oceanlvr Posted January 7, 2007 Posted January 7, 2007 but it sucks! When we met, both of us were recently dumped by our respective partners. Our situations were so parallel that we instantly bonded. We both felt that we needed to form a solid friendship first before taking it to the next level. During the next six months, everything was good. Both of us were having fun and going places. It wasn't 100% perfect, but for the first time we both felt that we were experiecing something healthy. Then a month later, he started acting weird...like distant. Apparently, he started getting more involved with his church and he told me that we should refrain from having a physical relationship. He said that he wanted to make sure I really liked him as a person. I was completely shocked, but I didn't hesitate respecting his wishes. Yes, I became suspicious and kept my eyes and ears open, but he wasn't out on the prowl. Shortly after that, I inquired about us becoming an "official" couple. He got nervous and said he wasn't ready. He didn't want to lose me and asked me to be patient. Like an idiot, I stuck by him. Then we have more bizarre behavior. He stopped emailing me all the "cute" messages, he told me that he didn't like french kissing, then he didn't want to kiss at all and he wanted to stop holding hands. Here I have done nothing but give to this man for almost 1 1/2 and I wasn't getting **** back. He was actually taking things away. I knew what was going on, but I was too deep into this. Everything finally came to a head and he told me that he didn't see us together as a couple. That I am a very nice girl and I did nothing wrong. He said he was the one who is messed up and it's his fault. He apologized for putting me through a lot of crap towards the end. He said he didn't expect me to stick around after ending our physical relationship. When I did, he didn't know what to do. Telling the truth would have been nice. We are still friends and have met up for dinner a few times. I had a hard time doing that. He bought new clothes and completely changed his look. He goes out and does other activities. I remember he would only take me to dinner because he said he was too tired to do anything else. For me to see the "new him" was a slap in the face. I'm ok talking to him on the phone, but I can't see him right now. It's been two months and I have held up really well. Periodically, I start to think about this **** and it does hurt. The New Year is a fresh start for me. He called me on Friday...he said he had not heard from me and was wondering how I was doing. I was polite, talked about how busy I was at work and then ended the conversation before he could ask me what I was doing for the weekend.
uksteve Posted January 7, 2007 Posted January 7, 2007 Maybe you both needed someone to understand, but when the feelings died down about the ex's you both need to move on? Just IMO!
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