Darkwall Posted January 15, 2007 Posted January 15, 2007 My boyfriend and I just broke up a month ago. We were together 2 years. A good male friend of mine HANK has a friend "BOB" whom my ex and I both know, but not well. Although I'm interested in Bob, he's not the reason for the break up. Bob did ask my ex on a few occasions "how I was doing". This bothered my ex a little. I think he was intimidated by him. Hank is my only way of seeing bob and helping me to set something up. Hank knows I'm interested in getting to know Bob but chooses to not get involved in fear that my ex will think he instigated the break up. Hank, Bob and my ex have become mutual friends. My question is... How do I set something up or get Bob to ask me out without involving Hank directly?
magichands Posted January 15, 2007 Posted January 15, 2007 My question is... How do I set something up or get Bob to ask me out without involving Hank directly? Your life is too complicated. Hire a private detective to track Bob down, and deliver your hand-written confession of lust.
Author Darkwall Posted January 15, 2007 Author Posted January 15, 2007 magic, that's not very nice. Do you have any other ideas?
Sand&Water Posted January 15, 2007 Posted January 15, 2007 RE: I believe you shouldn't involve your ex, at all, Darkwall. The whole idea is just very unappealing. IF you do decide to involve him, be ready to tackle a whole bowl full of intertwined worms. Messy. Plus, adding the ex into the picture makes you look like you can't do anything on your own. He will think, you are being an inconsiderate woman, who can't do anything right without somehow coming off as selfish -in a sense. Try to find another route around this situation. I am sure, you can someway or another obtain his telephone number or e-mail. Or, be patient [ -he might come around]. One should take into account the implications. That is all. Regards, Sand&Water
magichands Posted January 15, 2007 Posted January 15, 2007 magic, that's not very nice. You got some great advice from Sand&Water. (Except that she possibly doesn't understand that you're only "involving" the ex tenuously, but nobody's perfect.) Now shut up.
blind_otter Posted January 15, 2007 Posted January 15, 2007 The whole thing sounds messy as heck. I would personally wait a while because, being that bob is a mutual friend, it would just look SO BAD to start dating him too soon after your breakup. It would look like you left your EX for Bob.
Author Darkwall Posted January 15, 2007 Author Posted January 15, 2007 ok ok magic. I'll just wait 'till the time is right and take the bull by the horns.
magichands Posted January 15, 2007 Posted January 15, 2007 I would personally wait a while because, being that bob is a mutual friend, it would just look SO BAD to start dating him too soon after your breakup. It would look like you left your EX for Bob. Yeah, maybe wait until next Tuesday. On the other hand, who has the time or energy to worry about what everybody else thinks?? Especially ex-nobodys.
magichands Posted January 15, 2007 Posted January 15, 2007 I'll just wait 'till the time is right and take the bull by the horns. I'd prefer you took the elephant by the tusks. Your choice.
Author Darkwall Posted January 15, 2007 Author Posted January 15, 2007 Yeah, maybe wait until next Tuesday. On the other hand, who has the time or energy to worry about what everybody else thinks?? Especially ex-nobodys. I agree strongly, but I'm not cold hearted either. Just looking for happiness.
magichands Posted January 15, 2007 Posted January 15, 2007 I agree strongly, but I'm not cold hearted either. Just looking for happiness. Leave no rock unturned.
Author Darkwall Posted January 15, 2007 Author Posted January 15, 2007 Leave no rock unturned. that can sometimes be tricky especially when someone just doesn't get it.
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