Guest Posted December 14, 2006 Posted December 14, 2006 What are your thoughts...How long should a couple date before getting engaged. Couple is both in their 30's Opinions would be helpful Thanks!
Aloros Posted December 14, 2006 Posted December 14, 2006 My personal rule has always been a year minimum before engagement. There's the commonly given "seeing your SO through all the seasons" reason, but I also think it gives a couple time to get past the honeymoon phase and into working out the kinks in a relationship. It gives you time to see what will be the major issues, and whether or not these are things you are prepared to deal with for the rest of your life.
bab Posted December 14, 2006 Posted December 14, 2006 I agree with Aloros, at least a year. Since the two of you are in your 30's, you fall into one of two categories, and you should be able to determine which of these you are in: 1. Desperate and tired of waiting and ready to settle. or hopefully: 2. Have enough life experience to know what you want/don't want in a relationship and so can tell earlier on that you are ready to make that committment.
Walk Posted December 14, 2006 Posted December 14, 2006 I say at least two years and three months. But definitely wait at least a year. I say at least two because in my opinion every relationship seems to go through a really rough phase right at the two year mark. If you make it through that, then you've got a good chance of making it in marriage. If you don't.. .then you didn't waste the time and money of getting divorced.
goodfriendeva Posted December 14, 2006 Posted December 14, 2006 all depends on the people.. i got engaged a few months after dating my hubby.. it will be our yr in april
Curmudgeon Posted December 15, 2006 Posted December 15, 2006 What are your thoughts...How long should a couple date before getting engaged. I, too, think a years seems about right. By that time they should really know one another, warts and all. Having said that, my wife an I were engaged two weeks after our first date and married six weeks later. But we were old farts who had been friends and former coworkers for five years first. We just celebrated our 10th anniversary!
Wantingtogetitright Posted December 15, 2006 Posted December 15, 2006 I don't think you can set a time line on it. You will know when it is right. You will know when you are sure. You may meet someone and just know deep down that they are the one but you really do have to experience a lot of stuff together before you can really know for sure. Plus it depends on what you believe a marriage is. Why wait and see if you can get through the rough patch at 2 years or whatever, married or not you either get through the rough patch or you don't. Whether you are leaglly committed to that person as well as emotionally etc should not make a difference. Sorry this doesn't really answer your question does it.
Shrelana Posted December 15, 2006 Posted December 15, 2006 We were dating for 7 months, he proposed in 2004...the wedding's in 2007 (we were waiting for graduation/next phase of college). We hit a rough patch about a year into the relationship itself, but worked through that, and are going strong and ready for the wedding, which will be a month after he graduates (I just switched majors and will be another 2 or 3 years )
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