higherground5 Posted December 15, 2006 Posted December 15, 2006 So as most of you may know, I've been dating this girl for about 5 months. She works in a business environment...for the goverment, where there are sometimes security guards to escort them to and from their cars etc. She came over last night and something fell from her bag, coat...whatever, but it was a magentic clip used to hold up a badge (you put it behind your shirt and it holds up anything with metal). I asked her..what is that? And she claims that it wasn't hers, it was mine. So obviously it is not mine...and I thought it was kind of fishy. So my question is how do I approach this moving forward? I'm doing my best to trust this girl, but this kind of gave me a red flag (but i could be reading into it as it could have come from anywhere). What do you guys/gals think I should do here? Forbin
Mythical Posted December 15, 2006 Posted December 15, 2006 So as most of you may know, I've been dating this girl for about 5 months. She works in a business environment...for the goverment, where there are sometimes security guards to escort them to and from their cars etc. She came over last night and something fell from her bag, coat...whatever, but it was a magentic clip used to hold up a badge (you put it behind your shirt and it holds up anything with metal). I asked her..what is that? And she claims that it wasn't hers, it was mine. So obviously it is not mine...and I thought it was kind of fishy. So my question is how do I approach this moving forward? I'm doing my best to trust this girl, but this kind of gave me a red flag (but i could be reading into it as it could have come from anywhere). What do you guys/gals think I should do here? Forbin I don't really understand what it was that fell from her and why that would have to do with her cheating? Sorry could you just explain what it is? thanks
norajane Posted December 15, 2006 Posted December 15, 2006 Question - why is cheating always first on your mind?
JackJack Posted December 15, 2006 Posted December 15, 2006 Why would she say its yours if you both know its not? I'm sorry man, but out of most of the other posts you have made, it seems you are fishing for reasons to be suspicious of her. I haven't read to many of your posts that scream she is doing something she shouldn't. I think you have some choices though. Either continue to let every little thing she does eat you alive. Or talk with her about how you feel, and hopefully she can reassure you things are ok. You have trust issues that need to be delt with. Have you been cheated on before? you just seem overly insecure to me. Sure its possible she could be doing something she shouldn't be, but none of your posts really point to that.
whichwayisup Posted December 15, 2006 Posted December 15, 2006 How much do you like this woman? I mean, 5 months and already you think she's cheating on you, what is the point of continuing things unless you talk to her about what you feel inside? It sounds to me like you have trust issues to begin with and you're just waiting for her to cheat. I don't know I haven't read your previous posts.
Mythical Posted December 15, 2006 Posted December 15, 2006 what is the clip thing!?! lol its bugging me!
norajane Posted December 15, 2006 Posted December 15, 2006 what is the clip thing!?! lol its bugging me! http://www.delviesplastics.com/pin%20backs.htm Those kinds of things are frequently given out as little giveaway tchotchkes at trade shows and other events, sometimes with logos on them. That's probably where she got it in the first place.
MOMMIE Posted December 15, 2006 Posted December 15, 2006 If it is you're in trouble....If she's not cheating on you yet, she soon will be....we warned you Forbs:laugh:
Mythical Posted December 15, 2006 Posted December 15, 2006 http://www.delviesplastics.com/pin%20backs.htm Those kinds of things are frequently given out as little giveaway tchotchkes at trade shows and other events, sometimes with logos on them. That's probably where she got it in the first place. What!?! So why does that mean she would be cheating?! Maybe she feels she has to lie and just panicks!!!
norajane Posted December 15, 2006 Posted December 15, 2006 What!?! So why does that mean she would be cheating?! Maybe she feels she has to lie and just panicks!!! I don't necessarily think she's lying. She probably doesn't know where it came from. It's one of those stupid little things that I keep finding everywhere, along with logoed USB sticks, logoed pens, lanyards, name badge chains, etc. I don't always know where they came from or even if they're mine. Who knows how long something like that had been sitting on the floor of my car or wherever - anyone could have dropped it.
Mythical Posted December 15, 2006 Posted December 15, 2006 I don't necessarily think she's lying. She probably doesn't know where it came from. It's one of those stupid little things that I keep finding everywhere, along with logoed USB sticks, logoed pens, lanyards, name badge chains, etc. I don't always know where they came from or even if they're mine. Who knows how long something like that had been sitting on the floor of my car or wherever - anyone could have dropped it. ok whoa man!! You mean its like silver and you can open it up by pressing it?!?! Those are on everything!!!!!!!!!!!!! I really don't get it that could have been from absolutely anything. I just found one on the ground in my cubicle just now and im clipping it on my finger but it kinda hurts.....one of those??!!...sorry im so bored here:confused:
norajane Posted December 15, 2006 Posted December 15, 2006 ok whoa man!! You mean its like silver and you can open it up by pressing it?!?! Those are on everything!!!!!!!!!!!!! I really don't get it that could have been from absolutely anything. I just found one on the ground in my cubicle just now and im clipping it on my finger but it kinda hurts.....one of those??!!...sorry im so bored here:confused: Exactly. Are you SURE you're not cheating on your bf? Maybe your other lover dropped it in your cubicle? You sound like you might be cheating when you say you don't know where it came from... The OP has a suspicious streak a mile wide, so any little thing could mean she's cheating in his mind.
Mythical Posted December 15, 2006 Posted December 15, 2006 Exactly. Are you SURE you're not cheating on your bf? Maybe your other lover dropped it in your cubicle? You sound like you might be cheating when you say you don't know where it came from... The OP has a suspicious streak a mile wide, so any little thing could mean she's cheating in his mind. lol funny stuff...hey be quit as if you wouldn't instantly fall for a guy forgeting his clip by your cubicle!! I don't want to bash the poster I mean I don't know what he has been through i remember seeing one familar post but still if this is the issue it needs to change for him adn people he will be with. It will not work
Author higherground5 Posted December 15, 2006 Author Posted December 15, 2006 I don't really understand what it was that fell from her and why that would have to do with her cheating? Sorry could you just explain what it is? thanks It was a magnetic badge holder. If you have scene name tags on any various worker, they are usually held up by this. My brother is a cop and he uses them. I might be creating this in my head...but she works with security guards, and her cousin has guy friends who work at best buy ...whatever. The question is...how did this magnetize to her bag, which then just happened to fall in my room. I know...this is far fetched...but wouldn't any guy be curious as to how this attached to her bag?
norajane Posted December 15, 2006 Posted December 15, 2006 It was a magnetic badge holder. If you have scene name tags on any various worker, they are usually held up by this. My brother is a cop and he uses them. I might be creating this in my head...but she works with security guards, and her cousin has guy friends who work at best buy ...whatever. The question is...how did this magnetize to her bag, which then just happened to fall in my room. I know...this is far fetched...but wouldn't any guy be curious as to how this attached to her bag? Maybe if it were a condom. But a badge magnet? Did you read the other posts here - those things are a dime a dozen and it could have come from anywhere.
Author higherground5 Posted December 15, 2006 Author Posted December 15, 2006 Question - why is cheating always first on your mind? Coincidentally, I've had two very bad relationships in the past where one girl cheated on me non-stop, and lied directly to my face she wasn't. The other girl used as her rebound, and she lied to me constantly as well. This girl happens to be coming off of a five year relationship where she broke it off...but we went from casually dating > exclusive dating > to her coming out and saying she's in love with me > to her saying that she sees me as her husband and baba's mamma etc. all in the matter of 5 months. Seems kind of fast...and it's starting to look like a rebound because she's changing her ways...
PandorasBox Posted December 15, 2006 Posted December 15, 2006 Coincidentally, I've had two very bad relationships in the past where one girl cheated on me non-stop, and lied directly to my face she wasn't. The other girl used as her rebound, and she lied to me constantly as well. This girl happens to be coming off of a five year relationship where she broke it off...but we went from casually dating > exclusive dating > to her coming out and saying she's in love with me > to her saying that she sees me as her husband and baba's mamma etc. all in the matter of 5 months. Seems kind of fast...and it's starting to look like a rebound because she's changing her ways... It will never work as long as you have trust issues from your past relationships. I'm not saying thats your fault, because its not, I'm just saying you might need help in dealing with what happened in your past relationships. You need to see that NOT ALL people are cheaters. I understand you are leary of people now becasue of what happened, but don't beat yourself up over wondering if she is or not, you will drive yourself crazy, plus you will push her away in the process especially if shes not cheating. You might be pushing away the one girl that might be doing you right.
lolablue Posted December 15, 2006 Posted December 15, 2006 I think your reading way to much into this. I have had stuff fall out of my purse and I'm like hmmm where'd this come from, she could have forgotten about it, we get busy we dont' remember every single thing we toss into our bags, pockets, etc. I really wouldn't question her on it, I mean if it was a pair of guys underwear, condom, sure, but a badge magnet?
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