norajane Posted January 13, 2007 Posted January 13, 2007 Hard to tell...too much wine last night. But he ran out of here this morning without even coffee, so I guess that's that. Had to be done. I called him out on a lie I recently discovered. Something he hid from me back when we first started dating...another woman, of course. "I'm sorry I hid things from you," he said. Right.
shockandawed Posted January 13, 2007 Posted January 13, 2007 Norajane, I just met you yesterday but I know your kind words to me meant alot. Anything you need to vent just get it out. Take care of yourself!!!
Storyrider Posted January 13, 2007 Posted January 13, 2007 Sorry to hear it. How long had you been together? I seem to remember you two had known each other a long time ago and rekindled things more recently?
magichands Posted January 13, 2007 Posted January 13, 2007 I'm sorry, norajane. If it had to be done, then it had to be done. I guess. Hard to tell...too much wine last night. But he ran out of here this morning without even coffee, so I guess that's that. I know what you mean. It's difficult to survive out there without an injection of caffeine. You never know, maybe he got treatment in time. "I'm sorry I hid things from you," he said. Right. Normally that makes it all better. I don't understand. I just met you yesterday That's what they all say.
Author norajane Posted January 13, 2007 Author Posted January 13, 2007 Sorry to hear it. How long had you been together? I seem to remember you two had known each other a long time ago and rekindled things more recently? We've been together for two years this time. Friends for 20 years. Normally that makes it all better. I don't understand. Funny, isn't it? They always say the nicest things when it's break up time.
burning 4 revenge Posted January 14, 2007 Posted January 14, 2007 I don't understand why it had to be done. Your friendship is older than half the posters here. I hope you two work this out.
InsanityImpaired Posted January 14, 2007 Posted January 14, 2007 Awww... sorry this happened to you norajane. A to cheer you up.
magichands Posted January 14, 2007 Posted January 14, 2007 :( I'm still sad. Have you been drinking? I remember a past Australian Prime Minister saying it was "a recession we had to have." It's always darkest before the dawn. Then again, that dude was always full of sh*t.
Pyro Posted January 14, 2007 Posted January 14, 2007 Hard to tell...too much wine last night. But he ran out of here this morning without even coffee, so I guess that's that. Had to be done. I called him out on a lie I recently discovered. Something he hid from me back when we first started dating...another woman, of course. "I'm sorry I hid things from you," he said. Right. He's sorry he got caught. Sorry that you have to go through the pain of a break-up, but would be it be any better to stay with him, and not be able to trust him? LS is here for you NJ.
magichands Posted January 14, 2007 Posted January 14, 2007 I don't understand why it had to be done. Your friendship is older than half the posters here. I was wondering why the spelling and grammar on here is so bad. You could have told me. I hope you two work this out. Me too.
Author norajane Posted January 14, 2007 Author Posted January 14, 2007 Thanks, everyone, for you kinds words and We have been friends for a long time. Very good friends. He hurt me and it makes it hard for me to trust what he tells me, and I have to be able to trust. I don't want to be wondering. I avoid making things uncomfortable as much as he avoids conflict. It's easy for us to sweep things under the rug. But this matters to me, enough that I had to force myself to make things uncomfortable...force him to face conflict. We have to learn to deal with conflict, not hide it. He'll give a lot of thought to what I said. Logic and reason will lead him to conclude this relationship has too high a degree of difficulty. That's what he usually does, anyway. And I, I usually fall for inappropriate men. That's why he and I are still single. Sorry, I'm rambling now... And Magic, I haven't been drinking. I'm still hungover from the wine last night.
Rooster_DAR Posted January 14, 2007 Posted January 14, 2007 Sorry Norajane!! Secrets for most and tear down trust and can be painful. Sounds like alchohol could have been a catalyst here as well. Hang in there, perhaps you guys can work this out, after all you have a very long history. Good luck NJ!
magichands Posted January 14, 2007 Posted January 14, 2007 And Magic, I haven't been drinking. I'm still hungover from the wine last night. What's an inappropriate man?
Author norajane Posted January 14, 2007 Author Posted January 14, 2007 Ok, well, I can't be hungover anymore. So that feeling in the pit of my stomach isn't the wine. It's disappointment. Damn. Tums doesn't work on that.
Author norajane Posted January 14, 2007 Author Posted January 14, 2007 Sorry Norajane!! Secrets for most and tear down trust and can be painful. Sounds like alchohol could have been a catalyst here as well. Hang in there, perhaps you guys can work this out, after all you have a very long history. Good luck NJ! The alcohol was necessary. I needed the Dutch courage. Sometimes I'm a real marshmallow when it comes to standing up for myself.
Author norajane Posted January 14, 2007 Author Posted January 14, 2007 What's an inappropriate man? Men who are geographically undesirable, age inappropriate, married, have issues with commitment and intimacy...men I can't really be with in the end.
magichands Posted January 14, 2007 Posted January 14, 2007 Men who are geographically undesirable, age inappropriate, married, have issues with commitment and intimacy...men I can't really be with in the end. Have you ever considered women?
Author norajane Posted January 14, 2007 Author Posted January 14, 2007 Have you ever considered women? Tried that once. No magic. I love men. And I really love this man. It seemed like we were both on the same page this time. But I guess that was wishful thinking on my part. Just because I felt lucky to have him in my life, doesn't mean he felt that way about me.
Porn_Guy Posted January 14, 2007 Posted January 14, 2007 Men who are geographically undesirable, age inappropriate, married, have issues with commitment and intimacy...men I can't really be with in the end. you forgot ugly
Author norajane Posted January 14, 2007 Author Posted January 14, 2007 you forgot ugly Ugly on the inside? Or out?
Touche Posted January 14, 2007 Posted January 14, 2007 Sorry, NJ. But the guy never wanted what you wanted. Maybe now, you'll be free to find the right guy.
Author norajane Posted January 14, 2007 Author Posted January 14, 2007 Sorry, NJ. But the guy never wanted what you wanted. Maybe now, you'll be free to find the right guy. That's what I keep trying to tell myself. It doesn't change how much it hurts, though. He's the one who f*cked this up, yet I'm the one who feels stupid.
miss snoopy Posted January 14, 2007 Posted January 14, 2007 I know exactly how you feel Norajane. It's hard to tell yourself over and over again it's for the best as you're probably still numb, but that's what I recommend - imagine having these sorts of conflicts in 2, 3 years time, and the sooner it ends if it's not meant to be, the better. I know whatever we say, it'll still hurt like hell... so many hugs and vent away!
Author norajane Posted January 14, 2007 Author Posted January 14, 2007 I know exactly how you feel Norajane. It's hard to tell yourself over and over again it's for the best as you're probably still numb, but that's what I recommend - imagine having these sorts of conflicts in 2, 3 years time, and the sooner it ends if it's not meant to be, the better. I know whatever we say, it'll still hurt like hell... so many hugs and vent away! I am still numb, though in a hurts-like-hell kinda of way. I feel stupid and foolish, and I wish he'd fight like hell to have me in his life. I can't fix this; he has to step up and try, but I just know that he'll hide in the safety of silence. And I know I should be glad to end this now rather than later, but how can I be glad? So then I feel even more foolish for wanting this to be resolved so we can be together. Damned hope. Out of all the evils in Pandora's Box, hope is the most pernicious and persistent.
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