Jump to content
While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!

Recommended Posts

Posted

I didnt know where else to put this. Since the brain i really want to pick is His....

 

Why are men so complicated?

Posted

Same reason why men find us women complicated.

 

The situation you're in is complicated to begin with, as are most OW/MM, OM/MW affairs.

Posted

First you have to know which end to find it in.:laugh:

Posted
First you have to know which end to find it in.:laugh:

 

NID

 

THAT WASNT FUNNY AND I'm OFFENED!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

BUT (T?) seriously a man is only as complicated as you allow him to be. Same as a woman.

Posted
I didnt know where else to put this. Since the brain i really want to pick is His....

 

Why are men so complicated?

 

Careful, we dont have alot to spare

  • Author
Posted

I know thats the scary part....He has to be left with some brains...I need an intelligent conversation a few times in my life...

 

 

Careful, we dont have alot to spare
Posted

Men really are the easier of the two sexes to figure out.

  • Author
Posted

How? I talk and talk.. I look into things..

 

Now him. Tells me i overanalyze and look into things too deep.

 

 

 

Men really are the easier of the two sexes to figure out.
Posted
How? I talk and talk.. I look into things..

 

Now him. Tells me i overanalyze and look into things too deep.

 

Because you do. Men are NOT that deep. We women do overanalyze the average guy.

 

Guys aren't into the whole "talk and talk" thing.

Posted
How? I talk and talk.. I look into things..

 

Now him. Tells me i overanalyze and look into things too deep.

 

Women do over analyze. They always figure there just HAS to be something deeper, some deeper meaning.

 

Most men just are not that deep

Posted

I agree with bonehead, men are much easier to figure out. Problem is, we as women don't accept the simple face value of what they say expecting something more...deeper.

 

Men are pretty simple....like pointing and clicking.

Posted
I agree with bonehead, men are much easier to figure out. Problem is, we as women don't accept the simple face value of what they say expecting something more...deeper.

 

Men are pretty simple....like pointing and clicking.

 

But dont point and laugh

Posted
I didnt know where else to put this. Since the brain i really want to pick is His....

 

Why are men so complicated?

How? I talk and talk.. I look into things..

 

Now him. Tells me i overanalyze and look into things too deep.

Simple, if you want a man to open up to you, talk about his work, accomplishments, and goals.

 

If you want a woman to open up, talk about her home, relationship, and feelings.

 

Just a thought.......

Posted
Simple, if you want a man to open up to you, talk about his work, accomplishments, and goals.

 

If you want a woman to open up, talk about her home, relationship, and feelings.

 

Just a thought.......

 

Exactly.

 

Men don't open up about their emotions much.

 

Its a sign of weakness. You have to LEAD him into that, and make him feel 110% secure

  • Author
Posted

Everyone just said everything HE ALWAYS says to me....I guess it isnt a line... HMMMMM. Something to think about...Thanks guys

Posted
But dont point and laugh

 

And just WHAT might I be pointing at that causes shuch laughter???? :laugh:

Posted
And just WHAT might I be pointing at that causes shuch laughter???? :laugh:

 

 

HIS

 

Wallet DUH!!

 

Where was YOUR mind going????????

  • Author
Posted

Honestly I gave you guys MUCH more credit. I thought you were deep thinkers and faking all this time...

 

Im sorry

Posted
Honestly I gave you guys MUCH more credit. I thought you were deep thinkers and faking all this time...

 

Im sorry

 

 

Some actually are. But for the most part it really is a learned process.

Posted

Mz Pixie turned me on to two amazing books. Pretty simple reads, but a wealth of knowledge about how the opposite sex is wired.

 

Author is Shaunti Feldhahn

 

For Women Only - what you need to know about the inner lives of men.

 

For Men Only - what you need to know about the inner lives of women.

 

My wife and I both read these books. And it explained alot of what and why a women does what she does, or why she needs certain things to make her feel secure. Same for my wife, she kinda knew some things about men, but the book really opened her eyes to why we men are the way we are. Especailly when it came to respect for their man and why sex is important to us.

 

All I can say is, I now understand why my wife will in mid sentence on a totally diff topic will stop and tell me about the light switch I still need to replace....LOL. Where in the past i would just get angry and tell her she already told me yesterday.....

 

The reason is, women can have multiple issues and concerns going on in her head all at the same times....they cant seem to jsut focus on one issue...they deal with several issues all the time all day, untill the issue is resolved.

 

Were as the man is more linear in his thought pattern. We know the light switch needs to be replaced, but we also have the ability to close that thought until the time comes to change the switch. We can dismiss or set aside certain thoughts since they dont concern us at that moment in time. Women cant do that....the thoughts are there in her head, running all the time until the issue is resolved. And even then the issue is truely never closed....there is always lingering after affects. We as men would finish the switch replacement and the issue is out of our heads. Women, would see that the switch is new, but will still have the thoughts of, "I wonder if it will work, I wonder if he wired it correctly, i wonder if the kids will get shocked when they turn it on, etc. etc.

 

kinda funny I know, but its true in the way their mind process thoughts.

 

 

The way the book described this was similar to Windows on your desktop. Men can open a window, deal with it and close the window. Women can open the window....but they have a very hard time closing it....they are more likely to minimize the thought window....so they go through the day with multiple windoows opened and minimized...and they open and maximize with out her control....its hard for them to close the window....to close the issue.

 

 

anyway...great book and I learned alot. Just last night, my wife was stressing over something....I used what I learned and gave her some advice. She returned by telling me she is so glad i read that book, cause now I UNDERSTAND why she does what she does.

 

anyone who dont understand their spose or vice versa....get these books, you wont be disapointed.

Posted

BH,

 

I was thinking of....something else. Yes.

 

TMW,

 

You are now the possessor of very dangerous info and must be eliminated!!! LOL!!!

Posted
Honestly I gave you guys MUCH more credit. I thought you were deep thinkers and faking all this time...

 

Im sorry

 

Don't feel bad. Like BH said, some are, some aren't. And even those that are, aren't. Understand that? LOL! What I mean is, my H is a very deep thinker, but not all of the time. I never know when he is having one of his "deep" moments. Its kinda scary.

 

Most of my friends are male. So I do pretty well reading men, well 65% of the time anyway.

Posted
BH,

 

TMW,

 

You are now the possessor of very dangerous info and must be eliminated!!! LOL!!!

 

I've got you now!!!!

 

really though....if i only knew then what I know now. Instead of getting angry at some of my wifes "out there" tangent thoughts...i just give a little inner chuckle to myself and just go with it....cause I know if I dismiss the tangent issue and get defensive or play the I dont care attitude...it just strengthens the open window in her head.

 

Another thing I learned....when a woman whats to talk about a problem she is having at work or an issue with a friend or what ever. And she starts telling you this and that. What does a man do? He trys to fix the problem or he plays the maybe you should do this. or he tries to rationalize the situation and solve the issue. WRONG WRONG WRONG. A males first instinct is to fix the problem....and thats where the womans frustration is.....she dont want him to help her fix it.

 

She wants him to listen to her. Thats it. Becuase the problem is the not the issue itself.....the problem is the way the issue makes her feel. And men seem to over look this time and time again. All we here is whats wrong....when we should really be listening for what she is FEELing about the issue. Once we hear her feelings in her words, we can then address and comfort the feelings....which are the driving force in why she is so upset about the problem. And once we as men, know how to confort her feelings...she will feel secure in knowing that we understand her.

Posted
I've got you now!!!!

 

really though....if i only knew then what I know now. Instead of getting angry at some of my wifes "out there" tangent thoughts...i just give a little inner chuckle to myself and just go with it....cause I know if I dismiss the tangent issue and get defensive or play the I dont care attitude...it just strengthens the open window in her head.

 

Another thing I learned....when a woman whats to talk about a problem she is having at work or an issue with a friend or what ever. And she starts telling you this and that. What does a man do? He trys to fix the problem or he plays the maybe you should do this. or he tries to rationalize the situation and solve the issue. WRONG WRONG WRONG. A males first instinct is to fix the problem....and thats where the womans frustration is.....she dont want him to help her fix it.

 

She wants him to listen to her. Thats it. Becuase the problem is the not the issue itself.....the problem is the way the issue makes her feel. And men seem to over look this time and time again. All we here is whats wrong....when we should really be listening for what she is FEELing about the issue. Once we hear her feelings in her words, we can then address and comfort the feelings....which are the driving force in why she is so upset about the problem. And once we as men, know how to confort her feelings...she will feel secure in knowing that we understand her.

 

This is SO right.

 

Although, I am the same... if someone comes to me with a problem, I WILL try to offer a solution rather than empathise as such (although I try!).

  • Author
Posted

You know what I just going to TRY and take it as he says it....And not drive myself crazy anymore...

×
×
  • Create New...