ahsumgurl909 Posted December 23, 2006 Posted December 23, 2006 I have been sitting here all night waiting for my BF to come over. His phone has been turned off for most of the evening. Wel he just called me and I said "Are you coming over?" He said "I'm never coming over there again!" "I found someone else!" I cant believe this MFer! We just spent an intire week together having such a good time together and he told me that he was never going to see his EX again. Well thats who he is with now. The woman who put him in prison for almost ten years for defending himself after he was jumped per her request. Well Im freaking so pist off right now. He totally built me up just to slam me down. WTF?? I love him so much! Im so crushed. Why would he spend all that time with me telling me he loves me and **** just to F me over like this?? This makes my Christmas even WORST then it was already!! I swear if I had some pills or a gun I would just end it right now!!! F LIFE I HATE LIVING DAMN IT!!! :( :(
Guest Posted December 23, 2006 Posted December 23, 2006 huh? gawd. that happened to me tonight too. i drove in freezing rain twice - all the way from bank street and knocked on the door. that;s ok though i was not invited - i sort of invited myself and that's not polite. but she brought the tub in and i hope she accepts the gifts - i made something special for her, and the flowers need water
Guest Posted December 23, 2006 Posted December 23, 2006 it kinda funny about instant messaging. i only have 5 contacts, and one is my ex wife [for urgent stuff with daugheter] and the rest i don't think i have contacted in ages. not that big on msn im - only really use it for certain things. i was reading something elsewhere that there is a trend lately where if a man contacts a women, she immediate assumes he is only interested in sex. if that is the case, there are a lot of women out there that have had a hard time in life with men. because i would never call someone up for that - that's weird. do u think it is possible that even when someone knows u really well, that societial influences, and past relationships, could spill over into another and paint a picture of someone that is not correct? i am starting to get the notion that this is happening more and more often
Rooster_DAR Posted December 23, 2006 Posted December 23, 2006 I have been sitting here all night waiting for my BF to come over. His phone has been turned off for most of the evening. Wel he just called me and I said "Are you coming over?" He said "I'm never coming over there again!" "I found someone else!" I cant believe this MFer! We just spent an intire week together having such a good time together and he told me that he was never going to see his EX again. Well thats who he is with now. The woman who put him in prison for almost ten years for defending himself after he was jumped per her request. Well Im freaking so pist off right now. He totally built me up just to slam me down. WTF?? I love him so much! Im so crushed. Why would he spend all that time with me telling me he loves me and **** just to F me over like this?? This makes my Christmas even WORST then it was already!! I swear if I had some pills or a gun I would just end it right now!!! F LIFE I HATE LIVING DAMN IT!!! :( :( Jesus **st!! That is a **cked up thing to do especially during the holidays. I guess that's why they always say stay away from people who have broken up with their recently, this seems to happen often. Try to calm down, you don't want to start thinking about hurting yourself. Don't let him get the best of you.
Guest Posted December 23, 2006 Posted December 23, 2006 You know, I've been where you are and let me tell you it is the worst feeling ever. The first week I spent with my girlfriend was shear heaven. We had the most intimate and loving week together I thought I'm so glad I waited my whole life for this moment. All the bs up to that point was worth it to finally have a taste at true love. Then the last day I was there she broke up with me and said we were too different and that it wouldn't work out. I later learned that she dropped me for someone else and was with them the very next day. I felt like you do and let me tell you he did u a HUGE favor! Let him go. I know thats not what you want to hear right now, but you are so much better than this. Anyone that could do something like that to another human being has a HUGE problem that has absolutely NOTHING to do with YOU. Its selfish and jumping back to his ex the way he did makes her a rebound. Wether it being a rebound or just because of who he is as a person, that relationship with his ex will not last(just as it didnt the first time around) Relationships take work, they take love, patience, and persistence. Do you really think you deserve someone who is not going to give 100% of their heart and their commitment? Trust me, I got back with my ex and not only did she cheat on me again with the same person again the week before i moved their to be with her, but she dropped me a year later because she couldn't get over someone she fell in love with years ago that broke her heart. I know you wouldnt believe it but this pain you feel right now is mild compared to having him again and having him do it to you again. If his heart and his head or not together and he doesnt know that its you that he wants, then you dont need him. You ARE BETTER than that! Please do not consider hurting youself for him or anyone or anything else in this world. Try to find the positive in the negatives and remember that (as cheesy as it sounds) there is a rainbow after every storm. Go out and do something for someone who has it much worse than you like help the homeless this christmas, or try to spend time with friends and family. If all else fails, do something good for YOU this christmas and celebrate the blessing of having a very hurtful person removed from your life before you gave him any more of your heart. This way you still have sense of self and your heart to give to someone more deserving. You are not going thru this alone. Look around, there are thousands of ppl on these boards that are going thru similar heartbreak. I know its hard now, but lean on faith. If you don't believe in any God, believe in yourself! Have faith in yourself and that you CAN and you WILL get thru this.
Author ahsumgurl909 Posted December 29, 2006 Author Posted December 29, 2006 I wish I had something positive to say right now but things just keep getting worse in this situation. My heart is lying on the floor bleeding and not beating anymore. At least thats what it feels like. Can you believe day before yesterday. He was suppose to come get me to spend some time with me. He ended up never showing up but called me at 12:30 am and said Im at the motel room 117. I jump up get in my car drive over there. He had obviously been there all day and with someone else he admitted. Said they didnt have sex they argued about me the whole time. I fell for it like a lame ass and felt so degraded for being in a room with him that he had been in all day with someone else. WTF is wrong with me how could I allow myself to be treated in such a manner. I am starting to feel so low and worthless. Seriously I cant take it anymore. Not only that but he got a motel the next night too, last night. And the whole time we were there he kept saying is that her? Did you hear that? Did she just knock? And then proceeded to call out her name really loud saying. "I'm in here room 202 help me?" I didnt know what the hell he was going through but didnt say anything and started crying because I was worried about his mental state of mind. He ended up dropping me off this morning and headed directly to her house. And Im hurting big time and dont understand why this is happening to me or why I am allowing it to happen. I just dont know.
lorr Posted December 29, 2006 Posted December 29, 2006 Oh god! What a complete ass wipe! Let me tell you that this guy is not worth you killing yourself over. The best thing you can do is be with your family and friends around this time, and try to muster every last bit of energy you have to move on from him. He is so not worth it!!!
chryssy83 Posted December 29, 2006 Posted December 29, 2006 You deserve so much better than this!!! Do you have a friend or family member that you can tell about this? Someone who might volunteer to "babysit" you?? When my ex broke up with me, I kept wanting to go to him and see him or talk to him but my friend was willing to stay with me all day and tell me no. She would just talk to me about him or anything else, or I could nap because I wasn't sleeping at night, or whatever. It really helped.
jusified Posted December 29, 2006 Posted December 29, 2006 Yea he sounds like a loser. You really deserve better. Wow, thats a really good friend you've got chryssy
Author ahsumgurl909 Posted December 30, 2006 Author Posted December 30, 2006 Im just glad I personally dont know anyone on here or I wouldnt be able to say these things. I feel so discussed with myself. I have no friend that could control me I am a stubborn mule I hate to be told what to do and I have a distructive personality. I have been through alot in my life I mean so much I am surprised Im still here. From a very young age til now I have never felt loved and wanted by a single person I know except my eldest daughter. And she is pretty mad at me about this situation. Cuz I wont listn to reason. My mind set is if I give up I lose him if I keep trying I can help him and he will love me for that.
Curmudgeon Posted December 30, 2006 Posted December 30, 2006 ...if I keep trying I can help him and he will love me for that. No he won't. He's incapable of doing so and even if he could, he doesn't care enough about anyone but himself.
Author ahsumgurl909 Posted December 30, 2006 Author Posted December 30, 2006 I know! I Know! Gosh darn it and even though I know I still hurt think and feel for him. I hate this CRAP Im staying single forever and ever. I knew I was gonna die a spinster!!
jusified Posted December 30, 2006 Posted December 30, 2006 LOL, go join a dating website, I'm sure you will find te right person even if you need to go through like 500 applicants.
BlueEyedSarah Posted December 30, 2006 Posted December 30, 2006 Wel he just called me and I said "Are you coming over?" He said "I'm never coming over there again!" "I found someone else!" I cant believe this MFer! We just spent an intire week together having such a good time together and he told me that he was never going to see his EX again. Well thats who he is with now. He sounds like a heartless bastard!
lorr Posted December 30, 2006 Posted December 30, 2006 I am going to be blunt and say that you need to stop with the defeatist attitude. You have a daughter to think about, and not being funny but there is alot worse that people have to go through in life i.e Losing their home, Financial hardship,Death of a loved one etc. This guy needs to be taught a lesson and that lesson is for you to move on from him. Yes it will be extremely hard, but when he realises that you are doing other things to occupy your time,and that you are not contacting him, he will have more respect for you, and he will eventually realise that he may have lost a good thing. But if you keep contacting him and pursuing him, he will just think that you are weak, unstable and a major pushover. There is nothing wrong with you, but you need to wake up and realise that he has got major issues with himself, and that he alone has to be able to deal with it. As the New Year is around the corner, why don't you sit at home with no distractions, get a pen and a notepad and think about places you would like to go to, hobbies you would like to take up, more things you would like to do with your daughter. If it is depression that you are suffering from then you need to see a doctor or a therapist about it. Make this your first step by getting all the help that you need. Once you start feeling better about yourself, the last thing that you need is to jump straight into another relationship. Get used to being on your own, and embrace the single life, and only then will you meet someone who will find that part of you more attractive.
Curmudgeon Posted December 30, 2006 Posted December 30, 2006 Im staying single forever and ever. I knew I was gonna die a spinster!! Oh, I don't think so. You are a long way from spinsterhood or Old Crone status. Just get rid of the dead wood and you'll be fine.
Grrlish Posted December 30, 2006 Posted December 30, 2006 What an a-hole he his. Hon, it's time for therapy if you really feel that losing him is losing anything. He doesn't want to be with you, otherwise he WOULD be with you. (Sorry, that was blunt.) How will you ever be 100 percent sure in the future? And maybe next time it won't be his ex; maybe next time it will be someone new. Move on, hon. Time to get some self-love, baby!
Author ahsumgurl909 Posted December 30, 2006 Author Posted December 30, 2006 He stayed the night last night. I feel so bad for him. He is really mentally unstable. I just wish he would help himself, I cant help to feel that (and this is my belief anyway.) Is that we met each other for a reason. What that reason is I don't know but I know every person I meet is not by chance and that there is something to come of that meeting to help fate run its course. I don't know why I am going through this and I know it isnt me to stoop this low for any man. So the only thing I can come up with is I am here for a reason and when I am done learning from it or teaching him something or guiding him somewhere or planting a seed then it will be over. Does anyone understand what I mean? I know that it will end when its suppose to how its suppose to. Because no matter how badly I want out something is keeping me here. And thoughts on this?
lorr Posted December 30, 2006 Posted December 30, 2006 If he is mentally unstable, then he needs to seek professional help, but not by you. The best thing that you can do for him, is to let him go, so that he is able to seek the necessary help(that is if he wants it).You are not his mother or baby-sitter. Around 7 years ago I went out with a guy who had serious mental health problems, and believe me that was the most upsetting and draining experience of my life. I felt trapped in the relationship and at the same time I thought I was doing the noble thing by "saving him". It all came to a head one evening when he told me that he was going to end his life, and I was in a complete state of panic.Things got from bad to worse, and I ended up confiding with family members and a close friend, and believe me they made me realise that what he was doing to me was completely selfish and that he should get help. Fast forward a few years later, and I hear that he is engaged to be married and that he is expecting his first child. I am happy for him, but at the same time it makes me realise all the things I had to go through with him,in the relationship. Again you need to realise that whilst you are there molly-coddling him like a baby, that you are not doing him any favours whatsoever. You need to let him figure things out for himself, and let him stand on his own two feet, regardless of how hard things are for him. Only then when he gets the proper help or treatment, will he then decide whether he wants to be with you or not.
Guest Posted December 30, 2006 Posted December 30, 2006 GAWD. that's the last thing my pal would do - she doesn't put up with crap like that. frankly, i don't know what all the fuss is about, she's great. i've never noticed anything that she can't handle. we just chill, play some tunes, like every one friend does. the only thing i remind her to do is take the meds because she doesn't like them and i keep saying but it really makes a difference. and you know these things don't stay static you know people who take care of themselves, have good friends - lots of times things sort of chill out for a while. as for a relationship, who mentioned an r? thanks but she'll let me know - she makes her own decisions
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