Guest Posted December 22, 2006 Posted December 22, 2006 I just moved back home and have been having a hard time getting in touch with my friends. I was really looking foward to moving back here because I had a very active social life while I was here, 4 years ago. In the last week, I've been playing telephone tag with friends who take days to call me back. This morning I was supposed to have a lunch date with one of them and she never called. Not even to say she couldn't make lunch. I've basically harassed another girl I considered my best friend to the point of shame. (I left her 4 messages, she returned one but I missed her call). I'm somewhat hurt and having a hard time keeping my head straight about all this. I know it's Christmas time, people change, people have lives and I shouldn't expect them to drop everything for me, but a little enthusiasm would have been nice. Or some calls returned. As it is now, I feel like I no longer matter to anyone. And the phone is still not ringing.
che_jesse Posted December 23, 2006 Posted December 23, 2006 Did you keep in contact with any of these people? Its all about priorities, each of us has a certain slot on everyone else's priority list, if your gone for 4 years you drop pretty low on that list. Are you mad because your "active social life" is part of what brought you back? If thats the case you'll be disappointed. Go make some new friends, thats your best bet.
Guest Posted December 23, 2006 Posted December 23, 2006 Did you keep in contact with any of these people? Its all about priorities, each of us has a certain slot on everyone else's priority list, if your gone for 4 years you drop pretty low on that list. Are you mad because your "active social life" is part of what brought you back? If thats the case you'll be disappointed. Go make some new friends, thats your best bet. I have kept in touch through e-mail and messenger and would see them every time I visited my family. I think that I wasn't usually this sensitive about it because I knew I wasn't staying long. So I would just show up, have a blast, and leave. But they would also return calls and make our appointments. So maybe the fact they know I'm here for awhile changes things, in the Christmas rush and all. But you are right about priorities. I know that it's part of it. Fortunately I moved here because I got a promotion, so I'm counting on work to keep me busy and hopefully meet new people. thanks for your reply.
Love Hurts Posted December 23, 2006 Posted December 23, 2006 My father and his friend dressed up in a Santa hats. Carried a duffle bag through their hometown going house hopping to see old friends they hadn’t seen in years. Toting a sac of gifts and a few ho ho hos they said, pick a gift from the sac, had a short visit with each household and moved on. They had a great time. Try dropping by (after Christmas Santa) Merry Christmas PS ……….what was in their sac of goodies? Naval oranges, chocolates, liquor and lumps of coal. If all that is a bit much for you ………..try calling after Christmas. If you still get no response……the previous poster could be right………its time to move on in your own home town. (don’t give up yet you never know until you know)
CarolAnne Posted December 24, 2006 Posted December 24, 2006 LOL they gave away lumps of coal?? That is so random! I *love* the idea though, ppl might not have time to return a call but they usually have time to get presents
Curmudgeon Posted December 24, 2006 Posted December 24, 2006 There's an old saying about returning to your hometown. It's, "You can never go back." Times, places and people change and it's almost impossible to pick up where you left off.
Love Hurts Posted December 24, 2006 Posted December 24, 2006 Glad you got a laugh out of that one CarolAnne. Its true a gift is the best way to soften and warm someone heart. There's an old saying about returning to your hometown. It's, "You can never go back." Times, places and people change and it's almost impossible to pick up where you left off. Curmudgeon, I agree with that old saying … in part. I read it as you can never go back to your youth. Ex….. If I left a church or a social club for four years: I know I could return and chances are 80% of those same people will still be there. I would be excited to see them, hug and tell them it’s good to see them and want to know how life has been treating them. That can happen anywhere from old co-workers to family members that live out of state. If you enjoyed the company of those people and they yours… you can or will again.. like a high school reunion. Hometown……. is just geography its people that matter and either they got along or they didn’t. I do believe people can grow apart in various ways even if they are side by side daily. Just my thoughts. Merry Christmas
Guest Posted December 24, 2006 Posted December 24, 2006 Thank you all so much for your replies. They really cheered me up. I decided to treat this move as any other move to an unknown city and went out on my own, ran into people I knew who invited me to a party. This was a party where I would not have known many people - in fact I knew no one except for the friends who invited me, but I made it a point to chat up everyone I could. I had a great time and I've already started meeting new people. This made me feel a lot better about moving back home. And since then my friends have started returning calls in troves. So I'm feeling a lot better and am quite in the Christmas spirit. Moving back home is going to be quite the adventure I believe. Perhaps even more so then moving to a foreign country. And since I love travelling, I think I will enjoy the experience and learn a lot. Merry Christmas to you all and a happy new year!
Grrlish Posted December 25, 2006 Posted December 25, 2006 Thank you all so much for your replies. They really cheered me up. I decided to treat this move as any other move to an unknown city and went out on my own, ran into people I knew who invited me to a party. This was a party where I would not have known many people - in fact I knew no one except for the friends who invited me, but I made it a point to chat up everyone I could. I had a great time and I've already started meeting new people. This made me feel a lot better about moving back home. And since then my friends have started returning calls in troves. So I'm feeling a lot better and am quite in the Christmas spirit. Moving back home is going to be quite the adventure I believe. Perhaps even more so then moving to a foreign country. And since I love travelling, I think I will enjoy the experience and learn a lot. Merry Christmas to you all and a happy new year! Glad to hear that things are going better! Keep a positive attitude. And I think that looking at moving home after being gone this long as something akin to moving to an unknown city is a great idea. You will not only still have the old friends that you're able to connect with again but you will also be out making new friends! Merry Christmas!
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