bonehead Posted January 1, 2007 Posted January 1, 2007 But her comment would be ok if the lady had come in swearing left and right?? You only answer to this is its not an issue. How is it not an issue? Nothing had been said about an affair. We were talking about her comment pure and simple
Trialbyfire Posted January 1, 2007 Posted January 1, 2007 Married man hitting on a known OW. MM walks in with wife. Mocking comment about wife regarding why the MM would want to stray in the first place. This is a funny situation because he's a jerk. The above is the Coles notes version of what the OP wrote. It was obvious that the OP thought he wanted an affair. Betrayed found the comments unacceptable. That is all.
bonehead Posted January 1, 2007 Posted January 1, 2007 Married man hitting on a known OW. MM walks in with wife. Mocking comment about wife regarding why the MM would want to stray in the first place. This is a funny situation because he's a jerk. The above is the Coles notes version of what the OP wrote. It was obvious that the OP thought he wanted an affair. Betrayed found the comments unacceptable. That is all. But you stated that if it had been any other issue that KA was talking about it wouldnt have been mocking. How is that possible?
Trialbyfire Posted January 1, 2007 Posted January 1, 2007 But you stated that if it had been any other issue that KA was talking about it wouldnt have been mocking. How is that possible? Married man hitting on a known OW. MM walks in with wife. Mocking comment about wife regarding swearing like a trucker so that's why he would want an affair. This is a funny situation because he's a jerk. Married man hitting on a known OW. MM walks in with wife. Mocking comment about wife being fat and reference to why MM would want to stray in the first place. This is a funny situation because he's a jerk. I know which one is more offensive.
bonehead Posted January 1, 2007 Posted January 1, 2007 I know which one is more offensive. Your still trying to dodge the question.
Trialbyfire Posted January 1, 2007 Posted January 1, 2007 Your still trying to dodge the question. Nope. That is my point.
bonehead Posted January 1, 2007 Posted January 1, 2007 Why is it offensive when you ASSUME it was a looks issue, but it would be not be offensive if it was her swearing left and right???
Trialbyfire Posted January 1, 2007 Posted January 1, 2007 Why is it offensive when you ASSUME it was a looks issue, but it would be not be offensive if it was her swearing left and right??? If this MM has been going to a gym, and his wife looks like she needs a gym, then there is a really good chance HE has a problem with her appearance. Most people who take pride in how they look want to be with those who do the same. Perhaps you're having the same issues that I am in remembering everything said in this thread.
bonehead Posted January 1, 2007 Posted January 1, 2007 Ok. Would KAs comment about knowing why MM was flirting with her been non mocking if she had stated the wife came into the gym swearing left and right?
Trialbyfire Posted January 1, 2007 Posted January 1, 2007 In comparison to the a looks issue, if couched properly, I'm sure it would have been less offensive.
Trialbyfire Posted January 1, 2007 Posted January 1, 2007 Okay, one more time. Betrayed have self-esteem issues due to the impact of an affair. It relates to looks more than swearing like a trucker. One more piece of information for a man. Women are more sensitive about their looks in the first place never mind adding the impact of being a betrayed.
bonehead Posted January 1, 2007 Posted January 1, 2007 Okay, one more time. Betrayed have self-esteem issues due to the impact of an affair. It relates to looks more than swearing like a trucker. One more piece of information for a man. Women are more sensitive about their looks in the first place never mind adding the impact of being a betrayed. Ok, so you are assuming what ever the husbands issue with his wife is, it was CAUSED by an affair. Am I correct?
Trialbyfire Posted January 1, 2007 Posted January 1, 2007 Ok, so you are assuming what ever the husbands issue with his wife is, it was CAUSED by an affair. Am I correct? No. You're drawing inaccurate conclusions. The issues are, there was a mocking comment made by a known OW about the wife of a cake eater. Betrayed appeared to take offense. My comments surrounded a number of reasons why.
bonehead Posted January 1, 2007 Posted January 1, 2007 but only took offense because you ASSUMED it was about looks. And it was only a mocking comment because you assumed it was about looks. Your not even looking at the fact that what KA SAW may have fit EXACTLY what he said. OMG maybe he DIDNT lie.
Trialbyfire Posted January 1, 2007 Posted January 1, 2007 Okay, I'm done. You appear to be forgetting the contents of the thread.
bonehead Posted January 1, 2007 Posted January 1, 2007 No I havent. But it gets to me when a BS comes on here and tells a FOW that she was wrong based on ASSUMPTIONS, then goes and says that THEY hold a seperate standard between looks and actions. If it was offensive on the assumption it was about looks it should be offensive if it was based on personality traits. People were offended based on assumptions, and jumped the poster based on that assumption
Author kymberann Posted January 1, 2007 Author Posted January 1, 2007 Well good morning all! What a classis example of people just jumping to conclusions with out having or asking for further answers (YES that would be the BS's in this case). You're drawing inaccurate conclusions. The issues are, there was a mocking comment made by a known OW about the wife of a cake eater. Betrayed appeared to take offense. I never made mention that this guys W appeared to take offense. She doesn't even know me from squat, why would she be offended, unless she was already on to her H. Then I say good for her! All actions and behaviors were directed towards him, not her! If anybody was or should be mocked it is the H in this situation, can't you see that? Or am I just again proving that ALL Other Women should be blamed for being devious, with sexually exploitive and manipulativly decietful manners that go and steal H's from unassuming, innocent victims such as the poor W's who don't know any better?
lasan Posted January 1, 2007 Posted January 1, 2007 Oh please, I am the last person to think that about an OW. I have had the misfortune/fortune to meet several of my ex's OW and within the exception of one have never had an issue. I took issue with what you said about her. It was a nasty comment. You can come back and try to clean it up later if you want. Like I said, would you have said what you said to us to her face? *edited to add* But yes your main point is well taken....He's deserves to be uncomfortable. You just could have said it without making comments about his wife.
puddleofmud Posted January 1, 2007 Posted January 1, 2007 Another consideration is that maybe he LIKES her that way. I have found that a woman's appearance may have little to do w/ affairs. It seems to be more about an insecure need for attention. I know many very gorgeous men who are not at all attracted to slim women and prefer what society would label the opposite. Ideals of attraction vary greatly!
Guest Posted January 1, 2007 Posted January 1, 2007 Don't we teach our kids to not judge a book by it's cover? Your issue is with the MM, not the wife. Why is it funny that she is less than what you would consider attractive? Who makes you the one to decide that she is not attractive?
Trialbyfire Posted January 1, 2007 Posted January 1, 2007 No I havent. But it gets to me when a BS comes on here and tells a FOW that she was wrong based on ASSUMPTIONS, then goes and says that THEY hold a seperate standard between looks and actions. If it was offensive on the assumption it was about looks it should be offensive if it was based on personality traits. People were offended based on assumptions, and jumped the poster based on that assumption I quoted you on that one and I suspect I could find more. Let's not get into assumptions, shall we? Overall I feel that the comment was needless and mocking. Sure, she's a personal trainer and observes bodies. That she has made it her priority in life to look good versus others making different things their priorities, doesn't make it okay to mock a cake eaters wife without knowing her circumstances. Anyways, I was ready to fall asleep at the kb last night and really, it became a circular discussion without much merit.
herenow Posted January 2, 2007 Posted January 2, 2007 OK, so I think I understand this. You think that it's funny that a MM who hit on you has an unattractive wife, and that it's no wonder he's looking for an OW. This is the first time you have ever seen her and all you know about her is what the MM told you. I know that the OW in my case has a habit of "dating" MM and that she continues to have sex with at least one of them because he pays her bills. I also know that she wears too much make-up and dresses provocative (I'm being nice here). So, when I see her for the first time I can say "Wow, she's such a whore, no wonder MM think she's easy", and that would be funny too?
Guest Posted January 2, 2007 Posted January 2, 2007 Why do you care about the wife? What is she to you? Why would anything about her be funny if you have nothing to do with her husband? I think you protest too much! Why would you laugh at someone behind their back? What makes you better than her? You don't even know her!
Author kymberann Posted January 2, 2007 Author Posted January 2, 2007 Why do you care about the wife? Never said I did What is she to you? Nothing Why would anything about her be funny if you have nothing to do with her husband? The post was about the MM, never said anything WAS funny about W I think you protest too much! Take a look at who is protesting? Hit a nerve? Why would you laugh at someone behind their back? Wasn't laughing at or about W was commenting on how MM was uncomfortable, was commenting that he was willing to cheat! and that I WAS NOT! What makes you better than her? You don't even know her! You are right, it wasn't about her! I don't know her and she doesn't know her Husband!
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