hrtingsobd Posted December 22, 2006 Posted December 22, 2006 Need some advice: Confused about a guy...suprise, suprise. I had decided that I needed to have a fling. I Shoot pool in a league. Every Thurs. I get a babysitter and shoot pool. While shooting pool, about a month ago, I ran into a guy that I have known since grade school. We played pool most of the night but I was dating my b/f (topic of b/f never came up although he asked if I was married to which I replied No). We broke up 3 weeks ago. (I know I am not nearly over the break-up). I have seen him in the bar every week for the last month or so. My friend says he watches me the whole time and I feel him watching me. He knows I have kids....but by his own admission he has commitment issues (38 and never married and no kids). I asked him why and he said Becaucse then I can do what I want." One night a girl came in and gave him a key to his place. After she left, I asked him if that was his gfr. He said no. His buddy said no also. Friends with benefits of a sort is what his friend said tonight. Tonight I all but laid it out there without coming right out and asking him out....such as "are you going to be in here Saturday?" His response: "Saturday is 2 days away and I don't know." He normally comes over and stands real close....or comes by me every so often. I do the same to him. Tonight by the jukebox, i put my hand through his arm and touched the inside of his arm and he pulled it close to him. I see how he looks at me...I am sure I look at him the same way... Herein lies the question: What is stopping him? I don't know if he knows about my recent break-up or not but if he is just wanting sex, who cares? Can anyone help me figure this out? And why in the heck am i trying to figure it out anyway? I know i am in a bad emotional place but I want to have a fling....who better than someone I have known since I was 5? He hasn't asked for my # or anything....What gives?
Okeydokey Posted December 22, 2006 Posted December 22, 2006 sounds to me like the problem is that you guys have know each other since you were five. prob. feels funny about having a fling with someone he's known that long... somehow it's diff if you've known someone for a really long time even if you have not seen each other or were never really that close. if he is not into the commitment thing id put money on it that he's stuck bc he doesn't think you guys can have a no drama fling and he doesnt want to commit to anything more.
Guest Posted December 22, 2006 Posted December 22, 2006 hey, all i can tell u is this, if someone was interested in me, and i was interested in them, and hey asked me if i wanted to do something on a saturday night - you better believe i would say YES and not only be there but pick them up and take them to a place where it would be just her and i is that strange?
TheDC Posted December 22, 2006 Posted December 22, 2006 Sounds to me like he likes you, and is interested in you but he isn't a total d*ck. He knows that he has commitment issues and he also knows that you have kids and he's assuming that you are looking for a LTR. I suspect that if he knew that all you were looking for was a fling he might be more receptive.
Author hrtingsobd Posted December 23, 2006 Author Posted December 23, 2006 Thanks for the input. I haven't seen him since....but I MAY see him tonight. i think that will be a sign right there don't you....he knows where I will be and if he shows then he is interested, if not, then better for me to find someone that is.....Thanks! BTW...not directed at anyone in particular, but as a general question....just because I have kids, why do people assume I am into some kind of LTC? I know that that is what everyone truly wants, but I logically know I am not ready for that so I am wanting to do a fling. Also, what are the chances that a fling will turn into LTC? Just curious on that one! Thanks all!
brickaney Posted December 24, 2006 Posted December 24, 2006 This seems like one of those things that could go either way. Bad or Good. Judging his "single man" character I'd say it's very likely anything between you two isn't going to mean anything to him. but then again there is that slight chance that he's got a soft spot & things between you two could work out. Most likely not though. If a fling is what you want, you've found a good guy to have it with< just make sure ur protected since he seems to be a swinger, lord knows what he's carrying.
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