hes making me think about him

[rach-k]

hello, this is my first post!

basically i was with my ex for a year and a half, we lived together for a year, went on 3 holidays together, he was my first love ect. towards the end i had a problem trusting him, he would text other girls and lie to me about it and spent alot of time with one girl in particular even though he knew she liked him. he ended up spliting up with my and days later was with this other girl, they spent all their time together and she was always at his house. we are all in the same college and it got to the point where i walked into a room so the girl was all over my ex, i walked out and my friend ended up fighting with her. my ex ran after me and we ended up getting on and he said him and this girl had agreed nothing would happen anymore.

over the next month we became close again,going out together and still sleeping together, he was even telling me he still loved me and how much he missed me. i was crazy about him and really wanted him back. as i was giong away over xmas i decided not to talk about it until i got back. he even asked me to go and see him the morning i left and he was hugging and kissing me. i spoke to him abit while i was away, him saying he still loved and missed me all the time. out of nowhere on boxing day i got a text from him, he said that being away from me had helped him moved on so he was with the first girl again. i can not explain how heartbroke i was and decided not to speak to him. he would not stop mithering me, saying he needed to explain things and talk to me. he was constantly ringing and texting until i agreed to him coming round on new year.

we stayed in my room for hours both crying and talking. he said he had wanted to get back with me but didnt think it was what i wanted but then said at the time he had wanted this girl more. he also said that right then he wanted to be with me but that it wasnt that easy considering the situation. he said he would come round the next day to talk to me about it. i was so unbelivably upset, i ended up getin drunk and having a one night stand. when he asked me the next day i was honest about what had happened, he went mad saying nothing could ever happen between us again because of it, even though it was ok for him to have a GIRLFRIEND. we ended up screaming at each other and he went home in tears. that was the last time we actually spoke.

i spent the holidays alone and just cried my eyes out, i was terrified of going back to college and seeing them together. i spent more time with friends and was beginning to move on slightly until one night my phone went of at all hours, it was him. he had text me just to say 'he let what we had go to waste, it was special and he will probably never have it again but he hopes i do because i deserve it' i didnt reply but spent the next day crying about it and couldnt stop thinking about him again. my freinds really helped and once again, just as i had begin to move on he does it again.

it was my birthday on friday and i got another text from him. it said happy birthday, are you ok now ect. but at the end he had put 'will you text me bak, im abit upset just thinkin bout how much better it was last year' im in bits again. i dont understand why hes doing this. just to let you know he is actually happy with this girl, they never leave each others side and his friends have told me they spend ALL their time together. there are a few things i dont understand, how he can move on so quickly (he basically jumped out of my bed and into hers) and if he has moved on why am i geting these texts. he can say things like that but when iv actually seen him he wont even look at me. i miss him so much and i think it would be ok if i never had to see him again but we live so close, and i have to see him with her in college and sit near him in lessons. its so hard to forget about it all. HELP i would really appriciate any advice. xx

[bluechocolate]

In reply to his happy birthday text, just say

 

thank you. i'm fine.

 

Nothing more. If he continues to send you texts you may have to ask him to stop or you could just block his number & email address. Seeing him in college? You'll just have to tough that one out for the time being.

[ratingsguy]

From what you're saying here, it sounds like you have to lose this guy. He either can't make up his mind or he's a twotimer. Either way, it's not creating a postive relationship for you, so I say it's time to move on.

[Okeydokey]

dont respond to the text or any other communications. read the excellent post by no foolin something like "a guide for the long walk". it applies even if you go to school together. when you can pretend not to see him. when you can't smile, your busy, and move on your merry way. so manipulative to send you that b'day note. wants to keep you hanging on, but doesnt want to invest. move on.