MuffinMan Posted December 24, 2006 Posted December 24, 2006 Alright, I need some more advice. My MW's H keeps emailing my soon to be exW about me. He keeps asking her all kinds of questions about me and trying to dig deeper into my life. I know this as fact because she showed me the emails. I've told my exW everything about the A so nothing he tells her is news to her, but I think it is information he just received. He's asking her where I live, what I've been doing, what's she's been doing, etc. Why does he care? Him and his wife are trying to work things out, but he is asking all these questions about me. My exW knows he doesn't know the whole story about the A and she hasn't told him anything. Should I tell her the next time he contacts her to spill the beans about everything?
GreenEyedLady Posted December 24, 2006 Posted December 24, 2006 Alright, I need some more advice. My MW's H keeps emailing my soon to be exW about me. He keeps asking her all kinds of questions about me and trying to dig deeper into my life. I know this as fact because she showed me the emails. I've told my exW everything about the A so nothing he tells her is news to her, but I think it is information he just received. He's asking her where I live, what I've been doing, what's she's been doing, etc. Why does he care? Him and his wife are trying to work things out, but he is asking all these questions about me. My exW knows he doesn't know the whole story about the A and she hasn't told him anything. Should I tell her the next time he contacts her to spill the beans about everything? His W is obviously not telling him JACK or he thinks she's lying to him...I don't think you should have your XW tell him anything...If you want him to know certain things, have her tell him to contact you...or let him wonder...
oyster Posted December 24, 2006 Posted December 24, 2006 Why does he care? Him and his wife are trying to work things out, but he is asking all these questions about me. Should I tell her the next time he contacts her to spill the beans about everything? yes do spill the beans. H is gathering intelligence on YOU so he can fabricate and distord stories about you. His ultimate goal is to put question marks into her brain about your honnesty, your life etc. (paint you as a more destructive mofo than he is). this should scare her enough to see grass ain't more green and why bother leaving my confortable misery for the unknown misery and go with a more "evil" partner. If you face these accusations like I did, 1- State you rules to the MW 2- Refuse to discuss non-sense 3- If she is furious, shut her up by asking "show me the proof", you won't ever find them because your hubby made all those stories up. Paid people to call you. (my MW hubby paid some chick to pretend to be my wife and asked MW to leave her and my kids alone. I DON'T have kids and never was married!!!!)
Author MuffinMan Posted December 24, 2006 Author Posted December 24, 2006 His W is obviously not telling him JACK or he thinks she's lying to him...I don't think you should have your XW tell him anything...If you want him to know certain things, have her tell him to contact you...or let him wonder... His W isn't telling him anything. He thinks we slept together 2 times, when in all actuality it was more like 50. He doesn't know anything about us planning a future together. I'll take your advice and tell her to have him call me if he has questions about my life. Maybe that will make him stop, because I know he won't contact me.
Author MuffinMan Posted December 24, 2006 Author Posted December 24, 2006 yes do spill the beans. H is gathering intelligence on YOU so he can fabricate and distord stories about you. His ultimate goal is to put question marks into her brain about your honnesty, your life etc. (paint you as a more destructive mofo than he is). this should scare her enough to see grass ain't more green and why bother leaving my confortable misery for the unknown misery and go with a more "evil" partner. If you face these accusations like I did, 1- State you rules to the MW 2- Refuse to discuss non-sense 3- If she is furious, shut her up by asking "show me the proof", you won't ever find them because your hubby made all those stories up. Paid people to call you. (my MW hubby paid some chick to pretend to be my wife and asked MW to leave her and my kids alone. I DON'T have kids and never was married!!!!) All of this is going on 2 days before Christmas and I started the 90 NC with her on Wednesday. I've done good to this point, but I'm in the dark on all of this. I know there are certain things my soon to be exW isn't telling me. I'm totally in the dark on all of this. I almost want to get everyone in the room together and tell them all to leave me the F alone. It's very frustrating.
GreenEyedLady Posted December 24, 2006 Posted December 24, 2006 You're doing good...it's going to be confusing and hard for awhile...but keep posting here...we'll support you...
bonehead Posted December 24, 2006 Posted December 24, 2006 Tell her to tell him that until the voices in your head settle down she can not say what hospital your at out of fear that he may attempt to disrupt your treatment. Just kidding, She should straight up tel him you two are seperated, she isnt and never was your babysitter.
Author MuffinMan Posted December 24, 2006 Author Posted December 24, 2006 Tell her to tell him that until the voices in your head settle down she can not say what hospital your at out of fear that he may attempt to disrupt your treatment. Just kidding, She should straight up tel him you two are seperated, she isnt and never was your babysitter. Thanks for the laugh. She told him last time he contacted her, "Don't you have a marriage to be working on?" If he keeps it up I think she might set him straight. I'm going to let him hang himself. He doesn't know who he is messing with when it comes to her.
pureinheart Posted December 24, 2006 Posted December 24, 2006 He sounds really obsessed and nosey....he thinks with each "interrogation" that new info will be told.... You might be feeling a bit violated, if you are I know exactly how you feel....you just want it to stop....
Author MuffinMan Posted December 24, 2006 Author Posted December 24, 2006 He sounds really obsessed and nosey....he thinks with each "interrogation" that new info will be told.... You might be feeling a bit violated, if you are I know exactly how you feel....you just want it to stop.... I really think he is trying to screw with me. He got what he wanted when she decided to give it a shot. It's been about a month since she made that decision so now he thinks everything is going to be alright with them. Now that he feels secure with her he thinks he can start screwing with me to get a little revenge. What he doesn't know is I really hold all the cards. If he knew the whole truth, and I can prove everything, it would screw his world. I'm not willing to do that to someone unless he forces my hand. I want out of all the drama.
bonehead Posted December 24, 2006 Posted December 24, 2006 Thanks for the laugh. She told him last time he contacted her, "Don't you have a marriage to be working on?" If he keeps it up I think she might set him straight. I'm going to let him hang himself. He doesn't know who he is messing with when it comes to her. If more seperations would go like yours. She sounds like she has a good head on her shoulders. He will hang himself in the end. Does his wife know what he is doing?
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