Guest Posted December 20, 2006 Posted December 20, 2006 I have been in this EMA for more than 8 years now. I love him and I believe he loves me too. Of course, not enough to decide to be with me and leave his wife. His wife knows. She looks the other way, as long as we are discrete, she does not meedle. But now I am worried, I am 1 week late and feeling very weird. I never worried about birth control because he is supposedly infertile, and I am 44 so the chances of getting pregnant are so low. I am so worried I can not think of anything else. I am at work obsessing over this and checking pregnancy sites. Took a HPT and came out negative, but that does not surprise me, since when I was pregnant with my son (now 16) I tested several times negative, both urine and blood test
blind_otter Posted December 20, 2006 Posted December 20, 2006 If you are worried schedule an appointment with your doctor.
Sassy Posted December 20, 2006 Posted December 20, 2006 Totally agree with Blind go to the dr to put your mind at ease. Could it be stress throwing your cycle off?
Freedom Now Posted December 20, 2006 Posted December 20, 2006 I went through a similiar situation and I was, indeed, pregnant. My daughter is now 16 years old, has a wonderful relationship with both me and her father, and we as parents are very good friends although he would like more than friendship. Sometimes God takes a bad situation and makes it good. Everything happens for a reason. But, for practical purposes, go see your doctor. Have you talked to your MM about your concerns about the potential pregnancy?
Guest Posted December 20, 2006 Posted December 20, 2006 But, for practical purposes, go see your doctor. Have you talked to your MM about your concerns about the potential pregnancy? Yes I am planning to see the doctor after the Christmas break. No, I have not told my MM. He is going to get very worried, no sense in worrying him before I know for sure.
Freedom Now Posted December 20, 2006 Posted December 20, 2006 Good. Take care of yourself and know that everything happens for a reason.
Guest Posted December 20, 2006 Posted December 20, 2006 Good. Take care of yourself and know that everything happens for a reason. OF COURSE YOU TELL YER HUSBAND SILLY!
ratingsguy Posted December 21, 2006 Posted December 21, 2006 If it turns out that you're not pregnant, make this a lesson learned. Get on the pill, or tell your partner to start wearing protection. Now only if I would take my own advice!
Guest Posted December 21, 2006 Posted December 21, 2006 I have been in this EMA for more than 8 years now. I love him and I believe he loves me too. Of course, not enough to decide to be with me and leave his wife. His wife knows. She looks the other way, as long as we are discrete, she does not meedle. But now I am worried, I am 1 week late and feeling very weird. I never worried about birth control because he is supposedly infertile, and I am 44 so the chances of getting pregnant are so low. I am so worried I can not think of anything else. I am at work obsessing over this and checking pregnancy sites. Took a HPT and came out negative, but that does not surprise me, since when I was pregnant with my son (now 16) I tested several times negative, both urine and blood test It's possible that you are going through perimenopause (pre-menopause) and your cycle is changing??????????? Good luck. Hope everything works out for the best
blueyes77 Posted December 21, 2006 Posted December 21, 2006 I dont know how it will go for you but Ill share with you what ive gone through if you want I just had a baby by my MM and its been hard
HereToStay62 Posted December 21, 2006 Posted December 21, 2006 Hi all, I registered after all. No changes today. I will see my doctor next week. I have been reading and pregnancy signs can easily be confused with the onset of menopause, so maybe that's the case. It is very possible I am pre-menopause, that would explain the negative HPT and the symptoms. It is not that I would not welcome a child in my life. I am totally independent and have a very good job, so I could certainly have a baby on my own. But of course it is not ideal at 44. Blueeyes, how was your experience?
blueyes77 Posted December 21, 2006 Posted December 21, 2006 when i found out i was pregnant we couldnt beleive it cause he said he had been fixed which i think was a lie but anyway he ask me not to have the baby because of our situation that he didnt want me to have to take care of the baby by myself because there was no way he could leave his little boy that if it werent for him he wouldnt ask me to do it well i dont believe in abortions so i kept the baby because like you i knew i could take care of her by myself I have two other children from my ex-husband so knew it wasnt that hard so for the whole nine months he stayed with me and still wants to keep seeing me but whats hard is he doesnt act like he even cares about her at all hell ask about her every now and than if i start talking about her he changes the subject to his little boy after she was born the only thing he ever said was i hope you understand why i cant be there and if things were different i would It just is hard to keep seeing him thats why after x-mas im going to break it off just cant handle it and another thing that makes it so hard is she looks just like him
HereToStay62 Posted December 21, 2006 Posted December 21, 2006 I am sorry for what you have been through, Blue. I really have no idea what would happen if I am pregnant. I will keep the baby, for sure. I would be very upset if he does not treat him/her the same way he treats his other kids (he has two). Maybe I am being naive and wearing the rose colored glasses, but I believe he would be a good father, despite the situation. We will see. I have seen enough around to realize some times they are so worried about preserving the situation, they would be capable of throwing everyone -even the baby- under the bus. As I said, we will see what happens. And, of course, maybe I am not pregnant at all (hopefully) and just drowning in a glass of water.
Ssheena Posted December 21, 2006 Posted December 21, 2006 WTF?? Haven't you two heard of birth control? Get an IUD or something. 44, it could be start of peri-menopause but jeez. I'm sorry Blue but I really have no sympathy for you. For your daughter yes, but you? Nope. That's just stupidity on your part (imho).
HereToStay62 Posted December 21, 2006 Posted December 21, 2006 It is not that simple. I can not be on the pill or IUD for health reasons. MM was diagnosed as not fertile many years ago, low sperm count/low mobility; he and W. had to go through several expensive sessions of IVF to get their kids. I seemed to get pregnant easily with my two kids, but we have been together for more than 8 years, and at my age I really was not expecting this to happen. Anyway, I'll be happy if I am pregnant, happier If I am not.
norajane Posted December 21, 2006 Posted December 21, 2006 Condoms, people, condoms. Aren't you worried at all about STD's? For all you know, his wife is out boinking people, too, and could possibly pass on something fun, like herpes.
Tough Girl Posted December 21, 2006 Posted December 21, 2006 Of course you know better than to not consider protection...but don't we all know better than to get involved with MM and MW???? I do not know about perimenopause, but your body can certainly react wildly to lots of external stresses. I had a similar situation about a year ago - one week late - my doctor told me the cause might never be apparent and that the situation might never happen again. Just a fluke. Any recent changes in stresses?
HereToStay62 Posted December 21, 2006 Posted December 21, 2006 Do you use comdoms in your relationship NoraJane? We have been together for 8+ years. This may be a non-ordinary relationship, but it is a stable one and we are faithful to each other. Neither of us is boinking other people. Nor is his wife. Like I said, she knows about us and as long as we don't bother her, she doesn't bother us. Like I said, a child is welcome in my life. I have raised two wonderful, healthy kids and I can raise another one. And if I am not pregnant...we can always have Paris.
norajane Posted December 21, 2006 Posted December 21, 2006 Yes, we do use condoms. I'm not worried about STD's at this point, but we aren't using any other BC and we don't want children.
puddleofmud Posted December 22, 2006 Posted December 22, 2006 This is YOUR body and you have every right to make your own decisions regarding pregnancy and how you wish to handle this. What is done is done, thus, should you be possibly be pregnant and since you have stated you would wish to continue the pregnancy than for the time being please take good care of yourself. Until you have an concrete answer that is all that matters right now! Best wishes for good health and peace of mind!
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