Guest Posted December 25, 2006 Posted December 25, 2006 Hello everybody. I am a 26y/o male, professional, of Indian ethnicity. I tend to be outgoing, especially on the weekends and I frequently meet women at clubs and other social gatherings. During the past year, I have been meeting a lot of great women. On one hand I can meet a beautiful woman, on another smart, another funny, sometimes all the qualities, etc etc. I feel that I connect with a lot of people but when I start to get to know them I can tell a lot of them want something more, i.e. a relationship, after some time. My problem is I cannot decide who I want to start something serious with. I missed out on this one great girl...but I feel that I always meet these interesting women but I don't want to pull the trigger because I might find someone better. I know when I get into a relationship I'll become fixed into it that eventually that person will be my wife which scares me! haha. Anyways if anyways have any personal experiences let me know.
phat_mike Posted December 26, 2006 Posted December 26, 2006 Trust me, you just know. Just follow your heart
alphamale Posted December 26, 2006 Posted December 26, 2006 My problem is I cannot decide who I want to start something serious with. then have arranged marriage and let your parents decide
Guest Posted December 26, 2006 Posted December 26, 2006 Trust me, you just know. Just follow your heart YUP - It is unexplainable you just know. And they do as well. And you both find a way to tell each other. I believe everyone has a 'One' for them, whether you every meet or stay together once found is a matter of WANTING. the key is to not think in terms of the 'ONE' but in terms of showing self love by reaching out and except the consequences. In my case, I have done just that - I reached out many times to the 'One' and while I believe she sees me as that as well, her response say otherwise. I told her I can no longer be the one to reach out because of how she has reacted and politely but firmly stated that it now rests with her. And I have not worried about that since. For example - she promised she would contact me today [face to face or by phone] and as of 8:12, she has not. So, I am not anxiously waiting for a response, if I get one - GREAT - then we start, if not, come morning, it wil not be the first thought that comes to mind.
GivingUp Posted December 26, 2006 Posted December 26, 2006 Hey Bro i believe that there isn't the one i believe u make the one if u find all the things that u ar looking for in the girl then she is the one. man there are so many beautiful women out there there is always one better out there and there is always more of the ones to
Aloros Posted December 26, 2006 Posted December 26, 2006 Whether or not there is a "one", I'm uncertain, but I'll tell you how I knew my bf was someone I wanted to get further involved with, in case it helps. The first time I saw him, there was that immediate zing you get, that rush of adrenaline, when you see someone you find attractive. He says he had a crush on me from the moment he first saw me, which I suppose can describe my reaction. The more we talked, the more I found out we had in common, and we agreed on the things that were important to me. He seemed to want to be around me, and I definitely wanted to be around him - I thought about him a good deal. He literally made me weak in the knees after we spoke - giddy and unfocused. The first time we kissed...wow! I don't know how to describe it. It's been six months now, and we spend nearly all our spare time together. We get irritated with one another once in a while, but haven't really fought yet. There's not a thing I would change about him. We remind one another once in a while that we're on the same team, and I know there's at least one person who will always have my back. Things don't always happen that way. The person you end up with should be someone who excites you, someone who feels, to you, like they're on your side, someone who makes you want to be the best person you can possibly be because they believe in you and you'd never want to disappoint them. You won't know these things in the beginning. You have to take a chance on a person or you'll just be waiting for the right one to come along for the rest of your life. You'll never ever KNOW that someone is the best possible person for you, and that's part of loving someone. It's a leap of faith. Sheesh. And I would have sworn I didn't have a romantic bone in my body until he came along.
orangehose Posted December 27, 2006 Posted December 27, 2006 Okay, it sounds to me like you're inundated with great women and they're all so great that you can't make up your mind. I mean, it's cool that you like the women you're meeting. It also sounds that you can't get into a relationship with one of them without essentially committing to marrying them. And here's where I'd suggest caution - there are a lot of things you don't really know about someone, and about their compatibility with you, until you actually get involved in a relationship with them. Sorry if I'm stating the obvious, but I'd recommend choosing someone to get to know further with a gut instinct, and then having a clear conversation with them early on about how you feel that you need to get to know her further without essentially committing yourself to marriage with her.
Trialbyfire Posted December 27, 2006 Posted December 27, 2006 You'll know. She will be the one who will make you risk commitment.
Butterflying Posted December 27, 2006 Posted December 27, 2006 If you have to ask this question about them, then they aren't the ones for you. But you have to know, or have a general idea of what you want in a serious relationship, or marriage. That will help you decide who fits the description more closely. No matter who you choose, there will always be someone better. You have to reach a point of contentment. It's easy to imagine having somone better than you have. When that happens, imagine not having the person you love. If you feel like replacing the person you love, then you don't really love that person. Eventually, you will meet someone whom you feel is better than everyone else, even if they aren't. The key is that you believe they are.
rina_r Posted December 27, 2006 Posted December 27, 2006 but I feel that I always meet these interesting women but I don't want to pull the trigger because I might find someone better. . They say that "better is the enemy of good".
vanessabg Posted December 27, 2006 Posted December 27, 2006 then have arranged marriage and let your parents decide it is better to you get marriage a girl which select your parents and ignore all wrong deeds.
Grrlish Posted December 27, 2006 Posted December 27, 2006 The grass is always greener...where you water it.
IpAncA Posted December 27, 2006 Posted December 27, 2006 I think you need to ask yourself if your ready for get married. Are you in a point of your life where you feel that your ready for such a committment. Have you accomplished your goals, are you happy, do you have your life in control and in order, etc...list could go on and on. Are you happy in your current job, have a steady paycheck....etc... Then you have to understand that you can't change that person and their not going to change themselves and anything that bothers you about that person is going to remain (habits). Theres really not a cold hard sheet that says if this person has this and that and you have done this and that then it's an all go. It's a chance that people take and it may or may not work out but if you don't take the risk of it then you'll never know and may miss out on what could be a great life. IMO it's pretty much someone that makes you happy, who you can share you life with, their able to see the real you, accept you the way you are, and can't live without. Sure there is more here that can be added but it's a start. But first thing first, you have to find someone. Then that person has to feel the same way that you feel about her.
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