Spoonandfork22 Posted January 16, 2007 Posted January 16, 2007 well the past month with all the bf BS has been a rollercoaster. We have been really good but I think I have a 'delayed relationship'. THis is what i mean... with my ex boyfriend i was head over heels in love with him. we said i love you after nearly 4 months together and i meant it throughout our entire relationship. i remember not being able to control saying it, it was just right, and i wanted nothing more then to be with him. current SO....not so much. although i adore him, i feel myself distancing, becoming more like a friend then a gf. Dont get me wrong I am still the devoted gf but not at all to the degree that I was to my ex, or how i was in the beginning of our relationship. im wondering if this is due to the situation that has occured between me and my current bf or because i have grown up and have learned that love isnt something to rush. i dont want to be in a relationship where i resent the person and pull away instead of move forward. i want to be wtih my bf but i really have all these emotions i dont understand. i feel no need to tell him i love him...i question our relationship, i question his motives and i still question him & that girl, who messed this all up for me. i want to believe everything he says. i want to trust him, to believe him when he tells me where hes been, what hes doing that night, etc. everyone always says trust your gut. ive done that a few times. once i was right, another time i was wrong and ruined my relationship because of it. i know my bf picks up on this. he asks me all the time "why are you being quiet" or "whats going on? youre acting wierd" in whcih i always say "im fine" because weve talked about this so many times its frusterating for the both of us and its like a broken record. plus, i cant even sort out my own feelings right now. am i doomed here?
kitten chick Posted January 16, 2007 Posted January 16, 2007 Maybe I don't know your situation enough but why do you resent him? One other question, was your ex that you speak about falling in love with so fast your first love?
Author Spoonandfork22 Posted January 16, 2007 Author Posted January 16, 2007 i resent him because he lied to me about a girl (his sort of ex) that he was still talking to and leading on behind my back (you can see the story in some of my started threads) the ex i fell in love w. so fast wasnt my first love, although we were together two years. i think i was with him with my blinders on. im at a point where i dont trust anyone. it seems everytime i put my heart out there i am dissapointed.
kitten chick Posted January 17, 2007 Posted January 17, 2007 Sorry spoonandfork22, I'm at a loss. I don't know what to say besides welcome to the club. I wish I knew how to help you. Trust is a very fickle friend.
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