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How do I know it's for real?


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Posted

Okay, so how can I know that he really wants to break up? If I can't believe that he doesn't love me and can't push all the plans we've made out of my head...if I still feel so sure that we were made to be together and this has to be some sort of bad phase...if I wake up every day and think about him as though this never happened and then have to remind myself....if immediately after breaking up with me he left town on an apparently unplanned vacation of sorts....am I just in denial? Is there a chance that he, too, feels that this is the wrong decision and will eventually come around? Is there a chance that he will come back and call me and say he can't live without me?

 

Why am I incapable of being angry with him, no matter what he does??

Posted

Yes, there is a chance that he can come back and say that he can't live without you. But you need also to realize that there's a chance that he doesn't. It's hard, but when you find yourself stewing away on these tangents, try to stop yourself and think about something else.

Why would you be angry? It doesn't sound like he's done anything wrong. He's looking out for his best interests, maybe you should follow suit.

Posted
Why would you be angry? It doesn't sound like he's done anything wrong. He's looking out for his best interests' date=' maybe you should follow suit.[/quote']

 

 

He attempted to cheat on me (although he stopped at dates) and I wasn't angry. I always forgave him with little or no effort on his part because I can't stand to see him the slightest bit unhappy.

Posted

He attempted to cheat on you?

 

What does that even mean?

Posted

Have you and your bf had been seeing each other for a while? Has your bf given you a clear indication of what the break or break up means to him?

 

Anyway it sounds as though this is recent news and has come as a shock to you. So, it's natural you would be thinking this is all a bad phase and your bf will "snap out of it." You may have hardly had time to absorb what is happening. But it's important to determine what may be wishful thinking and what is a real possibility. You may need more information to answer that question. I'm sure you don't want to be responding to mixed messages or holding onto something that can't be. Can you give us some more information. There is a lot of help and support to be gained from LS. So keep posting!

Posted

Together 3.5 years.

 

Broken up before, but we always got back together.

 

And attempted--asked other people out.

Posted

you can't be angry because you care about him, and he's probably your best friend. it's just hard to stay angry with people you really care about in my opinion.

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