Guest Posted January 4, 2007 Posted January 4, 2007 I've noticed that the guy I've been seeing for about 3 months now has been lying about small, insignificant things. Mainly they are details about stories that basically make him look good. For example, he told me that the night before he took the GMAT (admissions test for business school), he got really drunk and almost didn't make it to the testing center in the morning. He now goes to an ivy league business school, so he must've gotten a really good score. But I know that it's impossible to score high on the GMAT without advanced preparation because I'm studying for it now. At first, I passed these things off as his turning on the charm and trying to impress me, but now I think more and more about it and wonder what else has he lied about? It's not like he's lied about anything that has been that important (as far as I know), so is ok it to assume that maybe he doesn't think he's doing anything wrong since the lies are nothing but self-bolstering anecdotes? But even so, is this questionable behavior? Because what if he has also been lying about other things he has said (e.g. how he feels about me)? I guess this is mainly a question for the guys. Is it typical for guys to lie about meaningless little details? I mean, I understand when guys lie about their height or penis size (he has for both), but what about other things? He once said that when he first saw me, he was completely smitten. Is this also his turning on the charm? I would really prefer if he just told me the truth. It's not a big deal if he had study for the GMAT to get a high score... How do I confront him? Sorry for the multiple questions. Thanks in advance for any help provided.
typical Posted January 4, 2007 Posted January 4, 2007 It's not a big deal if he had study for the GMAT to get a high score... How do I confront him? You dont. This is all just wild speculation. He could have gotten really drunk and almost didnt make it, or maybe he was puffing himself up a bit. One thing is for sure: You really dont know. Dont go blasting into this full steam ahead with just speculation. It wont go over well unless you have concrete facts. Mainly they are details about stories that basically make him look good To some extent, everyone does this from time to time when they realllly like someone and want to impress them. If this goes on longer than normal, it could signify a narcissistic disorder. I mean, I understand when guys lie about their height or penis size (he has for both), what guy doesnt? Because what if he has also been lying about other things he has said (e.g. how he feels about me)? I think it is completely normal to feel like that, but dont go questioning every little white lie to mean that he was also lying about how he feels. Oh, who am I kidding...thats exactly what I would do...scrutinize and examine until everything is opened and dissected and there is nothing left to uncover.. Just try not to worry overmuch until it bleeds over into personal areas like where he was, or who he was talking to or some other nonsense like that. Is it typical for guys to lie about meaningless little details? Sure its typical. But that tends to fade away with maturity I think.
TheDC Posted January 4, 2007 Posted January 4, 2007 I mean, I understand when guys lie about their height or penis size (he has for both), but what about other things? Well the other stuff I can understand a few white lies to make oneself seem more interesting but to lie about your height and penis size that just seems ridiculous to me. I'm a guy and I've never lied about that sort of thing. What kind of psycho lies about physical properties I mean you are going to get caught. If you lie about your height and you meet for the first time she'll know you lied and when you finally get her in the sack she'll know you aren't all that. I'm 5'11" and absolutely average for a man with my cultural heritage.
Walk Posted January 4, 2007 Posted January 4, 2007 You know.. I used to think my bf was telling those little white lies.. but dang, I dug into it, and he wasn't lying. He really did have a flock of peacocks stalking his house. He really did get stabbed multiple times in the groin by an ex gf. Go figure. I thought he was making it all up to impress me. But his neighbor (who I found out owned the peacocks) was sure as hell pissed at my bf for killing one of them. And I never believed him when he said he woke up one morning petting a woodchuck next to his bed thinking it was his cat... until I woke up there one morning and there were 5 skunks running around the house terrorizing the cats. Who knew?? I also know that sometimes perspective causes communication errors. He might be saying he didn't study because he only spent one night studying, whereas when he really studies he spends days on it. So to him, he didn't study. You however, might see cracking the books at all as studying. So therefore he wasn't being completely honest. He wasn't, but he was just giving you his perspective on what happened. Same thing with penis size and height... some guys really do think their penis is bigger than it is. How many guys actually compare erect penises with other men?? I don't know any. So maybe in his head, he really is "BIG", having no real comparison in which to measure. Why would you burst his bubble? Actually, I've found that when men lie about penis size it's because they're really insecure about it. Either they're fishing for reassurance, or trying to convince the woman that she's wrong if she thinks it's small.
Poboy Posted January 4, 2007 Posted January 4, 2007 there are people who lie because they want you to believe they are average when the truth is they are quite the intelligent n smart t not appear as show-offs ... negative lieing there are people who lie to always put the best image out and it will continue on ... positive lieing he will continue to lie as long as his not made aware that you hate it and he shouldnt do it. he lies bacause he thinks he might not be good enough for you and keeping you impressed is the way to go... it may be he does it with everyone around... if thats the case , its a troubled road ahead .
Guest Posted January 5, 2007 Posted January 5, 2007 Thank you all for responding with such honest opinions. It really put things in perspective for me. Otherwise, I'm sure these thoughts and questions would've just eaten me from the inside out. But you guys really helped me out. I definitely won't dwell on these little details because in the grand scheme of things, they're not that important. And you are right, I have no way of knowing whether they are lies or not. I'll just have to see down the road. Thanks again!
Recommended Posts