but he has different views on some issues than I do. To me, its not a huge deal. To him, it seemed it was, and after we talked he said that he thought that that was it between us (in his own words, I dont remember verbatim). I said, seriously? And he said, 'you don't?' and I said, no not at all. So then, suddenly, things were seemingly fine again. (?) THe next day I saw him at work in passing and things seemed fine but I was a little weirded out by everything, but he called me that night anyway.

Well this morning going to work he came up to me on the subway and we started talking. I brought up a conversation that I had misunderstood, but before I realized that, I was a little ticked off, so I told him. He cleared it up, and then said to me, 'I think you need some space'. I thought- what?? How can he tell me how I feel? Well I told him that, and basically he started apologizing and said he just thought things were going fast and don't I need some time to think about thigns? I said, no...do you? He said no.

So the rest of the trip I clammed up b/c I was so freakin confused. He kept asking me what was wrong and playing with my hair and seeming concerned. THen he said to me, ay, we are nowhere, and I said what? when did this happen? and he said all of a sudden. So Im thinking- huh? I was seriously confused all morning when I was with him. THEN, when we get to work, he asks me to go get a bagel with him, and while we're doing that hes holding my hand and kissing my head. ?? When we got back into school, he sends me a text saying hes sorry, that he wasnt expecting this to happen, that he loves spending time with me, but that hes also afraid it will work out. I responded 'you mean that it WONT work out?', and he said no, that it WILL. Then he asked me to meet him after work.

After work we met up, and I said I didnt understand his texts, and he said that there are barriers between us- he is speaking of the language barrier (we are of differnet cultures), and he said that I just misunderstood him all morning due to the language barrier. He said that he is scared b/c he feels that this is really going to go somewhere, when he thinks of the future he sees it working out, and that its scary. I said than what were you talking about this morning? And he said not to take him seriously, that he is fine and if Im fine, then great.

Then we were getting coffee, and he mentions a) dont I deserve someone better than him? (to which I said- what??! Why are you bringing this up?) and b) how long has it been, 2 weeks? To which I said, something like that, why? And he said nothing. Then when he was leaving, he said I will see you someday and kissed my forehead, then when he saw I was confused, he came back and kissed me for real.

 

WHAT THE H** is going on here? Part of me wants to believe what he says because he seems like a good guy and sincere. But part of me is still confused as anything and wonders if he doesnt want things to continue but is too chicken to do anything about it. I keep saying, if you dont want to see me anymore, then just tell me! but he says he does. Ive given him the opportunity plenty of times to just come out and tell me, but he hasnt, so does he want to end thigns?

I just really dont get it, and if it continues like this i AM going to end it. Im goin to give him space and he can call me if he misses me, but I just dont know what to think here...